Top Ten Best Hit Songs of 2021

Well now we get to the list that's always the hardest for me that being the top ten best hit songs of any given year...yeah I work from what makes the ARIA singles year end for the year but there's also combing through the list, finding the songs that ruled my year and than figuring out where each song fits on some subjective list for the sake of this blog and truth be told, I was sorely tempted to drop the whole idea of a top ten because really in 2021, there was A LOT of good music that made the ARIA year end for 2021..when I can pull a seolid 21 good to great songs out as contenders for this list and have headaches ordering then I guess even with how transitional popular music felt in terms of trends last year. 

Anyway let's get to the rules for this list.

1. A song can only make this list if it debuted on the year end for 2021 or is a 2020 year end song that's higher on the 2021 list

2. A new rule here due to the ARIA year end being constantly full of old songs so if a song is older than 2020 and debuting on the year end list for 2021 then it's eligible for honourable mention only as i don't think it's fair for older songs to make the top ten and I think the top ten should reflect the music released in 2021. 

3. This my list, my opinion so please don't abuse me in the comments.

So moving on to our six honourable mentions and right off the bat, it's time for controversy because...

"My Ex's Best Friend" by Machine Gun Kelly feat. Blackbear

Somewhere along the line it became cool to hate on Machine Gun Kelly and honestly...I've never ever felt that way toward him...yeah even for that awful collab with Camila Cabello back in 2017 and all the other douchebag things he has done, I've mostly been ambivalent toward him however this infectious slice of pop/rock wormed its way into my heart in 2020 thanks to MGK's album "Tickets to My Downfall" and I'm absolutely thrilled that this became a hit because this is a bewildered MGK trying to figure out his complicated feelings on relationships and rebound relationships...even Blackbear does better than usual here (he is the worst part of that new Avril Lavigne song) and the song is short enough so that the listener doesn't get sick of it. Love it!

"Leave Before You Love Me" by Marshmello feat. Jonas Brothers

Ohh, I know this one is also going to be controversial but this song kind of hits akin to "It Ain't Me" by Kygo and Selena Gomez in terms of artists I don't care for coming together to make a really good song and that's the case here with Marshmello finally producing a song where he gets out of his own way in the production booth and the Jonas Brothers do a really damn solid job of selling a song where they are warning this girl that she's going to fall in love and end up getting hurt if she doesn't leave the club now. Nice job by both acts.

"Montero (Call Me by Your Name)" by Lil Nas X

I think the controversy that surrounded this one with the music video and the shoes kind of made people forget that this song is actually pretty damn good, it's the moment that Lil Nas X completely shed his image as the guy who made that ubquitous 2019 meme song and told the public in no certain terms that he is more than taking that horse down Old Town Road injecting many LGBTIQIA+ themes into his debut full length album and this song is almost the centrepiece of that where Lil Nas X tells his lover that he doesn't want to be on the downlow with regard to his sexuality and also addresses the pressure he feels to represent the LGBTIQIA+ community in the music industry and that really takes a heck of a lot of guts to do and it's damn great song to boot. More Lil Nas X later on this list.

"Drivers License' by Olivia Rodrigo

Word of warning, you are going to be seeing plenty of Olivia Rodrigo on this list and that's mostly because I do think Sour is a really damn good album, yeah, its centred around her teenage heartbreak but it's not like its coming from a 25 year old woman who is five or six years past teenagerdom, Olivia is actually a teenagerr and this year put her emotions and energy into a song all about her excitement about finally getting her drivers license and being able to drive to see her boyfriend only he isn't there and is likely cheating on her which is something that angers and devastates Olivia because she's very clearly still in love with the asshole in question as evidenced by the line "I still fucking love you, babe", the only reason that it's not on the list proper is because there were a heap of really damn good songs that pushed above it.

"Deja Vu" by Olivia Rodrigo

The suspicion I have about this song is that people backed away from it because it sounded a little weird and s little too experimental coming from a teenager who had just released the massive break up ballad yet here's "Deja Vu" a slice of pop rock that had all these little quirks in the instrumentation as Olivia asks if her ex is having moments of deja vu when he takes his new girl out to do all things he used to do with Olivia, it's not quite angry but more wistful as Olivia remembers all that stuff she and the guy did together and hopes he does too...either way this song grew on me A LOT in 2021. Good stuff.

"Dreams" by Fleetwood Mac

The fact that this made the year end for the first time in 2021 is mindblowing to me however even if I didn't have my rule with regard to older songs on the year end in place, this still would have been only an honourable mention...yeah it's a damn great song and Stevie Nicks is an amazing performer however combine this song being on the singles chart all year along with the cover by Jolyon Petch and I got tired of the song pretty damn quick combine that with the fact that Fleetwood Mac have better songs than this in their cannon. I still love "Dreams" but boy, am I ready for a break from it.

Now to the list proper....

Number Ten

So before I saw the ARIA singles year end for 2021,  I was all set to put this guy's Billboard Hot 100 number one on this list, that was until the year end was released and I saw that this other song of his had made the year end and what a delight it is...

"Martin & Gina" by Polo G

I was shocked this made the ARIA year end so much so I screamed with shocked delight when I saw it as it didn't feel like that much of a hit but my god I am happy it's here. Polo G is one of the newer acts in hip hop along with Rod Wave that I really keep an eye on and let me tell you "Martin & Gina" is excellent mostly because it subverts the expectation that it's going to be another luxury brag rap where Polo G goes on about he can afford to spend thousands on buying his girlfriend jewellery and whatever the hell she wants but rather to rap about the ups and downs and give and take of their relationship over this really nicely textured guitar and while "Rapstar' was close to the list, I like to think "Martin & Gina" is the song that made Polo G one of the best up and coming rappers in hip hop.

Number Nine

2021 was the year I spent saying that SZA deserved so much better from her label and basically from everyone around her, when she releases songs like this one, can you blame me?

"Good Days" by SZA

2021 was the year that I got what makes SZA a compelling R'n'B artist, she's got such a wonderful command of her atmosphere to create a song that brings its own sonic world to life with it, it's a song that's just so gentle and relaxing that it makes you forget that world is in a pretty terrible state right now and then there's SZA who is seeking to have more good days and moving on from the bad things that happened in her past eg: bad relationship and letting go of the awful things that have happened to her in the past. It's just really vibey, inspiring song which is rare to find these days especially in the mainstream but I think this song got there for me. Can we get that new SZA album this year? It's about god damn freaking time and....SZA DESERVES BETTER!

Number Eight

So remember my worst list when I criticised Keith Urban's "One Too Many". Turns out he is appearing on the best list too...

"Love Songs Ain't for Us" by Amy Shark feat. Keith Urban

Okay, so this isn't fully on Keith Urban here, "Love Ain't For Us" is actually Amy Shark providing a really damn good vocal performance where the production on the vocals for once also works wonders plus it makes sense that this song is an Ed Sheeran co write given the lyrics of the song but the song does deserve it as the song is a bare bones ballad about how sometimes no love song describes feelings between two people even if the relationship sits at a crosspoint where they not friends or lovers but somewhere between. It's definitely one of those songs to be played toward the end of a school dance or party. Check this song out.

Number Seven

So I was all set to put Lil Nas X's most recent hit on this list but as that one missed the ARIA year end, I took a moment, relistened to this one and well...

"Industry Baby" by Lil Nas X feat. Jack Harlow

Let me say this, if Lil Nas X didn't have the bucket loads of charisma, a song like this doesn't work at all and that instrumentation is grand and actually fits in quite well with Lil Nas X clapping back at those who dare hate him especially after the controversy around the "Montero (Call Me By Your Name)" video and the shoes.and he does so brilliantly using his charisma to chop his haters down to appropriate sizes...you'd kind of hope the haters now realize that Lil Nas X will leverage their hate and turn it into hilarious promo for his music but then Jack Harlow shows up to deliver one his best verses of his career...his whole verse is just absolute gold

" don't clear up rumors (ayy), where's y'all sense of humor? (Ayy)I'm done makin' jokes 'cause they got old like baby boomers
Turned my haters to consumers, I make vets feel like they juniors (juniors)
Say your time is comin' soon, but just like Oklahoma (mmm)
Mine is comin' sooner (mmm), I'm just a late bloomer (mmm)
I didn't peak in high school, I'm still out here gettin' cuter (woo)
All these social networks and computers
Got these pussies walkin' 'round like they ain't losers"

It's damn brilliant and a sure sign that Lil Nas X and Jack Harlow will be well worth keeping around for a long time 

Number Six

So this next song is a 2020 song that thanks to Triple J's Hottest 100 and it's second place ranking behind "Heat Waves" by Glass Animals, it charted on the singles chart high enough and long enough to make the year end and that song is on this list...

"Booster Seat" by Spacey Jane

This was a song that put a smile on my face every time I heard it during 2021, it's the sort of song that you play while on a long drive on a freeway during summer with the windows down and that guitar that starts the song bringing this chill vibe even during the heat of summer with Spacey Jane singing about being in the booster seat of a car. 

It also helps that that chorus is one of the best of the year with a song that actually builds up into the chorus rather than dropping down which is something I don't hear enough of in modern music these days...the chorus is supposed to be the central part of a song...build up to it rather than build down. This is just as anthemic as 'Booster Seat" was last year. Definitely check this out. 

Number Five

The best way to describe Ed Sheeran's year last year was mixed, sure, he has two hit songs with both making ARIA"s year end but specifically to find the Ed Sheeran song making this list, you need to go back to the end of 2020 to find it and thus...

"Afterglow" by Ed Sheeran

I never cared for "Bad Habits" and while "Shivers"  did grow on me, it just didn't do enough to make this list (tough competition this year and being merely decent was not enough) but it was the paired back and folky "Afterglow" that hit the Ed Sheeran sweet spot for me this year, its the sort of quietly great song that was needed coming out of an awful year that made me feel better about a lot of things and gave me hope for the next year (that really only kind of turned into an almost carbon copy of 2020 with lockdowns etc) and while Ed Sheeran hasn't definitively explained what the song is about, some have determined that the song maybe a love song to his wife but for me, "Afterglow' became the song for letting go of the bad shit and moving forward with the good. Great song, Ed.

Number  Four

Well what's a 2021 year end best list without this song on it?...

"Leave the Door Open" by Silk Sonic

Some of you will be surprised at how low this is on my list but the truth is that I love other songs on "An Evening With Silk Sonic" just that little bit more however even with that this is still a damn fantastic song with Anderson Paak and Bruno Mars knowing what makes this sort of retro 70s soul go down smooth and easy with the audience and knowing the bounds of good taste with lyrics enticing this young woman into their home by leaving the door open for her should she decide to come over for a romantic evening...and yeah, given how good this song went down in 2021, I was up for it. 

Number Three 

So with the previous song and the next three songs, they were all automatic picks for this list for me and given I think this song will make the best hit songs lists for 2022 in the US, I'm glad I can add it to this list for 2021...

"Easy On Me" by Adele

So many people said upon hearing "Easy On Me" that it wasn't a lead single song and yet I'd argue that it's the perfect lead single especially given everything that has happened, this is Adele taking the decision to end her marriage and begging her ex and her son to go easy, she did what she had to do to find herself again as the love in her marriage had gone and she realized she and her ex were staying together for the sake of their son which didn't make Adele happy. What I love about this song is that it's just Adele's vocals, a piano and some strings...that's it...all ttat's left is Adele's incredible ability to knock a song like this out of the god damn park with her charisma. Fantastic song.

Number Two

So when I was formulating my plans for my 2020 year end best hit songs list this particular song was going to be my number one best hit for 2020 so colour me sad and disappointed when it didn't make the year end for that year but thankfully due to it's ridiculous longevity, it made the ARIA year end for 2021 and so...

"Levitating' by Dua Lipa

Yeah, the asshole that is Father Time kinf of did a bit of a number and the DaBaby feature and subsequent controversy over his big mouth kept this from the top spot with regard to me placing this  but if you strip away all that outside noise and focus on the original version of "Levitating" (which made the year end rather than the remix), it's still a damn GREAT pop song, it's got just enough of those 70s grooves but doesn't go the whole way to feel like a pastiche to the past and Dua Lipa has got that effortless charisma to make the song just sound like an absolute party. It's great fun and in a year like this one, this song was the relief I needed but there was one song that connected for me like nothing else in a year where things in the world stopped making sense so what could it be.

Number One

So let's talk about music made by teenage girls...more specifically pop/rock that dives more toward teenage angst something that Avril Lavigne and others cornered in the early part of this new mess of a millennium so bring on a year like 2021 where pop/rock and pop punk is making a return to the spotlight combine that with a teenage girl's messy relationship break up and you get this...

"Good 4 U" by Olivia Rodrigo

I never could understand the criticism of Olivia Rodrigo's writing her debut album about her relationship break up, after all she is writing about something she has lived through, worked through feelings on and is now pulling from the break up for her music which is absolutely what Taylor Swift and so many other artists before Olivia Rodrigo have done and 'Good 4 U" is a highlight on "SOUR" where Olviia manages to sound righteously sarcastic and angry even though she's losing her dignity over this douche moving on with another girl without caring about Olivia and making sure that she is okay. 

And it's that lack of care from her ex that sparks the undignified rage from Olivia that works so well against the guitars that I have missed in popular music for years and the drums do a lot here to help keep the song in balance. 

Oh yeah, this song features the best two seconds in pop music where Olivia yells "LIKE A DAMN SOCIOPATH" and for all of that...it's the best hit song of 2021,

ARIA Singles Top 50 Top Ten/Chart Review: 31st January: Lots Of Elephants Pushing Light Switch and P

 So this week the Triple J Hottest 100 made it's impact and really it wasn't as wild as I thought it was going to be but it did trigger some changes in our top ten so let's start there because we have a new and old number one with "Stay" by The Kid Laroi and Justin Bieber returning to the top spot for a fifteenth week mostly thanks to streaming that got boosted through the Hottest 100.

It pushed former number one "Cold Heart (PNAU Remix)" by Elton John and Dua Lipa back to number two as it couldn't go with "Stay" on streaming while the switch was also a body blow to "abcdefu" by Gayle which slipped back to number three...yeah it's sales are excellent but streaming hasn't matched the sales growth and I'm beginning to wonder it's run for number one is done at this point.

Holding steady at number four is "Heat Waves" by Glass Animals as it held off a challenge from "Industry Baby" by Lil Nas X and Jack Harlow who rode a wave of streaming thanks to Triple J and the Hottest 100 to bounce back up six places to number five.

Also rising is "Do It To It" by Acraze feat. Cherish jumped two to number six (who actually is listening to this? Seriously)

All of this pushed 'Shivers" back two places to seven and "Bad Habits" likewise to number eight both for Ed Sheeran.

The next two are courtesy of the Triple J Hottest 100 with "Good 4 U" by Olivia Rodrigo rebounding  seven places to number 9 and the highest new entry of the week coming from childrens group The Wiggles with "Elephant (Trple J Like A Version)' which entered at number ten thanks to sales and streaming...I don't expect this to stay in the top ten and the indication is that this will likely fall out of the top ten next week.

Gains

So let's look at what else gained big outside the top ten and there's "Happier Than Ever" by Billie Eilish which jumped 14 spots to number 16, "Drivers License" by Olivia Rodrigo up 22 to 28 and "Need to Know" by Doja Cat up 9 to 40...all three of these gains can be attributed to Triple J's Hottest 100

Re Entries

Just the one re entry this week with "On My Knees" by Rufus Du Sol back at 22 thanks to the Hottest 100. 

Losers

There were some heavy losses this week so I'm going to limit it to just the double digit losses because there were a lot of songs that took hits this week to keep this reasonably short so we start with "Moth to a Flame" by Swedish House Mafia and The Weeknd down 10 to number 38 (it really wasn't a good week for The Weeknd) then there's "Better Days" by Neiked and Mae Muller featuring Polo G skidding down 11 to number 35. 

"One Right Now" by Post Malone and The Weeknd slumped ten spots to 32. Post Malone recently annouced his new album called "Twelve Carat Toothache" is coming sometime this year. "Save Your Tears" by The Weeknd is crying down ten to 33 while "Sacrifice" by The Weeknd plunged 14 to number 27.

Drop Outs

And again there's more The Weeknd here with both "Take My Breath" and "Is There Someone Else?" gone, they took with them "Acapulco" by Jason DeRulo, "Overpass Graffiti" by Ed Sheeran (disappointing as I like that song) and "All Too Well 10 Minute version (Taylor's Version)" by Taylor Swift.

Honestly that last song had a pretty impressive run that shouldn't be sneezed at.

New Entries

We got four new rather eclectic entries this week and unfortunately we are getting off to a bad start because...

36. "Pushin' P" by Gunna & Future feat. Young Thug

No, I am not doing this. I am not going to even bother dignifying this absolute piece of trash trap song where you can absolutely tell nobody is trying and when Gunna claims that this girl is not a lesbian but a 'pesbian' which appears to be lazy effort to make his p (which stands for pussy by the way) work within the song but no much like that whole Gunna album, this is utter JUNK...next.

 

34. "Lots of Nothing" by Spacey Jane

Oh this is much better. Great to have Spacey Jane back on the charts and even better with a pretty good song as this song brings in guitar that sounds really breezy and is totally consistent with their previous output but I also really like the content of the song as well with the song about dealing with the parts of yourself that you don't like and how it can feel like you are seeing those traits as part of a whole other person which I actually think is pretty interesting in terms of psychology and I can actually connect to some of those feelings expressed in the song so yeah this is absolutely worth hearing, check it out if you are curious

24. "Light Switch" by Charlie Puth

Well, I am surprised it's taken this long for Charlie Puth to return to the charts given he has been releasing scattered singles since 2019 that haven't had any impact at but with this song being from his upcoming album "Charlie" so how is the song? I don't know tbh, I definitely don't hate but I'm not sure I love it either, there's a solid groove which I do like and a melody that works but I am not a massive fan of that somewhat whispered vocal delivery that Puth uses here as it doesn't match the song's energy, it's not bad but it's certainly not good either which is a bit worrying because of the four new entries this week, I suspect this is the only song that will stick around.

10. "Elephant (Triple J LIke A Version)" by The Wiggles

So this was voted the number one song on the Hottest 100...a cover of Tame Impala song by children's group The Wiggles which on paper really just shouldn't work AT ALL and yet...it somehow works better than it has any right to especially as they manage to sneak in a bit of "Fruit Salad" in the middle of the song which makes it all the more infectious and fun so yeah I'm happy this debuted so damn high.

However it's not getting the best of the week because I just like "Lots of Nothing" by Spacey Jane just that little bit more. Worst of the week falls out easy because that's going to "Pushin' P" by Gunna and Future feat. Young Thug for being the musical equivalent of junk.

Next week..I don't know because New Music Friday was a bit weird...I guess it might be the fallout of all of this but we'll find out when the chart updates on Friday at 5pm AEDST

Lookin' Fine '89. 29th January: Nobodys Tucker's Perfect Daughter with that Orinoco Flow

 So this week wasn't really all that interesting, the top half of the top ten stalled and our new entries are...well...you'll see however let's get on with the top ten where for yet another week, "Kokomo" by The Beach Boys remains at number one and unfortunately it's got a tight vice like grip on the top spot with strong sales.

People still haven't gotten past the Scott and Charlene wedding so "Especially For You" by Jason Donovan and Kylie Minogue remained at number two because it's not catching "Kokomo" on sales at all at this point.

Then there's "Teardrops" by Womack & Womack clinging to number three, The Traveling Wilburys at number four and "If I Could" by 1927 at number five.

As I predicted last week, Mental as Anything did take advantage of some weaker songs to rise two places to number six with "Rock and Roll Music"

The song with some consistent momentum is "I'm Gonna Be (500 Miles)' by The Proclaimers which rose three to number seven...it's going to be making a play for number one in a few weeks with the momentum it's got. 

It moved past "The Only Way is Up" returned to living up to it's name by jumping up one place to number eight but' it's coming under pressure from "She Makes My Day" by Robert Palmer which rose from 16 to number nine which is just wild to me!

Transvision Tramp hit the top ten up two places to number ten with "I Want Your Love"

Gains

I am pretty happy to see "Two Hearts" by Phil Collins jump eleven places to 16 and "Oange Crush" by R.E.M rise from 49 to 38 following it's debut last week but apart from these two there were no other major gains this week.

Re Entries

This week saw the return of  "Always With Me, Always With You" by Joe Satriani at number 47

Losers

Alright let's do what we normally do by starting down at 50 because there was a seven place drop there for Rick Astley's "SheWants toDance With Me". Daryl Braithwaite's "All I Do" slumped eleven to 49. 

Michael Jackson's "Smooth Criminal" is not having such a smooth ride on the charts as it slipped from 29 to 35 this week.

Then there's Kylie Minogue's "Je Ne Sais pas Pourquoi" which fell eight places to 34. 

"Sweet Child O' Mine" turning sour for Guns 'n' Roses down ten spots to 28 while Jimmy Barnes cover of "When a Man Loves a Woman" slumped seven to 27. Jason Donovan's 1988 hit "Nothing Can Divide Us" got divided nine places to 24.  

Bobby McFerrin's chipper "Don't Worry, Be Happy" started to do the Start Worry, Be Nervous because it tumbled from 7 to 14 this week while ?Put a Little Love in Your Heart" by Al Green and Annie Lennox fell five places to 11 and that's a surprise fall...didn't see that one coming...

 New Entriea

Four new entries this week, most of these in pop...starting with...

42. "Nobody's Perfect" by Mike + The Mechanics

I just looked at the song title and the artist involved and groaned...seriously...songs called "Nobody's Perfect" or "Human" have a habit of being obnoxiously insufferable however this song is taken from "Living Years" and is the follow up to the massive hit in 1988, "Living Years" Mike + The Mechanics  oh wow...this is incredibly annoying with the production on the verses with it sounding like somebody hitting glasses on the verse before it stops for a by the numbers hook about how none of us are perfect all of the time so in other words this is generic as all hell trash. 

37. "Tucker's Daughter" by Ian Moss

So here we have the debut solo single from former Cold Chisel vocalist and guitarist Ian Moss and features a co write from fellow former Cold Chisel member Don Walker on "Tuckers Daughter" with it being the lead single for Moss's debut album "Matchbook"

So how is the song? Honestly if there was a pop/rock song to completely sucker you in, it's this one with Moss telling the story of a farm labourer realizing that his employer's own daughter is attracted to him but he doesn't reciprocate those feelings and musically that guitar that brings you in and the hook is a monster, this is going to be massive this year. Damn good song, nice way to start that solo career

20. "Orinoco Flow" by Enya

I've been dreading this one mostly because I've never cared for the sort of somewhat not quite ethereal new age thing she's got going in her music but none the less this is a song from her second album "Watermark" so how is the song? I mean it's your stock standard Enya song where it takes googling to understand what she's singing before the hook launches into the repetitive 'sail away' otherwise this music that could cure insomnia...next!

18. "You Got It" by Roy Orbison

The late great Roy Orbison is back on the charts thanks to "You Got It" being the first single from his completed album "Mystery Girl" and I got to say this was really pretty quickly following Orbison's death in 1988 which kind of makes me worry about the quality of the song so how is it? 

Of course it's damn good! You really think I'd doubt a song written by Orbison, Jeff Lynne of ELO and Tom Petty now? It's this gorgeous upbeat guitar driven pop song that still holds dear to some of the trends of the 60s but that only serve to make the song endearing and when the song is basically Orbison throwing himself at the feet of this girl letting her know that if she ever wants anything, he will provide it for her and yeah this song just leaves you with a smile for days especially as the hook is incredibly catchy.

But it's not taking best of the week because "Tucker's Daughter" by Ian Moss is getting that. As for the worst...well that's going to "Nobody's Perfect" by Mike + The Mechanics.

ARIA Singles Top 50 Top Ten Chart Review. 24th January. Encanto's Bruno in Top Ten and Frank Ocean's back on the chart

 So after last week's chaos, the fall out this week felt busy but not to the point where it feels chaotic, want evidence of that? Look at our top ten where "Cold Heart (PNAU Remix)" by Elton John and Dua Lipa spent an eighth week at number one thanks to good sales and streaming however there might a challenge from an old rival soon...I'll explain in a bit.

"abcdefu" by GAYLE remains at number two and honestly I'm not sure about it's prospects of getting to number one, sure it's the sales leader this week but streaming hasn't really taken off for this song in the way that would propel it to the top spot because streaming is the thing both "Cold Heart (PNAU Remix)" and one other song we'll get to have over it.

Now this where the challenger for number one comes in because at number three is "Stay" by The Kid Laroi feat. Justin Bieber. Thanks to Triple J's Hottest 100 where this song is a contender for the number one spot on that countdown, it could get enough of a streaming boost to return to the top of the ARIA singles chart next week.

Still holding it's postion inside the top ten is 'Heat Waves" by Glass Animals at number four while "Shivers" by Ed Sheeran moved up one to number five pushing "Bad Habits" by Ed Sheeran down to number six.

Holding it's place this week is Adele's "Easy On Me" at number seven...I expect this fall out of the top ten in the weeks ahead. 

Moving back up to number eight is "Do It To It" by Acraze feat Cherish because junk like this somehow deserves to be in the top ten which probably could also be said of one of two new arrivals to the top ten..."Where Are You Now" by Lost Frequencies feat. Calum Scott up to places to number nine because it's got traction on streaming...lovely...not.

The second of our new arrivals to the top ten is "We Don't Talk About Bruno" by The Cast of Encanto...this song is gaining strength on streaming, I can only see it going higher.

Gains

Ugh. Almost EVERYTHING gained this week as The Weeknd's album bomb last week receded so I am going to going through the songs that gained 7 or more spots this week.

In great news this week, "Edamame" by bbno$ feat. Rich Brian climbed eight spots to 25 this week however I am not so thrilled "The Motto" by Tiesto and Ava Max climbed 16 places to 26 or that "We Run The Night" by Havana Brown rebounded nine places to 39. 

Then there's "Acapulco" by Jason Derulo up 10 places to 40...Joy..

Re Entries

There are seven re entries this week beginning with "Drivers License" by Olivia Rodrigo at number 50, "Need to Know" by Doja Cat at number 49, "Love Tonight" by Shouse gets more love back at 47, "Dreams" by Fleetwood Mac gets another return at 46, the excellent "Overpass Graffiti" by Ed Sheeran returns at 45 (I want to see this become a hit if that is at all possible) and "Oh My God" by Adele at number 36. 

The final re entry is courtesy of the song going viral on Tik Tok with "Lost" by Frank Ocean returning at number 32. It originally peaked at number 46 on the ARIA singles chart in 2013, it was a number five hit in New Zealand years ago. I'd honestly be okay with this is being the latest older song to become a hit.

Losers

So the biggest loser this week was The Weeknd with "Take My Breath" down 29 to 44 and the only surviving album track "Is There Somebody Else" down 15 to 33. The only other loser was "I Hate U" by SZA which slipped four places to 38...kind of disappointed by tha.

Drop Outs

So the rest of "Dawn FM" album tracks from The Weeknd that charted last week dropped out taking "Miserable Man" by David Kushner with it,

New Entries

No new entries this week so that wraps up this week's chart blog. Next week will likely be all about the impact of the Triple J Hottest 100 but we'll find out on Friday when ARIA updates the chart at 5pm

Lookin' Fine '89. 22nd January. Kiss Orange Orush on Copperhead Road

 Oh thank goodness a much quieter week this week after the latent insanity on the chart in the past two weeks although it is just a shame the top two didn't really change this week so let's get stuck into the top ten where "Kokomo" by The Beach Boys continues to hold the number one spot and right now it's got a lock on the number one spot,

"Especially for You" by Kylie Minogue and Jason Donovan remains at number two, it doesn't really look like challenging for number one right now with slow sales, in fact it might have a job to hang on to number two ahead of "Teardrops" by Womack & Womack which jumped four places to number three.on the back of a surge.

It was enough to push "Handle With Care" by The Traveling Wilburys back to number four and "If I Could" by 1927 back to number five,

Also surging up is Annie Lennox and Al Green's duet "Put a Little Love in Your Heart" which climbed four places to number four...good for it...I guess...

This sent "Don't Worry, Be Happy" by Bobby McFerrin continues to slide this week down two places to number seven which could be good news for "Rock and Roll Music" by Mental As Anything which this week climbed one to number eight...there's further gains for this to be had given the weaker songs above it.

Speaking of weak songs in the top ten that can be said of "The Only Way Is Up" by Yazz and the Plastic Population down one to number nine as it's also on the way out.

What's not weak and is actually looking like being a monster hit is "I'm Gonna Be (500 Miles)" by The Proclaimers which stormed all the way from 26 to number 10 this week. Look for this to make further inroads into the top ten in he next week or so.

Gains 

So I already mentioned the big gain for The Proclaimers into the top ten but as for outside the top ten, well, the bland "Every Rose has it's Thorn" by Poison climbed eight places to number 17 while "Two Hearts" by Phil Collins climbed from 33 to 27,

There were also gains for some songs that debuted last week with "Born to Be My Baby" by Bon Jovi up seven to 33 and unfortunately, "Til I Loved You" by Barbra Streisand and Don Johnson jumping from 41 to 34

Also there was a six place gain for "As Long as You Follow" by Fleetwood Mac to 44

Re Entries

"Push It" by Salt N Pepa pushed back in at number 45

Losers

We begin with "Mistletoe & Wine" by Cliff Richard which fell from it's debut of 30 down to 48 because it's a Christmas song...duh.

Then there's "She Wants to Dance With Me" by Rick Astley getting tired down eight places to 43 and 1927's 1988 hit "That's When I Think of You" down from 36 to 42. 

The Angels pulled the down trigger on "Finger on the Trigger" because it plummeted six spots to 40 while people seem to have lost "Desire" by U2 because it tumbled from 29 to 35 and found the used by date on "Bad Medicine" by Bon Jovi which slipped seven to number 30

Howver the chart firmly put a few cats in among the pigeons for Bros because "Cat Among the Pigeons" was one of the big sliders as it plunged from it's debut of 15 to 28 while "Je ne sais pas pourquoi" by Kylie Minogue excuses her French down from 18 to 26/

Finally Jimmy Barnes cover of "When A Man Loves A Woman" slipped from 14 to 20 this week

New Entries

Three new entries this week starting with...

49. "Orange Crush" by R.E.M

So two of our three new entries are in the realm of rock or rock adjacent songs with the first of them coming from R.E.M with "Orange Crush" being the lead single for their album "Green" which was released in 1988 so how is the song? I actually like really like this! The drums sound fantastic and the guitars are damn solid as Michael Stipe sings from the point of view of a fictitious soldier serving in the US Army during the Vietnam War and the use of the chemical detfoliant Agent Orange that was used by the US during that war with the song telling of the stories that Stipe heard given he is the son of a Vietnam vereran and the impact the Vietnam War had on the US soldiers and how they were wrongly blamed for the war.

It's a dark and at times bleak song but it's still a damn great one. Check this out!

47. "Copperhead Road" by Steve Earle

So here we have American country artist Steve Earle with the lead single and  title track for his third album released in 1989 and yeah I love the production on this one too with the mandolin, synths and even the bagpipes sounding pretty damn good!. Steve Earle's vocals are on point too as he tells the story of a soldier who returns home from having served in the war in Vietnam to Copperhead Road East Tennessee only to start trafficking marijuana upon his return so yeah this is a pretty good song too!

19. "Kiss" by The Art of Noise feat. Tom Jones

Sigh...here's a cover of a 1986 Prince song coming fom British synthpop group Art of Noise bringing in Welsh singer Tom Jones in for the vocals and well...Tom Jones just doesn't quite have Prince's suave charisma to pull a song like this off which makes the vocal delivery hit the very precise line of being so stupid it actually becomes really funny and that thought is not helped by the bizarre video. Plus the production feels about as sexy where the horns sound like they are farting on the hook...this does nothing for me. 

It'a slso easily the worst of the week however it's close for the best but I'm going to give that to "Orange Crush" by R.E.M. 

ARIA Top 50 Singles Top Ten/Chart Review; 17th January. How Do I Make You Love Edamame, Miserable Man?

So what panned out this week is pretty much what I expected...we did get a sizeable "Dawn FM" album bomb from The Weeknd which I don't mind as I generally like the album but it also brought assorted new entries but before we get into that, let's dig into the top ten where "Cold Heart (PNAU Remix" by Elton John stays at number one mostly thanks to streaming that hasn't fully given up yet and it still doing good on sales.

"abcdefu" by GAYLE rose one place back to number two as it took the lead on sales and streaming is still robust enough that may challenge for number one soon, it blew past "Stay" by The Kid Laroi and Justin Breber at number three as streaming is the only thing holding it up right now. 

The same goes for the omnipresent "Heat Waves" by Glass Animals at number four, "Bad Habits" by Ed Sheeran at number five, "Shivers" by Ed Sheeran at number six and "Easy On Me" by Adele at number seven. All of these are stalling now and will likely be on the way out of the top ten when stronger tracks finally move up the chart.

That brings us to the first of two new entries to the chart this week with the first of them being "Fingers Crossed" by Lauren Spencer Smith, more about the quality of the song later but it's here because of traction on streaming and it's virality on TikTok right now.

The second new entry comes from the first impact of The Weeknd's album bomb with "Sacrifice" at number nine thanks to decent streaming but I'm not sure as to how long this will last in the top ten going forward...might be a bit of a crap shoot.

Rounding out the top ten is "Do It To It" by Acraze feat. Cherish down two places to number ten this week but should bounce back up next week...unfortunately.

Gains

Unfortunately Luude's cover of "Down Under" feat. Colin Hay is up a massive 29 places to number 19 because people seem to think this bastardisation of an Australian classic is worth something.

"Surface Pressure" by Jessica Darrow is up twenty to 24 and "We Don't Talk About Bruno" by the Cast of Encanto is up eight to 12 as the craze around continues apace, I'm expecting the latter song to hit the top ten soon.

Re Entries

The one re entry this week is thanks to The Weeknd's album bomb with "Take My Breath" back at 15. 

Losers

As you would expect in an album bomb week plenty of songs lost hard including "Acapulco" by Jason DeRulo which slipped 17 to 50, "Mr Brightside" by the Killers down 26 places to 49 and  "We Run the Night" by Havana Brown fell over 10 places to 48 (Kind of glad that "We Run The Night" is not going to get a second wind if I am going to be honest)

"I Am Woman" by Emmy Meli plunged ten to 44 while "All Too Well (Taylor's Version)" by Taylor Swift collpased 19 to 43 although I am impressed that it has managed to stay on the chart this long.

"Beggin" by Maneskin fell 12 spots to 41 while "Montero (Call Me By Your Name)" by Lil Nas X got a 14 place push down to 40.

The Weeknd didn't evcn spare "Blinding Lights" which fell 18 to 39 and even  his collab with Swedish House Mafia "Moth to a Flame" down 12 to 30.

Drop Outs

As you can imagine in an album bomb week, the drop outs are chaos so we'll begin with the songs that will most likely return next week like "Love Tonight" by Shouse, "Dreams"by Fleetwood Mac, the cover of "Dreams" by Jolyon Petch, "Love Nwantiti (ah ah ah)" by Ckay, "Oh My God"by Adele, "Overpass Graffiti" by Ed Sheeran and "Friday" by Riton x Nightcrawlers feat Mufasa and Hyperman.

Older songs whose chart runs should have ended this week..."Watermelon Sugar by Harry Styles, "The Business" by Tiesto, "Mood"  by 24k Goldn feat. Iann Dior, "Sunflower" by Post Malone and Swae Lee and finally "Without You" by The Kid Laroi and Miley Cyrus..

New Entries

Before we get to reviewing the new entries, lets blow through the songs from The Weeknd that I won't be giving full coverage to "Less Than Zero" at 47, "Here We Go...Again" feat. Tyler the Creator- at 46, "Best Friends at 45, "Out of Time" at 29 and "Gasoline" at 28. 

That leaves us with six new entries to talk about and we're not starting with The Weeknd because...

36, "Miserable Man" by David Kushner

So first off the bat this week, we have American singer songwriter David Kushner with a song that of course went viral on TikTok and what we get is this spare acoustic guitar and Kushner sounding like a mix of James Arthur and Dean Lewis and I have to be honest here, this song isn't really doing much for me as it kind of feels one note and Kushner isn't singing with any emotion or force of personality to make me care, it kind of feels like one of those inspirational songs that couples post on Instagram right before the relationship completely breaks down, it's not completely bad however I am still passing on 

33. "Edamame" by BBNO$ feat. Rich Brian

Oh I've been looking forward to writing about this song since I first heard it and it's been around since the middle of 2021 because yeah this is the sort of hip hop I love where there's actually a bright groove thanks to the horns and bbno$ opening the song with the line "Balls hanging low while I pop a bottle on my yacht"which leaves a lot to the imagination but hell this song is ridiculously catchy as bbno$ and Rich Brian rap about finally getting paid for the music they release (well streaming services like Spotify pay artists sweet fuck all but that's another story entirely) but yeah I want this to stick around and become a hit because this is way too much fun...

27. "How Do I Make You Love Me?" by The Weeknd

So we begin our exploration of songs from "Dawn FM" with this song where Abel is desperate to know how he and his lover can make their relationship last over this very standard The Weeknd sound, it's garishly 80s with plenty of synths and a nice groove for The Weeknd to play off except for when the drop happens and it reminds me more of early nineties dance which kind of makes more sense given Swedish House Mafia are on production here and there's a nice transition to "Take My Breath"...all up it's fine...it's not my favurite track from the album but I don't hate this. 

18, "Is There Someone Else?" by The Weeknd

This song is my least favourite song from "Dawn FM" mostly thanks to the production from Max Martin and Oneohtrix Point Never especially with that annoying noise that opens the song, it sounds like something that belongs on Drake's last album and kind of gets infuriating especially as The Weeknd wonders if his lover is cheating on him. Not a fan at all. 

9. "Sacrifice" by The Weeknd

The last of The Weeknd album tracks here with the single that samples "I Want to Thank You" by Alicia Morgan and "I'll Do Anything For You" by Denroy Morgan and yeah this really does sound like a Michael Jackson knock off in the priduction with those synths before getting darker for the bridge and chorus and oddly enough reminds me a bit of a 2010s club boom song. The song sees The Weeknd describe his rather hedonistic lifestyle and the city he is living in. It's a fine enough song but there are better songs on the album. 

8. "Fingers Crossed" by Lauren Spencer Smith

Final new song of the week...and it's another song that got traction thanks to going viral on TikTok and it comes courtesy of former American Idol contestant Lauren Spencer Smith, she was knocked out at the top 20 stage and so a couple of years later we get this...a song aimed at an ex that is not helped by the productuin especially with that limp guitar line, snaps and the backing vocals almostr out singing Spencer Smith. The song isn't completely bad but I'd not be surprised if this fades away very quickly.

And that ends the week on an awkwsrd note, worst of the week goes to "Mieserable Man" by David Kushner for being one note and mediocre.

The best of the week goes to "Edamame" by bbno$ feat Rich Brian because yeah that song is ridivulously catchy.

Next week...looks like we may have to deal with Kanye and Frank Ocean...fun times...chart updates on Fridays at 5pm AEDST on ARIA's website 

Lookin' Fine '89: 15th January. Hippy Hippy Baby Cat Follow the Pigeons & Wine Shake

 So this one felt busier than it probably should have mostly outside the top ten because nothing changed at the very top where "Kokomo" by The Beach Boys held on to number one with "Kokomo" and it looks like its got an iron clad grip on number one at this point. 

It held up over "Especially for You" by Kylie Minogue and Jason Donovan which remains at number two for a second week, although it had to fend off a challenge from three place climber this week "Handle With Care" by The Traveling Wilburys up to number three. 

"If I Could" by 1927 remained at number four while "Don't Worry, Be Happy" by Bobby McFerrin slipped two places back to number five. 

Unfortunately "The Only Way is Up" by Yazz and The Plastic Population lived up to it's name by moving up one spot to number six...ugh.

Also on the rise is 'Teardrops" by Womack & Womack up one spot to number seven this week which is good news. 

Both songs pushed "A Groovy Kind of Love" by Phil Collins back three spots to number eight as it's run looks to be done which paves the way for the big rise of "Rock And Roll Music" by Mental As Anything which jumped from 27 to number nine this week...I'm fine with that...I think.

Finally there's an eight place rise to number ten for "Put A Little Love in Your Heart" by Annie Lennox and Al Green. 

Gains

So I've already mentioned the big gains for Mental As Anything's "Rock And Roll Music" and Annie Lennox and Al Green's "Put a Little Love In Your Heart" but there were also other major gains this week most notably to songs that debuted last week like "I'm Gonna Be (500 Miles)" by The Proclaimers which lapt from it's debut of 42 to 26 this week while "Smooth Criminal" by Michael Jackson climbed six to 32 and "Two Hearts" by Phil Collins climbed ten to 33

Then there's the gain for Toni Childs "Stop Your Fussin'" which rose from 29 to 22 and 'Finger on the Trigger" by The Angels up from 41 to 34.

Losers

So the biggest loser of the week belongs to "So Excellent/I Go Go" by Kylie Mole which slumped from 19 to 49 this week. OUCH.

"Can't Control Myself' by Wa Wa Nee can't control it's slide down from 31 to 45 while Daryl Braithwaite dropped from 37 to 42. 

Noiseworks are losing their "Touch" as their 1988 hit slumped from 24 to 39 qhile "That's When I Think of You" by 1927 slipped ten places 36. 

"Imagine" by John Lennon was the only debut last week to fall, it's down ten places to 31. 

Bon Jovi have taken some "Bad Medicine" to cause a slip of eight places to 23. 

Finally Jason Donovan's "Nothing Can Divide Us" fell six places to 16. 

New Entries

50. "As Long As You Follow" by Fleetwood Mac

So this is one of the two new songs on the Fleetwood Mac greatest hits compilation and yeah, while this is not Fleetwood Mac's best, it's still really damn good. Christine McVie and Eddy Quintela and both sound good together over a gorgeous sounding guitar that really does shift up a gear during it's solo. A song all about finding love and sometimes having to cross boundaries and the unexpected to find it only to find that the person who you love has been following you. It's kind of wistful and really pretty. Check this out.

47. "Hippy Hippy Shake" by The Georgia Satellites

Okay, here's a cover of the 1959 song written and recorded by 17 year old Chan Romero in 1959 that peaked at number three in Australia in that same year and has been covered by The Beatles and others so throw in American southern rock group The Georgia Satellites throwing in their own cover of the song and really, it does not leave me with a lot to say as it's really just an updated and slightly more raucous version of the song that does stick really close to the original. It's fine as far as covers go but I'll stick with The Beatles version over this. 

41. "Til I Loved You" by Barbra Streisand and Don Johnson

So turns out this is also a cover because this was originally set for a never staged musical called "Goya: A Life in Song" which was apparently going to be based on the life of a Spanish artist named Francisco Goya and written by Maury Yeston, it was recorded by tenor Placido Domingo and Dionne Warwick before Barbra Streisand picked the song up for her album of the same name and what a shame the recording sounds like absolute ass, Barbra's vocals sound like they weren't mixed properly and the whole thing sounds like it was recorded in mono on a radio station on the AM band. Not good. PASS.

40. "Born to Be My Baby" by Bon Jovi

The follow up to "Bad Medicine" from their fourth album "New Jersey' and well, it's just as energetic and loud as "Bad Medicine" with Bon Jovi really punishing his voice on the verses but where the song kind of falls flat is on the chorus which is weirdly flat and seems more focused on harmonues rather than rocking out, its like of like the song on the chorus took a step back in favour of the verses which makes the song kind of easy to ignore. It's not precisely bad but Bon Jovi have done better than this. 

30. "Mistletoe & Wine" by Cliff Richard

It's January, what the hell is a Christmas song DOING here NOW? Well anyway this comes courtesy of good old Cliff Richard and was written for a musical called Scraps which is an adaptation of a Hans Christian Andersen story "The Little Match Girl" which Cliff Richard sought to change the lyrics to a more religious theme...it spent several weeks at number one in the UK in 1988 so what's the song like?

Well this is exactly why I am reluctant to cover Christmas music on this blog because it's your pretty standard formulaic Christmas song about Jesus and kids having dreams of Santa and whatever elese set to piano with Cliff's voice oddly frail in the mix. Although don't get caught kissing Santa under the mistletoe drunk on wine, folks.

15. "Cat Among the Pigeons" by Bros

I am kind of surprised the "When Will I Be Famous" group got a song to debut this high with this song coming from the album "Push" and apparently about a friend of one of the members of the band who was struggling to come to terms with his father's early death so dealt with it through a serios of ill fated and tempestuous relationships which I respect Bros attempt to deal with serious issues but my god,,it's a shame that the song couldn't put a little more energy and darkness into the production, it just feels to gentle and to a degree breezy for a song dealing with such a serious subject matter.

That wraps up an awkward week, best is going to "As Long as You Follow" by Fleetwood Mac while the worst is going to "Til I Love You" by Barbra Streisand and Don Johnson. 

Top Ten Worst Hit Songs of 2021.

Another year over, another year full of the ARIA singles chart and the hits and misses of the year, time to do a little summer cleaning and pore over the best and worst of the year. Now while 2021 was still a good year, ir was a step down from 2020 in terms of quality and it wasn't all that hard finding stuff that outright sucked that made ARIA's year end list for 2021 be it slog in pop rap, indie pop, pop country and even a couple of arists I like actually disappointing me this year however I will also say that the bad stuff sticks out in amongst all the good so let's get in, pick up the trash and dispose of it.

However before we go any further, a song can only make this list if it debuted on the year end chart for 2021 or peaked on the year end higher in 2021 than it did in 2020 so older songs like "Someone you Loved" by Lewis Capaldi and "Shape Of You" by Ed Sheeran that made year end lists in previous years are not eligible. Also I'll never put a song on a list like this for being boring...boring can be a factor but there's got to be something wrong with the song to make this list. Finally, this is my list, my opinion so please don't abuse me over what essentially is just my opinion.

Now all that is clear, let's get this shit show on the road starting with only four dishonourable mentions...

Dishonourable Mentions

"Rasputin" by Majestic x Boney M

The original wasn't good to begin with and this remix makes this song so much worse with the screeching of "Ra ra Rasputin"...ugh...next

"No Role Modelz" by J Cole

So apparently this qualified for the Australian year end for the first time in 2021 and my god, this leaves me with the feeling that J Cole is vastly over rated as a rapper because this song is ASININE and is only not making the top because of a rule where I don't put older songs in the top ten of a list of my best or worst hit songs however the lyrics are embarrassing....Martin Luther King would have been on Dreamville...geeez...I got better things to do with my time because this is not it.

"Traitor" by Olivia Rodrigo

Of the four songs Olivia Rodrigo lodged on the year end for 2021, this was the one I liked the least mostly because it felt like this childish jabbing in the tummy of her ex rather than her ahowing that she's not stooping down to his level and moving on with her life, sometimes the best revenge on an asshole is to move on and move forward, be better and don't lower yourself to that level which Olivia doesn't do here.

“The Business” by Tiesto

I get the appeal of the song, but I am sorry, the vocals here don’t make this song anything close to attractive…I get that it’s meant to be a song about getting down to business and getting serious but it’s the sort of song that sounds completely miserable and feels like it belongs in a sewer drain or worse. It’s probably one of the songs that just felt unpleasant to listen to every time I tried to get into and enjoy it…it never happened. 

Number Ten

So in 2017, Travis Scott had a sizeable hit with :Goosebumps" taking an uncredited Kendrick Lamar along for the ride...now i don't mind the original...just a shame I can't say the same of the house remix that came this year...

“Goosebumps” by HVME feat. Travis Scott

Welcome to the most unnecessary Spanish house remix of a song to somehow become a hit in years, there was no need for this. Travis Scott’s 2017 hit “Goosebumps” is a 2010s trap gem so what does producer HVME do to it? Pitches Travis Scott down, percussion that makes the song sound like a raging headache wrapped in a heroin wrap except only less deadly. All the elements that made the original work are not here either, there’s no uncredited Kendrick verse, nor is there the atmosphere or that guitar, it’s just a gutless pointless remix that should have never even charted in the first place and the fact this remix outcharted the original performed by Travis Scott and Kendrick Lamar on the ARIA singles chart is just fucking depressing with the original only peaking at 45, HVME’s version with Travis Scott on board got to number 5…ugh.

Number Nine

Speaking of pointless remixes that become very disappointing when you see the names attached to them...

“Cold Heart (PNAU Remix)” by Elton John and Dua Lipa

I really didn’t want to do this…I didn’t want to put two acts I absolutely love on worst hit songs of 2021 list. Dua Lipa had one of the best and most iconic pop albums of 2020, she has still been riding residual success on the singles chart thanks to “Levitating”, she didn’t have to do this however “Cold Heart” got enough overt radio play to make the song start to sour on me and here it is. For one thing Dua Lipa supplies these thin, frail sounding vocals singing a section of “Rocket Man (I think it’s Going to be a Long Long Time)” and doesn’t sound like herself in between Elton John singing a section of “Sacrifice” on a new song. PNAU’s production doesn’t help thanks to the pile up of near constant strange noises, the only thing that works is the groove, there’s just too much going on for the song to flow both in the production and lyrically. It’s just a disjointed mess that hopefully will be forgotten about long term

Number Eight

You know, if there was one artist who had a really good 2021, it would have to be Doja Cat...she was pretty much the dominant force on the charts for women in hip hop, it's just a shame that not every song released from Planet Her was good because in 2021, Doja Cat gave us this...

“Need To Know” by Doja Cat

Doja, you’ve done this sort of song before...it was one of the biggest hits of 2020 and called “Say So” and even if the beat Dr Luke provided for that song was washed out and not great however it was better than this trap clunker. While I have gotten to a point where I can handle Doja’s harsher vocal delivery, she just doesn’t sound good here at all where she’s wanting to know if this guy will fuck her already. This is a sex song that’s not as sexy as Doja Cat or anyone else involved with this song thinks it is, thankfully she did better in 2021 but this headache and a half wasn't it.

Number Seven

Speaking of headaches...it's time to talk about the winners of 2021's Eurovision Song Contest...

“Beggin’” by Maneskin

The first thing that should be stressed is that this is not a cover of the original performed by Frankie Valli but rather a cover of the version Madcon recorded in 2007 and in a year where Italian Eurovision winners Maneskin burst onto the scene following their Eurovision win earlier this year thanks to “ZItti e Buoni” but somehow instead of that song getting big, we got this cover that become big and at first I was okay with the song but as time went on, “Beggin’” just got worse thanks to one pivotal factor that being the lead vocals which can best be described as a mix of crooner who forgot that warming the throat up is an important part of being able to sing well and the sound of somebody who is recovering from a serious bout of laryngitis and discovered he can talk again, it isn’t tolerable. At least on songs like “Zitti e Buoni”, the vocals sound pleasant enough but I just can’t with “Beggin’”...I’m sorry...the radio gets turned every time the song comes on.

Number Six

So what cha all know about rolling down in the deep...not like this next bloke has much of a clue

“Astronaut in the Ocean” by Masked Wolf

Well, this is 2021’s obvious worst list target more because the song tries to send a message about depression and anxiety but doesn’t tell a story to make me feel anything for him and the fact he is talking down to the audience on the hook where he manages to piss me off further by referencing Adele’s incredible 2011 hit “Rolling in the Deep” whiile talking down to his audience and the verses read more like him being the quintessential ‘nice guy’ and later brags about his prowess in rap...I mean sure he has a decent flow but that’s about it, he certainly doesn’t have the wordplay or charisma of others. Oh yeah, the song wastes a pretty good guitar that introduced the song...NEXT.

Number Five

Lewis Capaldi took a break in 2021...thank goodness...but that didn't mean we weren't spared of British solo acts howling like banshees...here's proof of that...

“Little Bit of Love” by Tom Grennan

I have been aware of UK singer songwriter Tom Grennan for a while and while there are songs from him I don’t mind like “Run in the Rain” or “Barbed Wire” however “Little Bit of Love” is a pretty awful crossover into commercial pop especially as Tom Grennan feels he has to haltingly shout the hook in the most over the top manner that comes across as really unnecessary  and unfortunately it's one where the Lewis Capaldi reference I made in introducing this song to the list because like on "Someone You Loved", the sentiments are so oversold and yowling they become distracting. Throw in the production that just feels like its compromising Tom Grennan’s overall sound just to get him a cross over pop hit and yeah...this was a dud the charts could have done without.

Number Four

Yeah, we were going to hit this point eventually but it's time to talk about The Kid Laroi on this list...

“Stay” by The Kid Laroi feat. Justin Bieber

The longer this stayed at number one on the ARIA singles chart, the more it soured for me especially as I realized that ‘Stay” is basically just Kid Laroi’s predecessor single (we’ll get to it) part two as the Kid Laroi bleats that he wants this girl to stay even though she’s fed up with his nonsense of getting drunk and wasted despite promising he’ll change which triggers an inert Bieber verse although I will say he sounds better crooning over the beat than The Kid Laroi does, Bieber basically sucks up to this poor fed up woman about her being the reason he believes in love blah blah even though it doesn’t even fit with the sentiment The Kid Laroi is expressing, it’s just totally pathetic from the pair of them, why would she want to stay when all The Kid Laroi seems to do is bleat, guilt trip and act like a baby? No woman who knows her value would stay with a guy like this. As for the instrumentation…well yeah…it sounds like an instrumental that can be inserted into most eighties leaning modern pop songs, it's not all that special. 

Number Three

You might be surprised as to how this song is so high on this list...well one of the artists on this song happens to be an artst I like and given most of what she has released this year was 'easy listening, fit for radio' junk, this one hurts to put here and I thought putting Dua Lipa and Elton John on this list hurt...

"One Too Many" by Keith Urban and Pink

Having heard a lot of Pink's past work for reasons that I can't go into right now but you'll see on the blog soon, I just couldn't reconcile the fact that the very same Pink who recorded songs like "Get the Party Started", "U + Ur Hand" and "So What" was now recording material for the easy listening meat grinder to gobble up and spit out the other side like this song with Keith Urban where Pink sounds like she has been stripped of all her personality next to country singer Keith Urban who also has about as much personality on this song as grandma's beige curtains from the 50s. is just devastating.

Yeah, you can argue that Pink is older and her earlier material isn't representative of who she is now but come on, she's better than this turgid pop slurry off a song that made nobody other than radio programmers happy that they had something to fit in between The Kid Laroi and Jason DeRulo.

Number Two

Well...it's time to cool these heat waves down to a sudden cold snap...

“Heat Waves” by Glass Animals

This is one of those songs where the awful is obvious, the whole song sounds like a god damn mosquito or bee buzzing in your ear until you flick it away or do what I did every time this song come on the radio...turn it off. It’s not pleasant at all even the vocal delivery sounds like they are being put to sleep by having sand thrown in their eyes by the Sandman in children’s stories, it sounds so incredibly lethargic and drowsy sounding, it’s literally the last song I would want to hear on the radio as I am starting my day because of just how unpleasant it sounds, I am honestly surprised that it somehow got Tik Tok virality causing it to become one of the biggest hits of the year because of the mosquito buzzing in the ear sound it has.

It’s just one of those songs that has absolutely no use regardless of the situation, the sound of the sound makes it hard for chilling and the groove is too lethargic and slow to dance to, Almsot like they wanted the song to be a trap song but didn’t have the tools to get it there. 

So before we get to our rightful number one worst hit song of the year, let's blow through a few terrible songs that hit year ends overseas...let's call this segment...

Overseas Charting Noise Pollution

From the Billboard Hot 100...

"Fancy Like" by Walker Hayes.

I am not going to rant at length about how absolutely fucking terrible this song is and by now every critic has hauled this song over the coals for how absolutely rancid it is even if I get the gut feeling, it's the boost Walker Hayes flagging career needed to chart more dross on the Hot 100...just fuck everything....

"Good Time" by Niko Moon

At least Owl City and Carly Rae Jepsen didn't have to try to and have a good time when they recorded their ode to partying where as Niko Moon sounds like he is at the flattest party possible where the only beer left to drink is half a can that's been sittting in the all god damn day. What a limp and lethargic song this is.

From the UK Official Charts

"Black Magic" by Jonasu

I've heard this song on the radio once...that's the last time I want to hear this miserable turd again because geezus this is just a repetitive song that makes me want to throw my radio down the toilet.

"Out Out" by Joel Corry, Jax Jones and Charli XCX feat. Saweetie

Oh wow....this was a disappointing collab...too many people on the damn song for it to work well and as somebody who is looking forward to that Charli XCX album...the fact she was involved with this was the biggest disappointment of all.

From the Austrian charts

"Iko Iko" by Justin Wellington

A song that by now has been repeatedly covered and this newest version sounds like wallpaper and Justin Wellington's voice can't sell shit on a stick. Heard this song more than enough on the radio this year.

Well that takes care of that and now for the number one worst hit song of the year...

Number One

Yeah, there's no getting around this one, this song makes me angry much like "Intentions" by Justin Bieber feat. Quavo did and like that song, this one has been a consistent thorn in my side since it became a thing on the ARIA singles chart...and by now, given I have no interest in trolling those who read my cavalcades of nonsense, you should all know what the song is....

"Without You" by The Kid Laroi

Honestly, I don’t want to even put The Kid Laroi here but he keeps making gummy guitar based songs like this where not even he sounds good on it then it leaves me with no choice but to put ‘Without You” here however it’s not even the production that’s the worst part of the song where Kid Laroi himself sounds like he swallowed three packets of razor blades trying to sing the hook before trying to howl his lungs out, to the point it makes Lewis Capaldi on "Someone You Loved" sound tolerable, the worst part of “Without You” is the writing where apparently you can’t make a wife out of a hoe (what a way to talk about women, dude...not) and how the song lacks so little context and feels like Kid Laroi is guilt tripping this girl, it’s just an icky song that deserves the status of being the worst hit song of 2021. 

ARIA Singles Top 50 Top Ten/Chart Review. 10th January 2022: The Motto Don't Talk About Bruno Down Under

Welcome back for another year of chart insanity and this week to a degree does feel like it especially with all the Christmas music gone and everything that came in to fill in space for this week only and with The Weeknd likely to get an album bomb next week, I am not placing too much stock in this week.

Let's begin with the top ten where for another week "Cold Heart (PNAU Remix)" by Elton John and Dua Lipa keeps hold of the number one spot for a sixth week but it's not exactly dominant on either streaming or sales, let's just say it's vulnerable should The Weeknd manage to blow in and dominate streaming with his new album.

The same goes for "Stay" by The Kid Laroi featuring Justin Bieber at number two where it's doing decently on streaming but sales kept it at number two this week. 

"abcdefu" by Gayle would be a contender but it's streaming feels like it might well be stalling at the worst possible time...and I am kind of okay with that, this song has only gotten worse for me over the Christmas/ New Year period.

"Heat Waves" by Glass Animals is at number four thanks to a third wind on streaming. Seriously, aren't people sick of this song yet?

Then there's "Bad Habits" at number five and "Shivers" at number six both for Ed Sheeran. I kind of expect "Bad Habits" to slowly fall away pretty soon.

"Easy On Me" by Adele hangs on to number seven then there's "Do It to It" by Acraze up to number eight because for some reason, we need a shitty remix of a bad song from the 2000s.

"Industry Baby" by Lil Nas X feat Jack Harlow remains at number nine while climbing into the top ten for it's first week is "Where Are You Now" by Lost Frequencies feat. Calum Scott...the less said about that one the better.

Gains

We've got a lot of them this week...mostly songs just filling gaps left by Christmas music so let's begin with "Good 4 U" by Olivia Rodrigo ip 22 spots to number 11, "Levitating" by Dua Lipa lived up to it's name as it is levitated 29 spots to number 12, "Kiss Me More" by Doja Cat feat. SZA got kissed up 30 places to 13, "Ghost" by Justin Bieber up 17 to 14, "Enemy" by Imagine Dragons feat. JID up 24 to 15, and "That's What I Want" by Lil Nas X up 29 to 16

Then there's "One Right Now" by Post Malone and The Weeknd rising 29 to 18, "Save Your Tears" by The Weeknd up 31 to 19, "All Too Well (Taylor's Version)" by Taylor Swift climbing 25 to 24. 

Re Entries

Alright, there's TWENTY SEVEN songs that returned this week so I am going to start from the bottom and work my way through them all.

"Without You" by The Kid Laroi feat. Miley Cyrus returned at 50, "Sunflower" by Post Malone and Swae Lee made a surprise and unexplained return at 49, "Mood" by 24kGoldn and Iann Dior is back at 47, "The Business" by Tiesto got back to business on the chart at 46, "Oh My God" by Adele is back at 45 (seems like this song is going to be the next single from '30'), "Overpass Graffiti" by Ed Sheeran graffitied itself back on to the chart at 43, "Moth to a Flame" by Swedish House Mafia and The Weeknd at 42, "Watermelon Sugar" by Harry Styles at 41 and "Friday" by Riton and Nightcrawlers feat. Mufasa and Hyperman at 40,

Then there's "Dreams" by Jolyon Petch dreaming it's return at 39, the other big surprise return of the perpetual annoyance that is Havana Brown's "We Run the Night" at 38, Billie Eilish is back at 36 with '"Happier Than Ever", "love nwantiti (ah ah ah)" by Ckay back at 35, "I Am Woman" by Emmy Meli jumps back in at 34, "Acapulco" by Jason Derulo flies back in at 33, "Meet Me At Our Spot" by The Anxiety meets it's chart spot at 32, "I Hate U' by SZA returns at 31 and "My Universe" by Coldplay feat. BTS  at number 30.

We're not done yet because "Beggin'" by Maneskin is back at 29, "Woman" by Doja Cat at 28, "Dreams" by Fleetwood Mac at 27, "Montero (Call Me by Your Name)" at 26, "Missing Piece" by Vance Joy at 25, "Mr Btightside" by The Killers at 23 (You know, you can make "West Hills" a hit any time you like...), "Love Tonight" by Shouse at 22, "Blinding Lights" by The Weeknd at 21 and finally "Better Days" by NEIKED and Mae Muller feat. Polo G at 17.

Losers

There are none...

Drop outs

It was basically a mass exodus of Christmas music this week including over half of last week's top ten and is an argument as to why ARIA should consider putting the singles chart on hiatus over the holiday period..

New Entries

Four new entries this week beginning with...

48. "Down Under" by Luude (feat. Colin Hay.

So this comes from Australian electronic producer called Luude and it's a cover of Men At Work's early 80s hit and bonafide Australian classic "Down Under" and well...this just isn't good...at all. It pitches out the window the entire melody of the original except for a fragment of flute (that melody is what makes the song fantastic) replacing them with darker electronic sounds and it just doesn't work especially when you are going to pitch down Colin Hay's voice and fill the chorus with unnecessary electronic effects...this is pretty terrible...NEXT...

44. "Surface Pressure" by Jessica Darrow

This is the first of two songs from the Disney musical "Encanto" to appear new on the chart and well this one comes from Cuban American actress Jessica Darrow who plays Luisa and according to reports Luisa is said to possess superhuman powers which means she gets called on a lot to help out which she finds the constant need for her help by others to be stressful and dehumanising which is may not look like on the surface but under it, Luisa is struggling with the weight of others expectations but in spite of all this she isn't going to stop helping people but this really does feel like a self empowerment song where the actual music can't match the lyrical sentiments...this could have been better.

37. "The Motto" by Tiesto and Ava Max

So of course, "The Business" was huge last year and off the back of that Tiesto follows it up with a new song bringing Ava Max on board and I mean really this feels like "The Business Part 3" only slightly less miserable and Ava Max has all her personality which makes her interesting as a pop singer sucked out of her by the production which feels only slightly less miserable than "The Business" in terms of its sound and the song lyrically just does nothing for me... not feeling this at all. 

20. "We Don't Talk About Bruno" by The Cast of Encanto

We're relying on the second song from Encanto, this time a song about the titular character of the song, Bruno who has by this stage of the movie been cast out of the family and everyone is under orders to not talk about him because of the bad things that he has been predicting to happen and do end up happening....the song has catchy enough hook but it does feel kind of messy and weird...it's not bad but it's not really my thing.

However in a rough week, "We Don't Talk About Bruno" is the best of the week here, as for the worst, yeah that falls out easily too. because that's going to the mess that is the cover of "Down Under" by Luude feat. Colin Hay. 

Next week, likely to be dominated by The Weeknd but we'll find out when the chart updates at 5pm on Friday.

Song of the Australian Summer

Song of the Summer competition is underway for the summer of 2021 to 22. Now to explain how this works, it's limited to songs that hit inside the top ten and gain an inverse number of points according to their chart position so number one gets ten points, number two gets nine points etc every week. Now leading that competition is "Cold Heart (PNAU Remix)" by Elton John feat. Dua Lipa. The competition runs until the last chart week of February. 

Lookin' Fine '89. 8th January. Two Hearts of Every Rose Imagine Especially You for A Cuppla Days

Brand new year and it's now time to see how the first chart of 1989 is shaping up after the hiatus over Christmas and New Year and we are starting 1989 with a new number one that being "Kokomo" by the Beach Boys...just a shame that the song itself is pretty damn terrible, it's got none of the driving energy past great Beach Boys songs have and just ends up falling flat..

However it does have competition coming from a new entry this week that being "Especially For You" by Kylie & Jason. I'll talk more about the song's quality later but it's here through strong sales...probably from people who are looking at this song through a Scott and Charlene from Neighbours lens. 

All this saw the final number one of 1988  "Don't Worry, Be Happy" by Bobby McFerrin slip two places to number three...I don't have an opinion either way about this one...I guess I tolerate it to a degree?

Stuck at number four is 1927's "If I Could", a song that I actually really like and happy to see it doing well! 

Slipping two places to number five is the bland "Groovy Kind of Love" by Phil Collins. We've got more Phil Collins to get to later in the new entries. 

In better news, 'Handle With Care" by supergroup The Traveling Wilbury climbed two places to number six. Yeah, this song is great so nice to see it in the top ten. 

It pushed past "The Only Way is Up" by Yazz and The Plastic Population which slipped two places to number seven because yeah...about time...

There's another new arrival in the top ten this time thanks to Womack & Womack with "Teardrops" rising five places to number eight.

Transvision Vamp stay steady this week with "I Want Your Love" at number nine while rounding out the top ten is the second top ten entry for Jason Donovan with "Nothing Can Divide Us" down three places to number ten.

Gains

"She Makes My Day" by Robert Palmer rose six places to break into the top twenty at number 20 while "Put A little Love In Your Heart" by Annie Lennox and Al Green climbed from 22 to 19. 

"Stand Up for Your Love Rights" by Yazz looks to be following in the steps of  "Only Way is Up" as it rose from 29 to 22 this week while "Love Bites" by Def Leppard climbed ten places to 23 and "Angel of Harlem" by U2 got a major boost from 42 to 25. 

Rick Astley's "She Wants to Dance With Me" jumped from 41 to 36.

Losers

So it's been a busy week on the losers as former hits of 1988 start making their way out, let's begin with "Let's Stick Together (Westside '88 Remix)" by Bryan Ferry which tumbled eleven places to 49 (I'm fine with this as I really cannot stand the original at all). 

"Domino Dancing" by Pet Shop Boys is finally showing some signs of exhaustion down from 39 to 46 while "Love, Truth and honesty' by Bananarama got hit with a twelve place drop to number 44. 

The Angels have their "Finger on the Trigger" of a chart exit as their single tumbled from 34 to 41. 

"Two Strong Hearts" by John Farnham might be starting to experience heart failure as it tumbled eleven places to 39 while "All I Do" by Daryl Braithwaite slipped from 23 to 37. "Stop Your Fussin'" by Toni Childs fussed down fifteen places to 35, it wasn't a good week for Toni as her other hit "Don't Walk Away" slipped from 17 to 29

Robert Palmer's massive hit in 1988,  "Simply Irresistible" took a ten place hit to 34 while "Desire" by U2 suffered the biggest fall of the week down from 16 to 33.

New Entries

So we're starting 1989 off with eight new entries to the singles chart so let's begin our look at these with...oh good lord....

48. "A Cuppla Days" by Con The Fruiterer

So we're starting off on a weird note and I get the feeling that this song was inspired in part thanks to Comedy Company cast mate Kylie Mole having traction on the chart in 1988 that we get this from Company's fruit and vege shop owner Con Dickaletus aka Con the Fruiterer. The music certainly fits for the song and the lyrics are all about managing a fruit and vege shop and are pretty dang funny, look, it's a silly comedy novelty song that got here by the fact that the Comedy Company is popular and even if I don't see sticking around, I can't hate it, it's good fun. 

43. "Two Hearts" by Phil Collins

Okay so after a novelty song...we get a new single from an artist who solo is utterly mediocre...I'm sorry but I've just never ever cared for a Phil Collins song outside of Genesis and "Groovy Kind of Love" is the sort of song I'd expect from a guy whose hits include "Against All Odds" and "In the Air Tonight" so anyway how's his latest single from his 1988 album "Buster"? Well I'll say this...it's nice to hear a more upbeat song than the maudlin "Groovy Kind of Love", it's got a bit of a soul vibe that kind of works in the song's favour in terms of giving it some groove and even if the handclaps can get annoying...I'm fine with this right now. 

42. "I'm Gonna Be (500 Miles)" by The Proclaimers

A Scottish duo for whom this song is their lead single from their 1988 album "Sunshine on Leith", the song was apparently written while waiting to attend a Sottish football game in Aberdeen but you know what? This song winds up being fantastic...that hook is enough to get stuck in your head for days on end as The Proclaimers say they will always be there for their significant other and walk to the ends of the earth even if they have to go 500 miles or more to do anything for their partners...definitely a lot of fun. Check this out.

38. "Smooth Criminal' by Michael Jackson

Okay, so the new single from Michael Jackson with it being the seventh for his 1987 album "Bad" and well yeah, this is awesome even if I don't think it's the best single from "Bad', MJ's charisma still shines here over that memorable riff as the lyrics tell the story of a woman who was attacked by a man labelled as a 'smooth criminal and the chorus making sure this woman named Annie (apparently inspired by the name of the CPR mannequin at the time) and the screams from Michael fit here too and he knows enough to play up the suspense so yeah...this is a really damn good song!

28. "Every Rose Has Its Thorn" by Poison

So now we've got American band Poison dipping into power ballad mode and while the instrumentation does feel powerful even i a little overwrought, the lyrics just feel really flat. The song was inspired by lead singer Bret Michaels ringing his girlfriend from a laundromat only to find out his girlfriend was cheating on him which only makes this song feel even weirder, this just doesn't resonate for me at all...there's no anger or rage here. This doesn't do a thing for me at all, I'm moving on from this.

21. "Imagine" by John Lennon and The Plastic Ono Band

Okay this song is from John's 1971 album of the same name, a kind of bare bones piano ballad where John Lennon asks for people to imagine the world without particular things and I have to be honest here, the song just feels like an empty vessel...yes, it might want to preach the ideal of peace but it's got this weirdly empty way of doing so and I'm not sure that lyrically the song achieves what it sets out to do, it's not precisely bad but it's a song that's strong enough to make me care either way.

 

16. "Je Ne Sais Pas Pourquoi" by Kylie Minogue

       (I Do Not Know Why)

So here's the fourth single from Kylie Minogue's debut album "Kylie" and well, I kind of like this one? Yeah it's got drum machines, synthesisers and some minor guitar riffs and Kylie sounds the best she has on any of the singles here than she has on any of the previous three singles however it's the content of this song that does a lot of the heavy lifting where Kylie wonders why she still loves and wants this asshole given he is never with her and off doing something else without calling her to let her know and leaving her feeling stood up and let down...I'll take this unlike...

2. "Especially for You" by Kylie & Jason

Well this collab between Kylie Minogue and Jason Donavan seemed inevitable considering that their characters Charlene Mitchell and Scott Robinson got married on Neighbours in 1987 and honestly this song has got to be the most awkward duet I've ever heard especially as it''s the pair of them crooning back and forth about how they've missed each other while they've been apart and with these two, it can tend to come across as kind of weirdly saccharine or really uncomfortably awkward and to a degree corny....it's not my thing.

Howver it's not the worst of the week with that going to "Every Rose Has It's Thorn" by Poison. I'm going to give dishonourable mention to "Imagine" by John Lennon...sorry...I'm just not a huge fan of how empty that song is.

As for the best...we do have some options here. I'm giving best of the week to "Smooth Criminal" by Michael Jackson with "I'm Gonna Be (500 Miles)" by The Proclaimers just edging out "Two Hearts" by Phil Collins for the honourable mention.