ARIA Singles Top 50 Chart Review: 4th May. The one with a whole lot of Noah's Great Divide

 Before we start this week...MAY THE FOURTH BE WITH YOU...now that that is out of the way lets dive into the week here because we did get an album bomb for "The Great Divide" by Noah Kahan however none of that affects the top ten where for a third week "Rein Me In" by Sam Fender and Olivia Dean returned to number one thanks mostly to sales.

"Man I Need" by Olivia Dean remains at number two as it lost a lot on its sales while streaming is still surprisingly holding up pretty well. 

The biggest gain in the top ten this week belonged to "Choosin' Texas" by Ella Langley which is gaining ground on both sales, streaming and surprisingly Youtube. 

Olivia Rodrigo's "drop dead" fell off the nunmber one three spots to number four thanks to major fall offs on both streaming and sales. 

"Daisies" by Justin Bieber slipped back one spot to number five because the Coachella discussion is dying off while "IloveitIloveitIloveit" by Bella Kay held firm at number six, the same going for "Dracula" by Tame Impala stalling at number seven.

"Beauty and A Beat" by Justin Bieber and Nicki Minaj tumbled three slots to number eight. while "Ordinary" by Alex Warren and "So Easy (To Fall In Love" by Olivia Dean remained where they are at nine and ten respectively.

Losers

Oh dear god, we have a mess of a week here but let's run through some of these double digit losers here (Only doing the double digit losers so to stop this from running too long). "Speed Demon" by Justin Bieber slowed down eleven places to fifty. 

"Risk it All" by Bruno Mars slumped fourteen to forty seven while  the public said pinky down to Katseye's "Pinky Up" so that fell a merciful seventeen slots to forty two. 

Drop Outs

As for the drop nuts, let's start with the established hits that should have exited months ago like "Die with a Smile" by Lady Gaga and Bruno Mars, "Vitory Lap" by Fred Again, Skepta and PlaqueBoyMax, "Sailor Song" by Gigi Perez and "Just Keep Watching" by Tate McRae.

Songs released this year that were on the way out anyway like "Swim" by BTS, 

Songs that got their momentum curtailed and I am not unhappy about it "Pop Dat Thing" by Dababy, "Freakin' Out" by Dexter & The Moon Rocks, "Be By You" by Luke Combs and "Die on this Hill" by Sienna Spiro. 

The rest including "House Tour" by Sabrina Carpenter and "Baby Steps" by Olivia Dean.

Gains and Re-Entries

I am combining the two this week because both are to do with Noah Kahan with the one big gain being "Porch Light" by Noah Kahan rising nineteen to twenty seven while "The Great Divide" by Noah Kahan returned at number twenty. 

New Entries

 So we have ten new entries this week but because nine of those come from Noah Kahan, I am going to limit myself to reviewing what made the top twenty and the best and worst in his case so "Deny Deny  Deny" at forty nine (desperately close to the best of the week), "Paid Time Off" at forty five, "Haircut" at number forty four (another great song), "Willing and Able" at number forty one, "Downfall"at number thirty four, "American Cars" parked at number thirty one and "Dashboard" at twenty nine. 

All that leaves us with three other new entries to talk about just we're not starting with Noah Kahan though...

46. "Boston" by Stella Lefty

Yeah before we get to the Noah Kahan, we have to deal with this song from an m, terican indie country singer songwriter Stella Lefkofsky who goes by the name Stella Lefty, she signed to country and Americana Atlantic Record imprint Atlantic Outpost and  is the daughter of the owner and founder of health technology conpany Tempus AI, Eric Lefkofsky which may well be the only memorable thing about Stella Lefty because this song is pretty darn well forgettable.

The problem here isn't really rhe content where its all about falling head over heels in love when you are desperately trying to stay single for the time being but I am not loving Stella Lefty's vocal delivery here which can come off as pitchy and really somewhat unpleasant to listen to, throw in the bland nothing of a melody and it just is not worth coming back to at all...NEXT!

30. "End of August" by Noah Kahan

"The Great Divide" is actually a really good but not quite great Noah Kahan album, it's an album that can absolutely feel it's run time at points however I absolutely adore this opening track where Noah Kahan explores nihilism and season depression as the seasons change and he can feel time slipping away as he anticipates the summer ending and the weather getting closer and that's met by the production as well with its gentle pianos and strings that give the song this lived in vibe. I will say I am not a massive fan of the filter over Kahan's voice but otherwise this might well be one of my favourite songs to chart to datre. Check this out.

16. "Doors" by Noah Kahan

Ending the week with the song getting the singe push from the album and yeah, I get why because this is actually not bad either, ot's a step away from stomp clap territory and closer to an indie rock sound that I actually appreciate a fair bit. The subject matter of the song is also pretty good too with Kahan exploring trauma sustained during childhood, the feeling of wanting to be loved but pushing that love away when somebody tries to give him the love he yearns for so badly. All up a pretty good song.

That completes the week and yeah, "Boston" by Stella Ledty is getting the worst of the week with "End of August" by Noah Kahan getting the best of the week. 

Next week should be pretty quiet but  we'll have to see. 

Pretty Fly (For 1999): 2nd May. Blame It on Millennium Bleeding Love Here Right Now, Lucky Me!

So we have quite the week in front of us with most of all of the new entries in the bottom half of the top fifty and the usual array of movement that we may as well get started straight away with the top ten where we have a new number one that being "No Scrubs" by TLC which moved up three slots to take the top spot, it's sales are excellent and I can see this being a stable number one for the time being. 

It held off "Why Don't You Get a Job?" by The Offspring at number two and "We Like to Party (The Vengabus)" by The Vengaboys at number three, both songs just couldn't go with "No Scrubs". 

Former number one "Baby, One More Time" by Britney Spears slipped back to number four with the bottom having fallen out of sales at this point, to the point it's going to come under pressure from the constantly yo yoing "The Animal Song" by Savage Garden which yo yoed back up one to number five, it was rnough to move past "That Don't Impress Me Much" by Shania Twain which slipped one to number six.

"Touch It" by Monifah continues to be annoyance refusing to move from number seven however it could come under pressure from the new arrival to the top ten this week courtesy of "Fly Away" by Lenny Kravitz up from thirteen to number eight.

"Until the Time is Through" by Five remains at number nine and "Anthme for the Year 2000" by Silverchair fell two slots to number ten. GG

Losers

It's all tearing down for The Living End with "All Torn Down" sliding from twenty six to forty one this week. 

Looks like the public aren't feeling "End of the Line" by Honeyz as it dipped ten to thirty five which is a shame as I really like that song still. "Lullaby" by Shawn Mullins dived from eighteen to thirty one. 

Gains

We have more big gains than losers this week beginning with "Honey to the Bee" by BIllie Piper up thirteen slots to twenty, this song is definitely catchy so I am not surprised to see this up off it's debut. 

Also up off it's debut last week is 4 the Cause with their cover of "Stand by Me" unfortunately up eight to twenty nine. 

"Last to Know" by Human Nature scored a ten place rebound to thirty two...delighted about this one while "Save Tonight" by Eagle Eyed Cherry is up eight to thirty three.

"9pm (Til I Come)" by atb gained nine slots to thirty seven this week in more pleasing news.

Really the only gain I am not thrilled about gaining is that of "Put Your Hands Up" by Black and White Brothers up eight to forty two...really, people? Come on, we can do better than this. 

New Entries

Six entries this week, beginning with...

50. "Love Lies Bleeding" by Sonic Animation

We're starting the week with an Australian dance and techno group called Sonic Animation and I'll give this song credit for actually being somewhat interesting and less repetitive with it's instrumentation and pretty solid base groove even if the lyrics are not anything to write home about, the content being about feeling ecstasy and desire  which makes sense for a song that would fit right in on the dancefloor. This song is fine enough but it's nothing I am going to come back to. 

49. "Millennium" by Robbie Williams

Time again to talk about the most successful solo member of Take That that being Robbie Williams and his new song that given we're heading to the new millennium because of course we had to have a song about it only this time Williams is taking inspiration from James Bond themes more specifically "You Only Live Twice" and satirically explores the jet set lifestyle and reflecting on the anticipation of the year 2000 within cuture and how generations going forward may lose some traditions which is actually not a bad tangent for this sort of song however I do think where the issue with this song is in how weirdly elegant the production is for a song about the future especially in the more orchestral arrangements...

Then again, it could be a case of past meeting future or something? Who knows? The song is pretty good, check it out if you are curious. 

48. "Blame It on the Weatherman" by B*Witched

Staying in the UK and we have the fourth single from B*Witched and I think I might like this better than any of their previous three singles more because yeah...this is pretty close to great with the storm sound effects, the gentle guitar and the girls harmonies on the hook. The song is about blaming the weatherman for the end of a relationship and using the horrible weather outside as justification for blaming the break up on the poor weatherman!

But yeah, I just love how this sounds and how the song builds and the vocals stacking on top of each other, this song is well worth yout time, check it out. 

46. "Right Here, Right Now" by Fatboy Slim

So we have the follow up to "Praise You" from Fatboy Slim and unfortunately I am not much of a fan of this at all, sure I get the instrumental appeal but that breathy voice going "Right here/..ight now" hits the wall of being incredibly annoying, it's somewhat lucky that the instrumentation is somewhat memorable because otherwise I'd say this is annoyingly forgettable rather than annoying and mediocre. Next!

45. "It's Our Time" by Ilanda

Yeah we're finishing with Australians this week beginning with vocal harmony and dance group Ilanda's newest song "It's Our Time" and well...this song is good old fun time with the gleaming funk keys and a pretty solid groove to match that feels reminiscent of what CDB were able to do in the mid 90s although I will say the countdown in the middle of the song is somewhat a bit unnecesaary and doesn't really fit in with the smooth vibe of the song. It's not bad overall. 

43. "Lucky Me" by Bachelor Girl

Wrapping up the week with the latest single from Bachelor Girl, a pop rock song where this woman has everything she could want in life such as a nice house, car etc but is bemoaning the lack of compassion and love within their community where people have put material things above loving other people and demonstrating care and compasion towards others (somethig that has only been deomonstrated more and more in the 2020s) and Tania Doko's vocal delivery does well to communicate how fed up she is with the dynamic at play here, in short another pretty great song that deserves your attention

That conpletes our week and wow, best and worst do not fall out easy here. I think I am going to give worst of the week to "Right Here, Right Now" by Fatboy Slim, it's the song I care least about of our new arrivals.

As for the best, it's a tight go but I am going to give it to "Lucky Me" by Bachelor Girl mostly because i think the lyrics hit hard and play well for introspection.

ARIA Top 50 Singles Chart Review: April 27th: The One Where Olivias Dominate and Bieber's Beauty Has A Renaissance

So this week was something...the re-emergenece of Justin Bieber's career post Coachella and a top three that is dominated by Olivias so let's just right into the top ten where Olivia.....Rodrigo claimed the number one spot with "drop dead", it's second new number one of 2026 (yes, the year has been utterly dominated by "Man I Need") and Olivia's fourth number one in Australia following on from "Drivers License", "Good 4 U" (both in 2021) and "Vampire" (2023)

"Man I Need" by Olivia Dean remains at number two while last week's number one "Rein Me In" by Sam Fender and Olivia Dean slipped off the top spot back to number three...I get the feeling that this song has peaked but fuck am I happy that it got two weeks at number one.

"Daisies" by Justin Bieber continued to benefit from Bieber's moment at Coachella jumping six spots to number four and we continue with Bieber because his 2012  song with Nicki Minaj "Beauty and a Beat" is back on the chart under the ARIA rules around viral songs at number five, this song is so stupid that it's hilarious...it feels like a novelty song to some degree.

The fall out of all of this is that "IloveitIloveitIloveit" by Bella Kay slumped three to number six, I am not sure about this song's future in the top ten while "Dracula" by Tame Impala slipped back two to number seven.

Also falling back two slots to number eight is "Choosin' Texas" by Ella Langley, I am mostly just shocked this song made the top ten at all!. "Ordinary" by Alex Warren slipped two slots back to number nine and finally "So Easy (To Fall in Love)" by Olivia Dean fell four to number ten.

Losers

"Swim" by BTS might be having it's last week on the chart unless something miraculous happens, it dropped another ten slots to fifty.

The only other major loser was "Pinky Up" by Katseye down six to twenty five.

Drop Outs

We saw four songs depart this week with three being sent to the On Replay singles chart with "Espresso" by Sabrina Carpenter, "A Bar Song (Tipsy)" by Shaboozey and "Just the way You are" by Milky x Mallgrab. 

The other drop out being "That's So True" by Grace Abrams.

Gains

So sadly we did see two of last week's new entries gain decently off their debuts with "Earrings" by Malcolm Todd up six to twenty eight and "Freakin' Out" by Dexter and the Moon Rocks up six to forty three.

"Just Keep Watching" by Tate McRae continues to be a pain in my buttcrack by climbing seven to forty one. 

Re-Entries

Apart from "Beauty and A Beat" by Justin Bieber and Nicki Minaj being back at number fve, "Be By You" by Luke Combs continues sto bounce on and off the charts but it's back this week at forty nine. 

New Entry

Two new entries this week, beginning with...

39. "SPEED DEMON" by Justin Bieber

So we're getting this cut from "SWAG II" and unfortunately it's not one of the better songs on that album, Bieber's vocals sound processed to hell and back and there's nothing all that impressive about what is on offer with the production here especially with a guitar line that is painfully reedy, weak and rerally doesn't sound good as Bieber croons about overcoming negativity and personal growth blah blah. Justin, the poor production and vocal performance isn't helping your case here, let's move on. 

1. "drop dead" by Olivia Rodrigo

We end the week with the number one song everyone saw coming from a mile away and likely the opening song of Olivia's upcoming album "you seem pretty sad for a girl so in love" because this is a song about having a really intense and passionate crush on somebody and the euphoria and headiness that comes with feeling that sort of infatuation with another person. It actually feels like head cannon from Olivia to some degree even though she has described the song has being about a "perfect first date" she went on.

As for the production? Well, it's a lot of warping synths, a little guitar and strings that give the song this uncanny Chappell Roan vibe that I actually like a lot and also makes sense when Dan Nigro does the production for both Olivia and Chappell and the pair have been on tour together so Olivia would probably consider somebody calling this a "Chappell Roan song" a compliment. In short, this is a good song, it's probably the best of any of the new entries we've had in the past month.

Yeah, "drop dead" by Olivia Rodrigo  is the best of the week here, it's not really a contest. Worst of the week goes to "SPEED DEMON" by Justin Bieber. 

Pretty Fly (For 1999): 25th April Protect Angel Bee of Mine and Thank 9pm

This week is going to be a long especially in terms of the new entries...there's seven of those this week however let's start with the top ten where "Baby, One More Time" by Britney Spears remains at number one but its sales are starting to slow a bit and it could find itself vulnerable. 

The challengers are beckoning too with "Why Don't You Get a Job?" by The Offspring which climbed one spot to number two, "We Like to Party (The Vengabus)" by The Vengaboys jumped three spots to number three and "No Scrubs" by TLC  which looks to have the better momentum of the three challengers as it skidattled up four spots to number four.

Of course all this could be because "That Don't Impress Me Much" by Shania Twain crashed three spots to number five and "The Animal Song" by Savage Garden down two to number sx. 

"Touch It" by Monifah remained unmoved by the chaos above it stuck at nnumber seven. "Anthem for the Year 2000" by Silverchair down thre to number eight.

What I was surprised to see was "Until the Time is Through" by Five up two into the top ten at number nine. "This Kiss" by Faith Hill slid one to number ten and thankfully looks to be done in the top ten.

Losers

So as you can imagine this week is messy so lets begin with "Heartbeat/Tragedy" by Steps which just utterly collapsed from nineteen to forty five. Former top ten hit "Jackie" by BZ and Joanne slumped from thirty to forty four.

"Last to Know" by Human Nature slipped eight to forty two while Pandora's "A Little Bit" slipped eleven to forty. 

Sadly Jennifer Love Hewitt's "How Do I Deal?" is not getting all the answers down from twenty two to thirty six. and in the loss I am surprised by,.."Changes" by 2pac lost all it's momentum to slide from number twelve to thirty five. 

"Doo Wop (That Thing)" by Lauryn Hill slumped ten slots to thirty four.

Gains

We did get some gains this week with the biggest gain of the week belonging to Eminem's "Hi! My Name Is" climing twenty spots to twenty one. "Every Morning" by Sugar Ray jumped eight to twenty three. 

Korn's "Freak On A Leash" found some more freak to gain eight spots to twenty three while The Living End are tearing up the charts with "All Torn Down" up ten to twenty six.  

New Entries

A nassuve seven new entries this week, beginning with...

50. "Put Your Hands Up" by The Black  and White Brothers

So the Black and White Brothers are an electronic duo hailing from Switzerland with this being the first snng to hit the ARIA singles chart and I'm sorry, I fucking hate this, the vocals are just nasal with nothing more than the lame "Put your hands up in the air" refrain that gets incrementally more annoying every time it is said by that neutered dog whistle of a voice over that bassline, 

We can do better than THIS! Come on..

48. "9pm (Til I Come)" by ATB

So we head to Germany for this song from DJ and producer ATB and mercifully this one doesn't hit the infernal annoyance the previous song does by actually having a dang solid guitar loop that winds up pretty catchy and the female vocals actually fit the song nicely, throw in the bassline and the song is actually pretty dang good for what is an electronic song with not much in the way of lyrics. 

Yeah, check this out, this is pretty good. 

37. "Stand by Me" by 4 the Cause

So we go from dance to r'n'b with 4 The Caause, an Illinois group that later moved to Germany and well this is exactly what you are thinking this is...a cover of Ben E. King's "Stand by Me" amd well. this is something of a mess, the hook is singing with other members repeating by rapping which hits the right point of being annoying and taking the emotion out of the song that King so carefully crafted, it sounds like a Glee performance...oh wait...Glee did this song somewhat better.  This is obnoxious...next!

33. "Honey to the Bee" by Billie Piper

Stepping back into the UK pop scene with this new song from Billie Piper who is actually involved with the next two new entries however "Honey to the Bee" is the latest single from Piper's album entitiled "Honey to the B" and you know what" If there's anything to be said about this song is that Billie does have some pipes, she sounds better on this song than she did on "Because I Want To" (that song is still incredibly obnoxious) but especially on softer songs like this one she sounds really good.

Also this song overall this song is a pretty damn good pop song even if the chorus doesn't quite pop in the way the bridge build suggest its going to and it helps that Piper is a commanding presence. The content is your standard pining love song where she's trying to convince this guy that he is meant for her that she's his honey to his bee. It's cute. Don't mind this overall. 

29. "Thank ABBA For The Music" by Steps, Tina Cousins, Cleopatra, B*Witched and Billie Piper

So this is a strange one, a bunch of established artists and groups like Steps, Tina Cousins and Cleopatra got together at rhe Brit Awards in February to perform a medley of ABBA songs beginning with "Take a Chance on Me", "Dancing Queen", "Mamma Mia" and "Thank You for the Music", now I will say they did stick wth melodies and there were no hackneyed changes apart from changing "you" to "ABBA" in "Tbank You for the Music".

However the issue with this song is the balance here, eleven women to two guys (Lee and H from Steps) and the lack of baritone that the guys could have provided is missing in the medley here. Don't get me wrong, the ladies all sound amazing and the harmonies on point. It's fine enough...nice tribute that just misses in one spot.

28. "Angel of Mine" by Monica

Swinging back to R'n'B with this song from Monica which was recorded by Eternal in 1997 and then re recorded by Monica for her second album "The Boy is Mine" and really, there's not much to say about this song. it's a pretty standard love song where Monica has found her soulmate and describes that meeting that soul mate ande' that instant pyrrhic feeling of an instant connection with that someone special over piano anf strings. Its sweet and cloying but I am not going to remember this song long term. 

27. "Protect Your Mind (Braveheart)" by DJ Sakin & Friends

We're ending the week with a song from a Turkish-German trance project DJ Sakin and friends. It's pretty much a love song that's centre focussed onsomeone who has found their "Braveheart", a warrior, who is willing able to fight for love, truth and justice and that this guy is her one true brave heart but I will say that I do like this form of trance where it blends in instrumentation from other countries like the Scotland's bagpipes and a bit of pan flute to make the song sound really evocative and majestic, it sounds almost unique!. Nice song, check it out if you are curious. 

That was our week, a long one but the worst of the week falls out easily...whatever the hell "Put Your Hands Up" by The Black and White Brothers was. I have no desire to hear that song again.

best of the week is a little harder but I am going to give it to ATB for "9pm (Til I Come)"

Top Ten Worst HIt Songs of 1994

 So in past years, I haven't had trouble putting together this list, most of the really bad stuff can be separated out quickly and dealt with as per 1992, 1996 and 2000 but this year...I had to work hard to figure out ten songs that I could even justify putting on a list of the worst hits of 1994...it's that kind of year but I did get there eventually and most of this list is just really saccharine and sappy music in pop and rock or the song just missed the mark.

A reminder of the rules, the songs must have either debuted on the 1994 ARIA singles year end chart or landed higher on the 1994 year end than they did in 1993. "Zombie" by The Cranberries is being left to 1995 as it is higher on the 1995 year end list than it is on the 1994 year end, also a song can't make this list if it's just boring...there has to be something actually wrong with the song, 

So with all that in mind, let's get this show on the road, starting with...

Number Ten

Look...I tried...but when a song as saccharine and as tepid as this is the biggest song of the year in a year as good as this one for the charts...we got a problem...

"Lovr Is All Around' by Wet Wet Wet

This cover of The Troggs song was for the movie "Four Weddings and a Funeral" and lyrically it is just the worst kind of pop music cheese in that it's not tasty or fresh but its out of date and there are visible signs of mold  starting to spread through the cheese, he feels love in his fingers and toes and from there the feeling only grows only for him to realize that she isn't really recoprocating so he throws himself at her and begs her to let her love for him show. It's this weepy, insincere song that may as well be a simp anthem for the ages, I cannot stand it. 

Number Nine

Moving away slightly from simp anthem territory but remaining completely drippy and overly saccharine....

"I Swear" by All-4-One.

Again another song toward the top of the year end chart that slipped into dippity doo, saccharine nonsense, this time a cover of John Michael Montgomery's 1993 country hit song of the same name and while the original is fine enough, John Michael has a sincerity that makes the song work however this pop cover from All-4-One has all the sincerity of a politician making a promise that they KNOW they are 100% going to break because they cannot stick by the promise...swearing by the moon and the stars in the sky is ridiculous and it sounds all completely fake insincere from the vocals. Blergh. Let's move on

Number Eight

At this point, Peter Frampton should declare a moratorium on people covering this song because nobody can cover it and do it well. 

"Baby, I Love Your Way" by Big Mountain

I am sick to death of people covering this song and wind up making a bigger mess of it than Donald Trump trying to do foreign policy, this time we got the reggae version of the song which still takes out the sisncerity of the original and replaces it with this weirdly hollow sounding song that makes me wonder if they missed the love and sincerity in the Frampton original like that god awful late 80s cover did where it was all oversold annoyance. Ugh. There was no need for this cover, Peter Frampton, I am so truly sorry. 

Number Seven

I am going to keep this one brief because just like the covers of "Baby, I Love Your Way"...there was no need for this...

"The Power of Love" by Beverly

We got two different versions of Jennifer Rush's 1985 hit "The Power of Love" and I would argue that Celine Dion made the definitive cover of this song to the point we didn't need this screechy dancefloor ready cacophony complete with gang vocals and Beverly singing "I am your lady and you are my man" with all the passion of somebody farting post dinner courtesy of being bloated, it just sounds completely insincere and awful especially when you compare it to the original. Next!

Number Six

Doing this to a great song should be sacrilege...

"Twist and Shout" by Chaka Demus feat. Pliers and Jack Radix

I absolutely adore The Beatles cover of "Twist and Shout", a song that was originally recorded in 1961 by The Top Notes, and for Chaka Demus, Pliers and Jack Radix to grab up chunks of that song for this reggae infused nightmare where it uses to "Twist and Shout" as part of a song goading a girl into having sex with him and it's gross as hell, it's the sort of song that leaves a foul taste that lingers long after the song finishes and I want no part of it. Gross.

Number Five

With this next song, I will attempt answer the titular question and explain in no uncertain terms but why we cannot talk until the song quality improves.

"Can We Talk?" by Tevin Campbell

My answer to the titular question of is no...of course...not when Tevin Campbell sounds like a whiny spoilt brat who is upset that his first crush just rejected him for a dance at the primary school disco, he sounds pathetically prepubescent when he attempts to sing or rather begs for this girl to let him talk himself into her pants which brings me to the production which sounds dated back to the late eighties or possibly early nineties because let's face it...1990 and 1991 were still furiously trying to pretend they were still in the 80s, it's a slog of a song that deserves to be forgotten so let's move on.

Number Four

For a collab featuring three of the biggest names in rock, I am truly baffled by this song and how anyone thought this song was even worthy of release. 

"All For Love" by Bryan Adams, Sting and Rod Stewart

For all the star power on this song and especially the run Bryan Adams was on wth hits in the early 90s I am baffled at how NOBODY connected to this song for the film "The Three Musketeers" couldn't think to make something that didn't sound so incredibly cheap and none of them appear to be able to harmonise especially when they all shout "ALL FOR LOVE!" amd the lyrics are just the same corny love song lyrics that just make me groan especially when they try to turn the Musketeers phrase "All for one and one for all" into their bastion of love. I have no desire to hear this song again. Blergh.

Number Three

Then again as far as bad love songs go...there's worse...like this.

"Always" by Bon Jovi

There's something about this song that feels so overly dramatic to the point that the drama feels so unearned it's almost to the point that it makes me laugh especially when the song opens up with those dramatic piano chords and Jon Bon Jovi whispering "This Romeo was bleedin' but you can't see his blood"...uh Jon, that's internal bleeding you might want to go and see a doctor for that one, he then goes on to sing that he is a fighter but wthout this girl by his side, he gives up then you aren't really a fighter, Jon...just somebody parading around like he is a prized cock but then does the whole "I can't go on" when shit gets serious. 

As if all of that is not bad enough, we get to the hook of this comedic shamozzle described as a rock song where Bon Jovi goes into full on horny yowling cat mode with "AAAANNNNDDDDD IIIIIIIIII will love you,...baby...FOR ALLLLLWAAYYYYS".

The bad lyrics just keep rolling in here, it's never ending with this song like on the bridge where he sings if she told him to cry and die for her, he would. It's just over sold nonsense and he is painting her as controlling as hell. Save this song for where it belongs which is Home and Away...not on the charts.

Number Two

Ahh so Mr Adams, we meet again *cracking knuckles intensifies*....

"Please Forgive Me" by Bryan Adams

This song is just one of those songs where again the song doesn't earn it's dramatic pathos especially if she heard "Have Ever Really Loved a Woman" and noped right out of there or that Bryan Adams is referencing the first time he and this woman hooked up in the fucking first line of the song and goes to describe their relationship as only getting better and how he is so impossibly in love with this girl which leads me to ask what he is asking for forgiveness from this girl for? Did he force himself on her or something because he is in love with this song? That question is something I wondered because the song is so incredibly boring and Adams is just reminiscing and pontificating on their first kiss and having sex for the first time. 

"Can't Stop This Thing We Started" and "A Night to Remember" are both far far better than this boring ass overtly dramatic nonsense.

Number One

It wasn't going to be anything else, this song is  profound in it's absence of anything good and hence..

"Said I Loved You...But I Lied" by Michael Bolton

I didn't want to do this, I didn't want to put a song by an artist who toward the backend of his chart making career was the butt of a lot of school yard jokes in the mid nineties from kids who thought Michael Bolton's music was for their grandparents but "Said I Loved You but I Lied" was reprehensible rght from the god damn jumping, everything about this song is wrong, starting with the insincere vocal performance from Michael Bolton and the weirdly gooey production that feels you feeling sick in the pit of the stomache to the point it makes you want to wretch over the toilet bowl especially when Bolton is comparing love to candles where love is a flame that doesn't go out in wind or rain.

This song just feels gross to even listen to, every time I hear it, I want to go jump into a tub of disinfectant and hope the ache in my tummy goes the hell away. 

It's the worst hit song of 1994 and I'm not lying about it.

ARIA Singles Top 50 Chart Review: April 20th. The one where the new entries are a cavalcade of...something...

 So the battle for the number one spot continued this week and it's about to become a three way go with the arrival of "drop dead" by Olivia Rodrigo next week and just glancing at this week's new entries...we are in for a trainwreck of a week in that regard but let's get back to the top ten where "Rein Me" by Sam Fender and Olivia Dean returned to number one basically on the margins in terms of sales and a little streaming. 

It sent "Man I Need" by Olivia Dean back to number two, it still remains a threat for the top spot but a lot is going to depend on those streaming margins against "drop dead".

All of this leaves "IloveitIloveitIloveit" by Bella Kay in a strange post as it almost feels like this song has peaked in some way given it's not makng gains on streaming anymore. 

What was surprisingly was that "Choosin' Texas" by Ella Langley did not make the ground I thought it would, the album boost really only helped this song maintain its postion. 

Speaking holding position that is the case for "Dracula" by Tame Impala at number five. "So Easy (Too Fall in Love" by Olivia Dean at number six, "Ordinary" by Alex Warren stubbornly clinging on at number seven and "Stateside" by Pink Pantheress and Zara Larsson at number eight.

Raye's "Where is My Husband" rebounded to number nine while thanks to Coachella performance and subsequent discourse "Daisies" by Justin Bieber climbed twenty six spots to number ten. 

Losers

"Sailor Song" by Gigi Perez fell nine spots to number forty seven while "Just Keep Watching" by Tate McRae turned off seven spots to forty eight.  

Olivia Dean's "Baby Steps" slipped nine to forty one while "Swim" by BTS continues to struggle to remain afloat on the chart down eleven to forty.

Drop Outs

So we have a slew of drop outs this week, let's begin with the long running songs like "APT" by Rose and Bruno Mars, "Pink Skies" by Zach Bryan and "Carry You Home" by Alex Warren.

Then there's country singles like "Be By You" by Luke Combs and "Weren't for the Wind" by Ella Langley. 

Then there's the songs that really didn't quite get going like "I Run" by HVN and Kaitlyn Aragon and "Aperture" by Harry Styles. 

Finally there's "Father" by Kanye West and Andre Troutman which will be mothballed and forgotten. 

Gains

So outside of that massive gain for "Daisies" by Justin Bieber, there was only one other major gain this week with "Manchild" by Sabrina Carpenter rising nine places to twenty six.

Re-Entries

Three new entries this beginning with "Porch Light" by Noah Kahan is back at fifty (I'd expect this to get a bigger boost with the album being released this Friday).

"House Tour" by Sabrina Carpenter is back at number forty three because of a combination of Coachella and likely because it got a video.

"Yukon" by Justin Bieber also returned at twenty three due to Coachella and the subsequent discourse around his performance.

New Entries

Five new entries this week...let's just get this over with because this is gonna fucking suck..

49. "Freakin' Out" by Dexter and the Moon Rocks

Wow, so this is a weird one this week, Desternd the Moon Rocks are a country rock act hailing from Texas, USA, yet this song in particular feels more like a weaker grunge song that could have come out in 1994/95 only this feels like a cheap Soundgarden rip off, its okay in terms of the lyrics and it might well be one of the better songs new this week.

As for the content of the song, it really doesn't dig deeper than surface level of being alone and wanting somebody to come warm them up and not freak out. Its fine but that's all it will be at best. 

46. "Pop Dat Thing" by DaBaby

Oh I see the Da Baby redemption arc has well and truly begun in the US so Australia just had to get in on the redemption arc train which gives us this pile of nonsense which amounts to DaBaby begging this girl to "Pop Dat Thing" with the thing DaBaby is referencing being his god damn dick, he isn't being shy about what he wants this girl to do which involves a combination of sitting in his lap and eventually blowing and sucking on his 'D'

Throw in the god awful canned production complete with a tinny voice going "Pop Dat Thing" and you have one of the most disposable and utterly useless rap songs of 2026...NEXT!

34. "Earrings" by Malcolm Todd

It's never a good sign when the artist involved is signed to a recording deal on basis of going viral on Tik Tok which is the story of American musician and singer/songwriter Malcolm Todd and with this being his first single to hit the ARIA singles chart I was wary especially as I had heard this song wasn't particularly good and in a week like this one...I was hoping that the horror stories weren't true and so how was it?

Uh yeah, the horror stories checked out because this is the rancid sort of song that sets the industry back twenty years because dear god what even is that arse backward production that doesn't allow anything including Todd's vocals to breathe? Or how the song is just a bunch of choruses and refrains about how earrings got lost in some girl's bed.and Todd is accusing him of being scared to tell this girl that he lost the lyrics because he isn't talking to her before finishing the "song" with "I hope you like my mixtape".

I hope this song dies a very fast death on the charts because this sucks royally/

33.  "Be Her" by Ella Langley

Of all the new songs from "Dandelion", Australia had to go and pick the worst song of the bunch to chart...yeah, I said it, this is the worst song from that album and I am absolutely stunned that it was picked to be a single because threads like a song that GirlDefined would love for what it preaches within the lyrics of the song, its basically "Dear Future Husband" except in this czse this woman has found herself a husband and is now aspiring to be the ultimate Christian tradwife who cooks, cleans, takes care of the kids and wirships Jesus just like 'her'. It's just got this icky overtly conservative vibe that makes milk curdle in my intestines every time I hear it.  I hope this doesn't stick around.

19. "Pinky Up" by Katseye

My last hope for something that might be good...oh wait, it's new song from Katseye, the female group version of Onision releasing pop atrocities and yeah, this one is no different... this is a disaster of obnoxious production that's all centred around the hook that got no chance of actually being a thing..."Pinky Up" (Talk about trying to make fetch happen). I won't say it's worse than a previous single of theirs but it's definitely the sort of song that makes your ears lose hope that they may not hear good music ever again.

That winds up our week...I am nixing best of the week this week...NONE of this crap deserves the title of "best" at all so instead I am giving out a tie for worst of the week which is going to "Pinky Up" by Katseye, "Earring" by Malcolm Todd and "Be Her" by Ella Langley...yeah a three way tie for worst...that's how bad this week was. 

At least next week brings Olivia Rodrigo...it's only up from here...we can hope.

Pretty Fly (For 1999): 18th April. My name is Blackstreet

Bit of a slower week this week which allowed for something of a reset across the chart this week but as normal for the chart right now, there's no change at the top with Britney Spears maintaining her sttanglehold on the number one spot with "Baby, One More Time" however there are some challengers looming on the horizon.

That won't be "Thar Don't Impress Me Much" by Shania Twain as this has pretty much peaked at this point but it's hanging onto number two for grim death this week, it does open up an opportunity for "Wby Don't You Get A Job" by The Offspring at number three to move past it and contend for the number one slot in the weeks ahead.

The yoyo chart performance of "The Animal Song" by Savage Garden continues, this week it's up four to number four this week, it pushed past "Anthem for the year 2000" by Silverchair which slipped back one place to number five.

"We Like to Party (The Vengabus)" by The Vengaboys remains lodged at number six while "Touch It" by Monifah slipped two slots back to number seven. 

RIsing three to number eight is "No Scrubs" by TLC which is in a great position to make a play for higher spots on the chart, it's got the best momentum of anything here.

The final two songs in the top ten are pretty well done but remained in their slots from last week with "This Kiss" by Faith Hill at number nine and "No Matter What" by Boyzone at number ten...thank god, they'll be gone soon. 

Losers

Let's move on with iour losers here and we begin with "Nothing Really Matters" by Madoona down from forty two to forty nine...this song has pretty much been a none starter. 

"When You're Gone" by Bryan Adams and Mel C is also pretty much completely done this week down sx to forty,

"Last to Know" by Human Nature slumped nine spots to thirty four this week. Bit of a shame with this song because it's a damn good song. 

Former top five hit "Jackie" by BZ and Joanne slipped ten spots to thirty this week as people have realized that they can get Jackie off their minds.

Re Entries

Just the one return this week which came for "Got the Life" by Korn which returned at number forty eight.

Gains 

Only one major gain this week with "Enjoy Youtself" by A+ up ten spots to twenty six. 

New Entries

Two new entries this week, let's start with...

41. "Hi! My Name Is" by Eminem

The second single from The Slim Shady LP coming from Eminem who is otherwise knwn as Marshall Mathers III and hails from Missouri, this song features a rather well used sample of Labi Siffre's 1975 song "I Got The..." and togerther producer Dr Dre, Eminem has made an utterly hilarious song where in the first verse he asks kids if they like violence and if they want to see him put nine inch nails through each of his eyelids before saying he has to get his head straight as he cannot figure out which Spice Girl he wants to impregnate!

There's also some really interesting and thoughtful reflections on growing up that I appreciate a lot and the bars here do connect...this is a pretty damn good song. Check it out.

21. "Girlfriend/Boyfriend" by Blackstreet feat. Janet Jackson

Ending this week with a pretty clunky song from American R'n'B group Blackstreet bringing on pop legend in her own right, Janet Jackson and I have to be honest here...I hate this, yeah the interplay is nice but Janet sounds like she is fighting through the layers of production just to be heard here especially with that percussion that's slathered at the front of the mix. It's just not satisfying enough to warrant any more attention. I'm going to forget this exists.

It's worst of the week with the best of the week going to "My Name is" by Eminem. 

 

ARIA Top 50 Singles Chart. 13th April. The one where Australia continues "Choosin' Texas" in the top ten

So I am grateful that this week's chart is a bit slower,n no new entries and a bunch of songs re-entering this week mostly because this week's "Pretty Fly (for 1999)" is A LOT this week (seven new entries) and this week is a bit of a slow down with Ella Langley likely to have some impact next week however lets get straight to our top ten where "Man I Need" by Olivia Dean returned to number onem ow this is absolutely on its incredible streaming strength because the bottom has gone out of sales for this song, it's losing ground there fast.

Which might well open the way for Sam Fender and Olivia Dean to return to number one with "Rein Me In" which slipped back to number two, it's doing better on sales and if it can bridge that streaming margin than it can make a play for number one.

It seems like "IloveitILoveitIloveit" by Bella Kay has stalled out at number three, this is it's fourth consecutive week at number three and it's not really looking like making a push for higher spots which leaves it vulnerable to our big top ten gainer this week "Choosin' Texas" by Ella Langley which climbed six places to number four, this song is killing it on sales and just needs a good streaming uplift and this can absolutely make a play for number one. Hey Twitter stans, looks like the song you dismissed as a "local" hit is now a global hit. 

From there 'Dracula" by Tame Impala slipped one back to number five, the same goes for "So Easy (To Fall in Love)" by Olivia Dean to number six.

Unfortunately "Ordinary" by Alex Warren held firm at number six, that was not the case for " Stateside" by Pink Pantheress and Zara Larsson which slipped two spots to number eight. 

Finally both "Raindance" by Dave and Tems and "Where is My Husband" by Raye both fell one spot to numbers nine and ten respectively.

Losers

We did see some big losers this week with "Aperture" by Harry Styles down ten slots to forty nine, it could be out nex week.

"Father" by Ye and Travis Scott down twelve to forty two while "Swim" by BTS continues to fall away down ten to twenty nine.

Drop Outs

No real surprises with the drop outs this week with "All the Love" by Ye and Andre Troutman, "Potch Light" by Noah Kahan, "Click Clack Symphony" by Raye and Hans Zimmer ad "Body to Body" by BTS all gone.

Gains

"Sailor Song" by Gigi Perez got a ten place boost to number thirty eight while "I Had Some Help" by Post Malone and Morgan Wallen climbed eight to thirty three.

Those two were the only big gains this week.

Re-Entries

Four returns this week and they are all older songs with "Carry You Home" back at fifty for Alex Warren. "Pink Skies" came over at number forty seven for Zach Bryan. 

Sadly "Manchild" by Sabrina Carpenter back at forty six and "APT" by Rose and Bruno Mars returning at number forty two.

That wraps our week with there being no new entries. Next week is probably going to be Ella Langley and Katseye...sadly.

Pretty Fly (For 1999) 11th April. Tearin' Up Electricity Til Time Is Through for No Scrub

 We have a LONG week here...seven new entries and the top ten continues to be whatever it is mostly because the top two didn't change with "Baby, One More Time" by Britney Spears keeping the number one slot ahead of "That Don't Impress Me Much" by Shania Twain at number two.

However a new player for the top is emerging in the firm of "Why Don't You Get a Job" by The Offspring which jumped from eleven to number three, this has momentum on it's side big time as it blasted past "Anthem for the Year 2000" by Silverchair which slipped one to number four, 

"Touch It" by Monifah continues to climb much to my disgust, it's back up one spot to number five this week. 

The Vengabus has stalled! "We Like to Party (The Vengabus)" by Vengaboys is stuck in neutral at number six and is facing a threat from "Changes" by 2Pac which climbed two spots to number seven.

The rest of the top ten took dips this week with "The Animal Song" by Savage Garden down three to number eight, "This Kiss" by Faith Hill down two to number nine and finally "No Matter What" by Boyzone sliding five spots to number ten.

Losers

"Big Big World" by Emilia took a big big dump down eleven to be on the cusp of leaving the chart at number fifty. 

Chef's "Chocolate Salty Balls" have hit their used by date so they down ten slots to forty three wbile people have realized that "Nothing Really Matters" by Madonna doesn't really matter so it dived seven to forty two. 

Nobody's got the feeling with Five as "Got the Feelin'" just utterly collapsed from twenty eight to forty one. 

"Whiskey in the Jar" by Metallica is nearly three quarters empty in the chart jar as it dived nine spots to forty. 

People are tired of hearing about "Miami" from Will Smith clearlly as it skidattled eleven to thity eight. 

"When You're Gone" by Bryan Adams and Mel C is done as it slipped nine to thirty four while "How Do I Deal" by Jennifer Love Hewitt slipped nine to twenty six. 

Gains

We didn't have all that many major gains with the biggest gain of the week belonging to "Smile 'n' Shine" rising, smiling and shining all the way from forty seven to twenty nine. 

Honeyz follow up "End of the Line" rose six to twenty four.

Re-Entries

Just the one return with George Michael and Mary J. Blige collab "As" back at forty nine.

New Entries

Seven new entries this week, beginning with...

46. "Cigarettes Will Kill You" by Ben Lee

So I am going to be honest here...i am not a huge Bwn Lee fan, his voice can come off a little abrasive but here it does kind of work for the song especially wuth that repettive piano loop and Ben sliding closer to grunge in his vocal tone. The thing that is probably the most interesting about this song is the content where Lee frames the song around toxic relationships throough the lense of having a cigarette and how too much of a toxic habit will eventually kill you much like how a toxic relationship kills the people within it. Good song. 

39. "Electricity" by Something for Kate

Keeping the Australian flavour going, we have the latest for Something for Kate and this song is pretty dang great! I love the lyrics that focus on the breaking the limits of what humans can do in terms of wishing to move faster and find more energy and speed rather than be constrained being human, I guess it's more a thought of being more than a human being with superpowers? I also love the energy in the production that just radiates from the guitarwork here. Damn brilliant song, check it out!. 

33. "Freak On A Leash" by Korn

Was not expecting Korn, of all bands, to show up on the charts but here we are. "Freak on a Leash" is a single from the album 'Follow the Leader" and yeah, this is about as nu metal as it gets. I am not really a fan of distortion in music generally but it works fine here for what it is and the lyrics from Jonathan Davis that go into not allowing others comments and opinions to shape who he is or what he can be in the world. It's not really to my taste but hey, if nu metal and crunchy guitars that shred are your thing than check this out.

27. "Tearin' Up My Heart" by NSync

The firsr of two boy band songs to appear in the new entries this week with this one being the second single from NSync's debut album and I actually like this one more than "I Want You Back" more because the hook feels catchy and there's a resonance to the lyrics about where he is confused by this relationship which he knows is in trouble but he is unsure about whether to stay or go and it's slowly tearing him apart while she's witholding a decision on the relationship. It's a solid enough song that's got a better foundaton than "I Want You Back" so I'll take it.

22. "Strong Enough" by Cher

The follow up to "Believe" has arrived and sadly i am not really as much of a fan of this as I would like to be, the production feels way too elegant in some ways for a woman saying she's strong enough to move on without a deadbeat man who is sleeping with another woman in her life. At least, "Believe" worked for the dancefloor, this one feels more like an empowerment anthem that sounds scarcely believeable., not buying it. 

15. "Until the Time is Through" by Five

The latest single from Five and I think this one might be the best of the singles so far, it's less brash or abrasive as "If Ya Gettin' Down" and there's no forced rapping to be seen here, it's a gorgeous ballad wheree the group for a change sound great and there's none of that ridiculous rapping that has made them sound awful on previous singles but this hits the spot for its earnestness even if the idea of a couple staying together forever is a bit over reaching to some degree, still this is pretty cute. 

11. "No Scrubs" by TL,

We fimish off the week with the latest single from American R'n'B group TLC and they are back with a message for all those lazy blancmage men who are sponging off them, they are done with "scrubs" llke them and they won't tolerate getting with a guy who doesn't have a bit of cash to flash in his wallet and all three ladies can sell the attitude convincingly however Lisa "Left Eye" Lopes really is the best part of this song with her rap verse, it's punchy and nails the point. I also love the strings on this song. Good song, check it out.

That wraps our week and what a long week it is. Worst of the week is going to "Strong Enough" by Cher...it's the weakest of the songs here. Best is going to "Electricity" by Something for Kate. I really did like that song. 

ARIA Singles Top 50 Chart Review. 6th April. The one where we no talk about THAT guy.

 So this week surprised me in some ways, we got a new number one that I am incredibly excited to write about and we have a litany of movement to deal with so let's dive into the top ten where we have our first new number of 2026 and it's a first for the lead artist and the second for the featured artist...it's "Rein Me In" by Sam Fender and Olivia Dean, now make no mistake here, this is was absolutely won on the margins here because this sure as hell is not dominating in any of the sectors be it sales, streaming or Youtube but it did just enough to take the number one however this is not a strong chart topper by any matter of means.

It does leave the door open for "Man I Need" by Olivia Dean, which slipped back to number two this week, to return to number one considering it's strength on streaming. It did stay ahead of "ILoveitILoveitIloveit" by Bella Kay which remained at number three week despite a good week on streaming this week. 

Up three to number four is "Dracula" by Tame Impalawhile "So Easy (To Fall in Love)" by Olivia Dean remains at number five and "Stateside" by Pink Pantheress and Zara Larsson is on hold at number six. 

"Ordinary" by Alex Warren rebounded one slot to number seven because this song refuses to go away. "Raindance" by Dave and Tems climbed one spot to number eight.

An album boost saw Raye's "Where Is My Husband" climb two places to number nine while rising five places to be our sole new arrival to the top ten it's "Choosin' Texas" by Ella Langley at number ten. 

Losers

" Body to Body" by BTS slipped twenty slots this week to forty six while "Swim" sank fifteen places to nineteen. 

"Porchlight" by Noah Kahan saw it's light dimmed eight places to forty while "Aperture" by Harry Styles also did an eight place skid to thirty nine.

Drop Outs

None of the drop outs are that surprising with BTS and Harry Styles album tracks gone alongside "The Visitor" by Sienna Spiro and"Sleepless in a Hotel Room" by Luke Combs

Maybe the only song of this departing crew that might make the year end is "DTMF"  by Bad Bunny.

Gains

No real major gains this week, combination of new entries and returns keeping this at a minimum with the gains. I guess the biggest would be that gain for "Choosin' Texas" by Ella Langley into the top ten that I have already mentioned.

Re-Entries

Two returns this week witb "I Run" by HVN and Kaitlyn Aragon at fifty and "Just Keep Watching" by Tate McRae back at number forty five.

New Entries

So this week means I have to deal with the Kanye West conundrum because of our four new enties, two come from West's new album, I instigated a policy when West released the two previous albums that I would not cover any track that charted because of the way Kanye has behaved and that policy going to remind in place, yes, I am aware he has apologised but proof will be in his actions not in the words he says. I am also not obliged to give Kanye any kind of platforn,

So the two songs that did chart from Kanye are "Father" with Travis Scott at thirty two and "All The Love" feat. Andre Troutman at thirty three.

Moving on the other two new arrivals, he start with...

49. "Ween't For the Wind" by Ella Langley

Si I have been expecting more Ella Langley songs to show up given the success of "Choosin' Texas" so I am not surprised to see this song here and I think I'd be fine wth this song picking up even more traction bbecause this is really a damn solid song even though...yeah it's a bit compressed (it's Music Row production...what do you expect?) but there's something about this song that feels really homespun and like this is something that is coming from Ella's heart. 

It;s a sibg about somebody who isn't able to stay in the one place for too long and this is that person reflecting on that journey and just floating wherever the wind takes them. Damn good song, check it out if you are curious

42. "Click Clack Symphony" by RAYE feat. Hans Zimmer.

The only song from RAYE's new album "This Music May Contain Hope" to hit the chart this week and I am kind of sad about that given I think Raye deserves better than the crumbs she is being handed and this song really isn't one of the best cuts from the album...although its still decent, I just wish the song settled down a groove and melody because it just swerves from right to left and every which way with it's sound which I guess could be a part of the part. It's fine enough but I'd rather see "I Know You're Hurting On" on the chart over this.

That was our week wth "Weren't for the Wind" by Ella Langley taking best of the week. Worst of the week is between the two Kanye songs,,,you can choose which one as I have no desire to listen to unfinished music from a man who doesn't deserve anymore real attention.

Pretty Fly (For 1999). 4th April. End of the Line so Smile 'n' Shine!

 Kind of an abortive week at hand here, we've only got the two new entries to deal with but there has been a bunch of movement on the chart this week just not in our top three so let's get to our top ten where for yet another week it's "...Baby One More Time" by Britney Spears riding steady at number one and continues to hold off "That Don't Impress Me Much" by Shania Twain at number two and "Anthem for the Year 2000" by Silverchair at number three.

Now where things get interesting is outside of that top three because back up to number four is "The Animal Song" by Savage Garden which rebounded one spot this week, it was followed by "No Matter What" by Boyzone which unfortunately continued it's rebound from last week up one to number five.

However the worst news inside our top ten is the rebound from number ten to number six for "Touch It" by Monifah...ugh...really?

At least all of that had the benefit of pushing "This Kiss" by Faith Hill down three to number seven while jumping ten slots into the top ten is "We Lke to Party (The Vengabus)" by The Vengaboys to nimber eight...definitely wasn't expecting this song to do so well but hey, the hook is catchy even if the constant refrain of "Weliketoparty" is annoying.

Then we have two other new arrivals to our top ten with 2pac's "Changes" jumping from forty two to number nine, another great song and I do love the sample use while "Heartbeat" by Steps is also into the top ten up five to number ten. 

Losers

Alright so let's deal with the big fallers this week and we start with Korn's "Got This Life" which slipped nine spots to forty three while "Pretty Fly (For a White Guy" by The Offspring is heading toward jumping off the chart cliff at speed down from twenty eight to forty two. 

Now for the fall I am absolutely delighted about which is that "DooDah!" by Cartoons slipped ten spots to forty one this week. I cannot wait to see the back of this song. 

"Believe" by Cher is also headed for the exit after a wonderful run down from twenty one to thirty eight. 

Human Nature's "Last to Know" slipped nien to number twenty three which is kind of sad because it's a really good cover. 

Re-Entries

One return this week with "Enjoy Yourself" by A+ returning at number twenty nine

Gains

So we havr quite a few good gains outside of our top ten, let's start with Dru Hill's "How Deep Is Your Love" up from thirty six to eighteen this week. 

"You Don't Know Me" by Armand Van Helden feat. Duane Harden had a nice ten place gain to nineteen.  

Will Smith's "Miami" has been having a weird chart run, this week, it's up thirteen to twenty seven while "Every Morning" by Sugar Ray up twelve to thirty two.

"What It's LIke" by Everlast got a nice boost from forty seven to thirty four and "Praise You" by Fatboy Slim is up six to thirty six

New Entries

Two new entries, starting with...

47. "Smile 'n' Shine" by Pandora

So both new entries today are follow ups to previously successful songs, this one for Swedish singer Pandora was originally released in 1997 and is only just charting now in Australia and honestly? I'd be surprised if this one takes off as much as "A Little BIt" did given this song isn't quite as catchy as that song was and this song doesn't work to Pandora's strengths as a vocallist either. I don't know. It's that bad but it's not a song that I am willingly going to go back to either. 

30. "End of the Line' by Honeyz

We finally got the follow to Honeyz hit "Finally Found" and I think I might like this one a lot more than "Finally Found", there's just more to this song in the production and the group sound great with the harmonies as they beg this guy to make up his mind about the relationship either tell her to leave or show that he wants her to stay because the relationship has hit the end of line line and he needs to be a big boy and make a decision. Unfortunately i don't see this being as big as "Finally Found",,,that song has a really good hook but it would be nice if it sticks around. Check it out.

Yeah, it's also the best of the week. The worst of the week is going to "Smile 'n' Shine" by Pandora...it just doesn't work for me like her previous single did.

ARIA Top 50 Singles Chart Review: 30th March. The one where it's a mess.

So I apologise if I come off as grumpy this edition of the ARIA Singles Chart Review, some if it is due to in real life stuff and some of it is due to the sudden turn to...well...you'll see it was something of a rough week...we got a mini album bomb from the new BTS album "Arirang" which I do have opinions on which we'll get to but lets deal with the rest of the chart first where for yet amother week "Man I Need" by Olivia Dean continues to hold sway at the top, this song is still a titan on streaming and it's not going to be pushed off the top spot easily.


As I said last week, I don't think the compettion is going to come from "Rein Me In" by Sam Fender and Olivia Dean which remains glued to number two however "IloveitIloveitILoveit" by Bella Kay, which remained at number three, is fighting "Man I Need" for dominance on streaming right now and I can see it pushing it's way past "Rein Me In" in the weeks ahead.


There;s a new entry at number four courtesy of "Swim" by BTS in the first sign of "Arirang" having some impaxt on the chart even if it's not going to last which probably means there's a chance for "So Easy (To Fall in Love" by Olivia Dean holding steady at number five and "Stateside" by Pink Pantheress and Zara Larsson down two to number six to rebound next week...we'll see.


Tame Impala's "Dracula" rose one to number sevn this week while "Ordinary" by Alex Warren slipped one back to number eight and "Raindance" by Dave and Tems" held firm at number nine.


finally returninig to the top ten is "Golden" from K-Pop Demon Hunters up two slots, this will not hang around, it's more likely an Oscars boost.


Losers


The continued losses for the Harry Styles album continued as "Taste Back" dropped fourteen slots to number thirty seven, "Aperture" down nine to thirty one and "American Girls" fell six out of the top ten to number twelve. '


Outside of that "DTMF" by Bad Bunny fell seven to forty.


Drop Outs

So if you are wondering where the rest of the Harry Styles songs that didn't drop out last week are, they are here alongside "Just Keep Watching" by Tate McRae and "I Run" by HVN and Kaitlyn Aragon.


Gains

Not much in the way of big gains this week with "Birds of a Feather" by Billie Eilish up six to tirty four and "Manchild" by Sabrina Carpenter also up six to thirty six.

Re-Entries

So this where the impact of Luke Combs album "The Way I Am" comes into play because he has two of the three new entries courtesy of "Sleepless in a Hotel Room" at forty seven and "Be By You" at number thirty nine. 

The third return is the now habitual return of "I Had Some Help" by Post Malone and Morgan Wallen at nnumber forty four. 

New Entries

We have five new entries total this week but because we're somewhat in album bomb territory for BTS, I will only cover the songs in the top twenty so with that..."FYA" at forty eight, "Hooligan" at forty six and 'Body to Body" at twenty six.

This means we're starting our new arrivals with...

41. "The Visitor" by Sienna Spiro

Time fot another piano led ballad from Sienna Spiro and yeah, it's another boring as hell dirge that sounds like ass where she's bitching that she's just some temporary thing everytime in a relationship with a man. This isn't as bad as "Die On a Hill" but this sure as hell is basic and honestly, I really struggle to care at all about this.

4. "Swim" by BTS

So the biggest problem with BTS's new album is the production just how much it just sounds like it was done on the cheap given how thin a lot of it sounds but that isn't even the biggest problem with this song which is the actual single from the album, the biggest issue with this song is that it feels derivative of The Kid Laroi circa 2021 complete with the same sort of vocal delivery as Laroi, this is just completely forgettable rather than outright bad. BTS are capable of much better than this. 

No best of the week, I am giving worst of the week to "The Visitor" by Sienna Spiro for being uninspired dirge. 

Pretty Fly (For 1999) 28th March: Last to Know Me So Why Don't You Get A Job?

 So this is the kind of week where its just as expected, there's this weird stability about the top four of the top ten and the new arrivals to the chart are more or less what is expected including one new debut in our top ten which we will get too but let's begin at the very top where Britney Spears still reigns courtesy of "Baby, One More Time", it's a comfortable number one at this point ahead of "That Don't Impress Me Much" by Shania Twain stuck at number two, "Anthem for the Year 2000" by Silverchair at number three and "This Kiss" by Faith Hill mercifully remaining glued to number four (frankly if this song climbs any fucking higher the temptation to scream will be too fucking great)

Then we have two songs rebounding after losses last week with "The Animal Song" by Savage Garden up one to number six and "No Matter What" by Boyzone somehow up three spots to number six...yeah, I am getting annoyed with how much the latter is sticking around. 

"Lullaby" by Shawn Mullins continues to be rocked to sleep at number seven while "Have You Ever" by Brandy climbs three places to number eight.

Now we get to our new entry at number nine and one I am going to have something to say about a bit later in this blog, it's "Why Don't You Get a Job" by The Offspring. This song has a huge chance of climbing higher in the weeks ahead so we will have to keep a watch on this song.

Finally in pleasing news. Monifah's "Touch It" slipped five spots to number ten. Good riddance to bad rubbish!

Losers

Nobody's moving to "Body Movin'" by Beastie Boys so that swan dived ten spots to forty eight this week while "Goodbye" by Spice Girls is heading toward the exit down from thirty nine to forty six.

Will Smith's "Miami" slipped eight to forty this week. Kind of sad this song wasn't  bigger...it's actually a pretty good song.

Dru Hill is finding out the public's love of "How Deep is Your Love" is not very deep so it's down twelve to thirty six while Madonna's "Nothing Really Matters" doesn't seem to care it fell ten to thirty two.

Former number one and this year's blog retrospective anthem "Pretty Fly (For A White Guy)" by The Offspring is on its way out as it tumbled from thirteen to twenty eight but we do have that new Offspring song to talk about. 

Gains

Our small group of gains are actually decent...I guess...Green Day's "Time of Your Life (Good Riddance)" climbed nine spots to thirty nine and apparently people can't get enough of Chef's "Chocolate Salty Balls" so that's up six to thirty.

The one gain that absolutely sucks an unbelieveable amount of ass is "DooDah!" by Cartoons which climbed from it's debut of forty seven last week to number thirty one this week and no, that is not good news. 

Re-Entries

We do have the one re-entry this week courtesy of Jennifer Paige's "Crush" which came back at number fifty. Don't mind because while it was a hit in 1998, it's a damn great song. 

New Entries

Four new entries this week beginning with...

47. "What It's Like" by Everlast

So Whitey Ford aka Everlast is an American, singer, rapper and songwriter, he was also a member of House of Pain but given what this song about, I will not be making comment on House of Pain's "Jump Around" here but focus on what "What It's Like" is about with its strong focus on people having empathy for those doing it tough and to not judge somebody going through a nightmare like being homeless through no fault of their own and I do like the pretty damn solid guitar lick and how the song is able to weave three stories in to send it's message. Good song, check it out if you are curious. 

29. "You Don't Know Me" by Armand Van Helden feat. Duane Harden

So two Americans team up here with pruducer Armand Van Helden teaming up with vocallist Duane Harden for what is actually a pretty good slice of New York house music with a somewhat glossy touch that kind of works in the song's favour in bringing the city club vibe to the song which feels somewhat appropriate given the song is about overcoming others judgements and reminding them the individual is something more than just superficial perceptions by others. Check it out if you are curious.

14. "Last to Know" by Human Nature

So this is the only pop song we're covering this week and it comes from Australia's own Human Nature and it's a cover of a song from 90s r'n'b group Color Me Badd (the band I tore apart for the atrocious "I Adore Mi Amor" back during Good 1992 Vibrations) and while the original felt a little too bare bones, Human Nature amp up the pop with some spare guitar, some keyboards and harmonies to question why they are the last find out why their partner isn't giving them the affection they should because they are giving that affection to another person. It's not better than "Cruel" (that song is a high water mark for Human Nature to me) but its certainly good, give it a spin. 

9. "Why Don't You Get A Job" by The Offspring. 

We run out the week with The Offspring's follow up to "Pretty Fly (For a White Guy)" and I am going to say this, this song can be a bit obnoxiious thanks to that vocal delivery but again just like with "Pretty Fky (For A White Guy)", "Why Don't You Get A Job?" is a hilarious repudiation of those who sit around at home spending other people's momey without ever actually earning a dollar themselves. One poor dude has to lose his gold digging girlfriend "in the worst kind of way" with the response being that he should stop handing over his hard earned on the hook. Goofy ass song but well worth checking out.

Nothing that really warrants worst of the week so I am nixing that for this week however as for best of the week? Tight go but I think I am going to give to "Last to Know" by Human Nature...yeah it's a cover but I'm a sucker for boyband harmonies. 

ARIA Top 50 Singles Chart Review: 23rd March

 This is a settle down week as the chart recalibrated following the Harry Styles album bomb last week and with a limited impact likely from BTS next week, we'll see how things play out however nothing is getting in the way of Olviia Dean's "Man I Need" which racked up another week at number one to break the record for the longest running non Australian chart topper and really...it's a margins game given the gap has closed on streaming. 

Which brings us to "Rein Me In" by Sam Fender and Olivia Dean which remains stalled at number two and is coming under heavy pressure from "IloveitIlloveitIloveit" by Bella Kay up one to number three after having spent the week at number one on Spotify streaming. 

Rising one spot to number four is "Stateside" by Pink Psntheress and Zara Larsson, also up one is "So Easy (To Fall in Love)" by Oliva Dean, these gains can be explained through "American Girls" by Harry Styles slipping three spots to number six. 

Remaining steady at number seven is "Ordinary" by Alex Warren because this song just clings on and on like an unremovable stain. 

For the first time since 2024, there's an Australian song in the top ten...shame it's "Dracula" by Tame Impala, it climbed seven points to hit the top ten for the first time in it's chart run.

"Raindance" by Dave and Tems is back in the top ten rebounding two spots to number nine while Raye 's "Where is My Husband" slumped two to number ten but should rebound soon courtesy of the release of her upcoming album. 

Losers

ALL the big losers are from the Harry Styles album bomb so let's blast through these quickly "Carla's Song" down nineteen to fifty, "Dance No More" has started grooving spots fifteen spots to forty four, people continue to not listen to "Are You Listening Yet?" as it's stumbled seventeen to thirty nine while "Pop" has well and truly popped down fourteen to thirty six, "Coming Up Roses" actually wilted eleven spots to thirty two, "Ready, Steady, Go" false started down eighteen to thirty one, "Taste Back" lost it's taste so down nine to twenty three while "Aperture" slumped twelve being out of focus to twenty two. 

Drop Outs

the rest of the Harry Styles album account for the drop outs this week with "The Waiting Game", "Season 2 Weight Loss" and "Paint by Numbers" departing the chart. 

Gains

Given everything else that wasn't Harry Styles moved up, I am going to focus only on those songs that had double digit gains this week, we start with Ella Langley's "Choosin' Texas" which finally got a good boost this week up ten slots to number sixteen as Australia finally decide to make this song a hit which is fine by me.

What I am not fine with are the continued gains for "White Keys" by Dominic Fike which climbed another ten places tp twenty and looks to have streaming traction...geezus...I know we're short of guys doing nicely in the pop mainstream but we do not need this!

"Fever Dream" by Alex Warren rebounded eleven spots to twenty four while Milky and Mallgrab's "Just the Way You Are" jumped ten spots to thirty.

Re-Entries

So we have two re entries this week with the first of those being "Die With A Smike" by Lady Gaga and Bruno Mars at number forty seven and the other being "Midnight Sun" by Zara Larsson back at number thirty four.

New Entries

Just the one new entry this week so let's talk about...

29. "Porch Light" by Noah Kahan

I have been so disappointed in the performance of the lead single "The Great Divide" mostly because that song really grew on me something insane but anyway we have the follow up single with it almost completely along the same lines as the previous single with this person Kahan is talking too having gossip about their health spreading all over the internet and how this person is tearing thier life apart even if Kahan's vocals are not at all impressive on this song. It's fine enough but he has done better. Meh.

That wraps our week, likely a bunch of BTS and maybe Luke Combs next week but we'll have to see. 

Pretty Fly (For 1999) 21st March. Every Morning As a DooDah Doodah

 So I am going to skip the preamble again this week mostly because I do have a bit to do in real life and I still have three year ebd lists that I need to write and get out however it's also a good thing that the top ten didn't change all that much with "...Baby, One More Time" by Britney Spears remaining a dominant number one.

"That Don't Impress Me Much" by Shania Twain just cannot bridge the gap and remains at number two, similar applies for the next four songs, those being "Anthem for the Year 2000" by Silverchair, "This Kiss" by Faith Hill at number four. "Touch It" by Monifah at number five and "The Animal Song" by Savage Garden at number six. 

The movement happens in the lower half of the top ren with "Lullaby" by Shawn Mullins up two slots to seven, it helped push "Jackie" by BZ and Joanne back one slot to number eight.

"No Matter What" by Boyzone rebounded done spot to number nine while "Doo Wop (Dat Thing" by Lauryn Hill slipped two places to number ten. 

Losers

"Tender" by Blur is feeling a bit tender this week after getting bashed ten slots to forty two. 

People have stopped sticking Chef's "Chocolate Salty Balls" in their mouthes and sucking them so it's down from twenty nine to thirty six. 

Emilia's "Big Big World" is actually becoming smaller, smaller as it shrunk eight to thirty one/

Five's "Got the Feelin'" has lost some feeling down ten slots to twenty nine. 

Gains

Thrilled to see "Changes" by 2Pac up eight slots to twelve this week. The party is kicking into gear for The Vengaboys as 'We Like to Party (The Vengabus)" climbed twenty two spots to fourteen.

"Fly Away" is unfortunately taking off for Lenny Kravitz up eight to eighteen while Dru Hill's "How Deep is Your Love" is realizing the love for that song is truly deep up ten to twenty four. 

The New Radicals are getting what they give with "Get What You Give" rising from forty one to twenty e

Finally Propellerheads "Crash!" jumped from forty nine to forty one. 

New Entries

Three new entries this week beginning withh...

47. "DooDah!" by Caetoons

First up is a Danish band called Cartoons and...oh dear god... this is basically a dance version of "Campdown Races" just with vocals going "Everybody sung this song, doo dah doo dah". Its Eurodance trash that is the epitome of annoying and obnoxious as hell, it's even missing the fiddle or banjo that could have given this song some country vibes, instead it's just chintzy and somewhat crappy attempt at Eurodance. Skip it!.

45. "As" by George Michael and Mary J. Blige

So this is a collaboration that I was not expecting on any kind of level, ome of the biggest pop acts of the 80s and 90s collaborating with American r'n'b star Mary J. Blige, I was interested in how this would turn out and rurns out its a smoother r'n'b love song with prominent finger snaps with George and Mary trading verses on the song, I actually really like this as they both sound awesome and there's some decent chemistry here. My only nitpick is the lack of harmonies on the hook and it can feel like it's being shouted at me which is not something I tend to like in music but otherwise good song!

43. 'Every Morning" by Sugar Ray

Third single from the album "14:59" and this on the surface sounds like some of the most breezy pop rock ever with that guitar riff that is at least memorable and the vocal delivery sounds light almost to a level comedic but these lyrics are dark, it's about this girl cheating on him and all that happens when somebody commits infidelity and when there is a temptation to cheat. I actually don't mind this, I do like the guitar lick and the vocal delivery here. I've heard worse in this vein

So that means best of the week is awkward but Ill give the edge to "Every Morning" by Sugar Ray. Worst of the week is not so hard...that's going to "Doo Dah!" by Cartoons...I hope that song does not become a thing because geezus fucking christ. 

ARIA Top 50 Singles Chart Review: 16th Match The one where I'd rather be listening to anything else...

So yeah, the Harry Styles album bomb for "Kiss All the time. Disco Occasionally" did happen and honestly while I do not like the album I am grateful for the disruption it caused on the chart even if it didn't get as far as disrupting our current runaway number one which yet for another week is "Man I Need" by Olivia Dean, now it just absolutely rules streaming to a ridiculous degree at this point, it really doesn't even need sales or Youtube to keep the number one.

It held up over "Rein Me In" by Sam Fender and Olivia Dean which remained at number two, mostly because streaming and sales took a bit of a dip this week and it just didn't have enough to compete with "Man I Need". 

The first sign of Harry Styles impact is at number three with "American Girls" entering the chart. More on this song later but this song is here thanks to decent rather than outright impressive streaming.

Rising three spots to number four is "IloveitIloveitIloveit" by Bella Kay, this song is getting some serious streaming traction now, whether or not it challenges 'Man I Need" remains to be seen. 

All of this pusbed the next four songs down two places, those being "Stateside" by PinkPantheress and Zara Larsson at number five, "So Easy (To Fall in Love)" by Olivia Dean at number six, "Ordinary" by Alex Warren at number seven and "Where is My Husband" by Raye at number eight,

Rising three spots to return to the top ten is "12 to 12" by Sombr at number nine and finally rising twenty eight spots to number ten on the back of the album bomb is "Aperture" by Harry Styles (I still fundamentally hate this song).

Losers

So we had a whole raft of double digit losers this week beginning with the ten place slide to forty seven for "Manchild" by Sabrina Carpenter...I cannot wait to see this song gone permanently from the chart.

I also don't mind that "I Run" by HVN and Kaitlyn Aragon slipped eleven spots to forty six...I can live with this song disappearing too...just quietly.

Justin Bieber's "Daisies" took a thirteen place wilting to forty four while "Birds of a Feather" by Billie Eilish lost ten places to forty three like wise for "A Bar Song (Tipsy)" by Shaboozey which slumped ten to forty two,, 

"Baby Steps" by Olivia Dean got sat on it's bum down thirteen to forty one while "Just the Way You":by Milky and Mallgrab got a thirteen spot disfiguring to forty. 

Sombr's "Undressed" is nearly naked down thirteen to thirty nine while "DTMF" by Bad Bunny slumped nineteen to thirty seven (it's done well to be on the chart this long). 

Sieena Spiro's "Die On this Hill" hopefully will die off the charts as it slumped eleven to thirty six and "Fever Dream" by Alex Warren got a cold wet wipe to the face as it suffered a fifteen place drop to thirty five.

A rough week for Olivia Dean continued as "A Couple Minutes" dipped eleven to thirty four while "Opalite' by Taylor Swift got booted eleven to thirty three.

"Homewrecker" by Sombr got wrecked eleven spots to twenty.  

Drop Outs

So I am going to do the drop outs this way:

Gone and not coming back are "Deadline" by Blackpinkm "4 Raws" by EsdeeKid and "Be By You" by Luke Combs

Might come back with album release: "The Great Divide" by Noah Kahan

Might return should streaming return for them: "Nuevayol" and "Baile Involidable" both by Bad Bunny, "Midnight Sun" by Zara Larsson. "Let Alone the One You Love" by Olivia Dean. 

Long running hits that should have been gone ages ago but will probably return: "I Had Some Help" by Post Malone and Morgan Wallen, "Sports Car' by Tate McRae and "Die with a Smile" by Lady Gaga and Bruno Mars.

Gains

Outside of "Aperture" returning to the top ten thanks to the album dropping. The only other gain was for "Dracula" by Tame Impala up two to fifteen.

New entries

We are in album bomb territory for Harry Styles so I am only covering the best, worst and what made the top twenty this album is not interesting enough to cover the whole damn thing) so "Paint By Numbers" painted itsself in at thirty eight, "Carla's Song" is being sung at thirty one, "Dance No More" stalled at twenty nine, "The Waiting Game' waits to plunge next week at twenty seven,  "Pop" at twenty four and "Coming Up Roses" sprouting at twenty one. 

So that still leaves us with a meaty porton of this Harry Styles album to cover..unfortunately beginning with...

22. "Are You Listening Yet?" by Harry Styles

These reviews are going to be quite short because there's only so much you can say about an album that gives you very little to say except to call out the "Harry only wishes he could make music as good as LCD system and this one might be the worst example of this yet with the badly blended instrumentation not fitting in with anything on the album including the random guitar and hand claps while Harry sings "Are You Listening Yet?" repeatedly because he thinks that is what passes for a hook these days. Blergh. Never want to hear this again. 

13. Ready, Steady, Go" by Harry Styles

At least this song has a pulse and a bit of energy that doesn't make me want to turn it off and actually listen to LCD Soundsystem and Harry Styles actually seems to have an energy to his voals that is barely present on most of these songs and there's a nice guitar lick that really works at least until the sound effect on the song annoy me enough. Look, there are elements of the production that annoy me but I'll take this...its one of the better specimens on this album. 

12. "Taste Back" by Harry Styles 

The problem with this album is that it's more an LCD Soundsystem worship album that feels very devoid of any actual personality from Harry Styles if you cna hear him at all over the the production because half the time he sounds like he recorded the vocals in a nearby council toilet as the production reminds me a lot of one of the more dramataic Sega Megadrive games made for 2026. The song goes on about somebody reappearing in Harry's life and I am sorry but this isn't interesting or justifiies the annoyingly bad production on the vocals. Next. 

3.  "American Girls" by Harry Styles.

We bring this exploration of Harry Styles new album to a close with the second single and really, almost got to ask why because this really isn't anything other than LCD Soundsystem worship again complete with garbage vocal production, seriously..whoever was responsible for Harry recording thi song from possibly his toilet  or the bathroom should be fired immediately then again maybe when the song revolves around his friends dating American girls, it's probably better to ignore how banal the lyrics or bettter yet? Go and actually listen to some fucking LCD Soundsystem instead.

That was our week and boy that sucked,worst of the week is going to "Are You Listening Yet?" becaus I just cannot stand that song. "Ready, Steady. Go" gets the best of the week for being somewhat decent rather than just boring. 

Next week,, probably Noah Kahan. 

Pretty Fly (For 1999): March 14th. Enjoy Tender Shazam Changes

Let's not waste any time here and jump straight into things beginning wth our top ten and nothing really changed with our top two with "...Baby, One More Time" by Britney Spears holding station at number one ahead of "That Don't Impress Me Much" by Shania Twain holding steady ar number two,

Rebounding two positions is Silverchair's "Anthem for the year 2000" to number three while "This Kiss" continues it's inexecrable run up three to number four. 

Speaking up inexecrable runs, Monifah's "Touch It" climbed twelve spots this week to number five because that's what the charts need...not. 

All this caused "The Animal Song" by Savage Garden to slide three to number six while "Jackie" by BZ and Joanne recovered one spot to number seven. 

"Doo Wop (Dat Thing)" by Lauryn Hill jumped two places to number eight. Finally, 'Lullaby" by Shawn Mullins stumbled three spots to number nine and "No Matter What" by Botzone fell one to number ten. 

Losers

The hits of 1998 are making their way out slowly but surely with "Hands" by Jewel losing it's grip down nine to fifty.

"Finally Found" by Honeyz is slowly finding it's way to the exit down eight spots to forty seven while "Time Of Your Life (Good Riddance" by Green Day has had the time of it's life on the chart but it fell ten spots to forty four.

"Slide" by Goo Goo Dolls lived up to its name sliding nine to thirty eight while "Body Movin'" by Beastie Boys slipped seven to thirty seven. Meanwhile Spice Girls continue their "Goodbye" tour down ten to thirty five. 

The biggest story though is that Cher's "Believe" collapsed out of the top ten down seven to eleven this week. 

Gains

So I already mentioned the big gain for "Touch it" by Monifah and outside that we only saw one or two other big gains...just a shame most of them aren't on the good side, "Fly Away" by Lenny Kravitz flew smoothly from forty three to twenty six. 

I guess points to "We Like to Party (The Vengabus)" by The Vengaboys which climbed nine to thiry six. 

New Entries

Five new entries this week, beginning with...

46. "Shazam!" by Spiderbait

Always nice to start the week's reviews with an Aussie act, this is the lead single from Spiderbait's lead single from their fourth album "Grand Slam" and its a fucking slapping banger of a song that doesn't let up from start to finish with it's fuzzy guitars, drums and handclaps which makes senses when it's considered that the song is about smiling and breaking free of feelings of being overwhelmed by dancing and smiling. Damn good song, nice to kick things off on a positive note. 

32. "Tender" by Blur

Another lead single this time from British band Blur, I was curious given how abrasive yet catchy "Song 2" was but turns out that this song is about the break up of Damn Albarn's relationship and all ip is a pretty vulnerable song that really hits some bittersweet notes especiallt with the gospel touches aroound the song and the interplay between Albarna dn Graham Coxon, Again, this is another pretty good song that is worth your time. 

31. "Enjoy Yourself" by A+

Switching from rock to hip hop for these next two songs and the first song we're dealing with is from American rapper going by the name A+ and this song sampling "A Fifth of Beethoven" by Walter Murphy which was a prettry sizeable Billboard Hot 100 hit in 1976 with the content of the song being about having fun and living it up while they are young...its fine enough if you want some dumb party music. Check it out. 

20. "Changes" by 2Pac

So this might be bit a more complex but bare with me here, this song was recorded in 1992 before being remixed and released for 2pace's Greatest hits record in 1998 with the remix including a US r&b group called Talent who somehow don't get a featuring vredit on this but anyway I do love the cleverly flipped sample of 1986 hit "The Way It Is" by Bruce Hornsby and The Range as 2pac raps about the struggles of African American communities where police brutality, racism, poverty etc are prevalent and 2pac urges unty and personal responsibility while urging change in how black communities in the USA view and treat each other. It's an incredibly emotional song and my god it hits hardl. Check this out!

15. "Nothing Really Matters" by Madonna

The final single from Madonna's successful "Ray of Light" album and I have to be honest here I am not really all that impressed with Madonna's vocals fighting through layers of effects but she does sound good here, strident as she sings about finding fufillment and joy in motherhood and love rather than in her fame and public image. If it weren't for some of the more more egregious effects, this is also pretty good,

That was our week and wow, I am nixing worst of the week here because nothing here is worthy of that slot however "Changes" by 2pac is getting best of the week because yeah that song hitsin a way nothing else here does, 

ARIA Singles Top 50 Chart Review: 9th March

 I am a bit torn about whether to say this is a good or bad week because what does it truly matter with a likely Harry Styles album bomb (and given how forgettable the album is, I am not looking forward to covering that in any case) on the way but we do have a reasonable week here so let's start with the top ten where for yet another week "Man I Need" by Olivia Dean keeps the number one spot, it's just a monster on streaming tight now that not even Harry Styles can get near at this point. 

It held up over "Rein Me In" by Sam Fender and Olivia which held on to number two but with it's streaming already seemingly on the downward slide, its going to come under some pressure from "Stateside" by Pink Pantherress feat. Zara Larsson which climbed a massive eight spots to number three this week but Harry Styles next week might curb some of that momentum for this song. 

So as a result we saw "So Easy (To Fall in Love)" by Olivia Dean fall back one to number four, "Ordinary" by Alex Warren back one to number five and "Where is My Husband" by Raye slipped one spot to number six.

The second big arrival to our top ten is "IloveitIloveitIloveit" by Bella Kay which raced up thirteen places to number seven, this song has some momentum behind it, it will be interesting to see what happens to this in the weeks ahead post Harry Styles bomb.

An album boost saw "I Just Might" by Bruno Mars rise six spots to number eight,

All of this saw Sombr's "Homewrecker" slide three spots to number nine and "Raindance" by Dave and Tems down two to number ten, 

 Losers

So we do have a chunk of songs that lost hard this week like "Let Alone the One You Love" by Olivia Dean which slipped eight to forty eight and "4 Raws" by EsDeeKid which tumbled twelve spots to forty seven. 

Sadly, "The Great Divide" by Noah Kahan had one of the biggest losses of the week down fourteen places to forty four, sad about that one because it's a really damn good song and deserves better. 

We also had some losses for songs that are country or country adjacent with "I Had Some Help" by Post Malone and Morgan Wallen down seven to forty three and "Be by You" by Luke Combs down eight to forty two. I wouldn't mind if the Post Malone and Morgan Wallen song left already...it's had a great run and really is just clogging room on the charts at this point.

Closing in on the end of it's lap is "Victory Lap" by Fred Again, Skepta and Plaque Boy Max down seven to thirty six and while "I Run" is running in the run direction for HVN and Kaitlyn Aragon down seven to thirty five,

Drop Outs

Four songs dropped out this week and I am not really complaining about any of thhese to a degree with "Tit For Tat" by Tate McRae, "Sapphire" by Ed Sheeran, "I've Seen It" by Olivia Dean and...yet again.."Good Luck, Babe1' by Chappell Roan. 

Gains

Not much in the way of big gains outside our top ten although "Neuvayol" by Bad  Bunny up twelve spots to thirty four.

What I was disappointed with is the nineteen place gain for "White Keys" by Dominic Fike to twenty nine. Australia, seriously, we can do better than this nasal discharge.

Re-Entries

Just the one return this week with "Baile Involidable" by Bad Bunny back at forty nine. 

New Entries

Three new entries, starting with...

30. "Go" by Blackpink

Look, be glad that nothng else from Blackpink's recent EP broke through this week because it could have been so much worse than this and even then, "Go" isn't exactly anything to write home about, "Go" still features unnecessary noise that takes away from the song and it's not helped that Blackpink just sound incredibly nasal and like they have colds or something. As i said, it's probably one of the better songs on "Deadline" but that is about it. 

20. "Fever Dream"  by Alex Warren

My views on Alex Warren are mixed while I don't hate "Ordinary" with anywhere near the energy others have reserved for the song but its definitely become a song I have grown sick of and if "Eternity" had of made the year end list for 2025 than that would have made my worst hit songs list however I do like "Bloodline" with Jelly Roll so I was hoping this song was more "Bloodline" than "Eternity" and yeah...I think we got there! 

There's a bounce to the production on this song that makes it feel summery even though we're now past summer in Australia even if the lyrics are a bit naff, he is having this fever dream where he is seeing this girl everywhere  and knows he is damned if she loves him and damned if she doesn't, it plays a bit in dicey territory but I'll take it, it's one of his better efforts.

13. "Risk It All" by Bruno Mars

Bruno Mars just releasing his latest wedding song from his new album and I do find it interesting that this is the only new song from this album to hit the singles chart this week but we did get this pretty sweet piano ballad that throws in a latin flair (inspired by Bad Bunny, Bruno) thanks to the horns as Bruno declares he'd risk everything for this woman in his life with a sincerity that seems genuine enough. I like it. Check it out if you are curious,

That's our week. Best and worst fall out easily enough, I am going to give worst of the week to "Go" by Blackpink and the best of the week to "Risk It All" by Bruno Mars, it's just slightly better than "Fever Dream" by Alex Warren. 

Next week...yeah...Harry Styles album bomb...yay?