All 4 1994: January 16th Wishing Green Limousine on Maximum Overdrive

 Week two of 1994 and we have a fairly interestong week in prospect on the ARIA singles chart with plenty of movement in the top ten and outside of it as well however let's begin with the top ten where the big story of the week is our new number one that being "Boom! Shake the Room" by DJ Jazzy Jeff & The Fresh Prince. it got enough sales to just nab the numbher one spot this week thanfully ending the five week reign at number one by "Please Forgive Me" by Bryan Adams which fell back to number two and doesn't look to be a threat to number one anymore

I'd say...unfortunately...the threat to our new number one is coming from "All For Love" by Bryan Adams, Rod Stewart and Sting which got a two place boost to number three.

"Shoop" by Salt 'N' Pepa is the only song in the top ten that didn't move as it remains glued to the number four spot. "All That She Wants" by Ace of Base slid two places to number five as it looks to be on the downswing now. 

M People's "Moving On Up" lives up to it's name by moving up three places to number six...this has momentum behind it so I can see this climbing higher in the weeks ahead.

Speaking of momentum also up three spots to seven is "Hero" by Mariah Carey...a song that's fine enough but not Mariah's best song however it did move past "Creep" Radiohead at number eight and "Got to Get It" by Culture Beat at number nine.

Finally a new arrival to the top ten, moving up nine places is Cut 'N' Move's cover of KC and the Sunshine Band's "Give It Up"

Losers

Lets rip our way through the biggest losers of the week starting from "Sweat (A La La La La Long)" by Inner Circle finally making it's way out down nine places to 46. 

Efua's "Somewhere" slides from 35 to 41 this week as it hit the downswing. "Go West" by Pet Shop Boys took the wrong direction and went south seven places to 30.

Meatloaf's "Rock and Roll Dreams Comr Through" dipped from 18 to 23 while 'The Weight" by Jimmy Barnes and The Badloves fell out of the top ten down six to number 12.

Re-Entries

Just the one re-entry with "Dur dur d'etre bebe" by Jordy returning at 39

Gains

Not too many major gains outside the top ten this week but the one song that seems to have absolutely jumped up the charts is "Slave to the Music" by Twenty 4 Seven feat. Stay-C and Nance which climbed from 28 to 14 this week and looks headed for the top ten at this rate. 

Urban Cookie Collective had a four place gain to 20 with "Feels Like Heaven" while "Hey Mr DJ" by Zhane climbed six places to 21. 

"Where is the Love" by Rick Price and Margaret Urlich rebounded after last week's fall, they are seven to 33. 

New Entries

Four new entries this week, starting with...

49. "Into Your Arms" by The Lemonheads.

So we've got a bunch of bands or groups this week and we start off with an American alternative rock band and I actually like this a fair bit, it's got this solid hooky groove courtesy of those guitars and the drums absolutely kill. I guess the only issue is the vocals, they don't have as much punch or power as I would like but hey, this is still a pretty solid song, hope it sticks around.

47. "Green Limousine" by The Badloves

Fresh off nabbing a top ten hit with Jimmy Barnes in 1993, we've got a new Badloves song and it's pretty mich a blues rock song and look, it's solid but it's not giving me much to say except in terms of the fact it's supposed to be about celebrities who jump aboard any cause's bandwagon if it proves to be fashipnable which is something worth calling out but I reckon the issue deserves a punchier song than this. 

44. "Wishing On the Same Star" by Girlfriend

So Girlfriend's newest effort is a cover of a 1991 song by an American singer songwriter named Keedy with the song written by Diane Warren and honestly I think I like the Gitlfriend version a lot better mostly because they amp up the girls harmonies and Melanie Alexander, who takes the lead vocal on this song can sell this with the sincerity and spirit a song about somebody reminding a loved one that no matter what they are wishing on the star and looking at the same moon and the song has a more lush and warm sound. Definitely dig this, check it out. 

40. "Maximum Overdrive" by 2 Unlimited.

Oh 2 Unlimited again...sigh...I don't have fondness for this group's thumping dance music that's got as much going for it as an empty bucket and yeah...this is just annoying especially with that "woo!" noise punctuating the melody. This is just soulless bleh. Move on.

To no one's surprise, it's the worst of the week. Best of the week is close between The Lemonheads and Girlfriend...I'm going to give it to Girlfriend for "Wishing on the Same Star" but again "Into My Arms" by The Lemonheads is pretty damn good too.

ARIA Singles Top 50 Chart Review: January 13th. Somedays Indigo Push 2 Start a Smile

Well, things have finally started moving on the ARIA singles chart for 2025, we have quite the busy week on hand here so let's get started with the top ten where the top two didn't move with "APT" by Rose and Bruno Mars remains at number one for yet another week, it's lost a bit of it's streaming margin but it's still strong on sales and Youtube, it was enough of a margin to hold sway over "That's So True" by Gracie Abrams at number two, it's gained a bit on streaming but hasn't got as strong a sales or Youtube presence to challenge for number one.

A challenger for the top spot is emerging at number three though with "Messy" by Lola Young up two spots to number three as it gained hard on streaming this week and looks like it might make a run for the top spot.

What won't be making a run at the number one spot are "Die  with a Smile" by Bruno Mars and Lady Gaga down one place to four, "Birds of a Feather" by Billie Eilish down one to number five and "A Bst Song (Tipsy)" by Shaboozey, all three are just naturally just starting to fall back now to make way for new hits.

Speaking of new hits, it looks like "The Days (NOTION Remix)" by Chrystal and Notion is going to get huge as it climbed a massive eleven places to number seven this week, this has streaming momentum so wouldn't be at all surprised if this broke into the top five in the weeks ahead.

The rest of the top ten are 2024 hits with "Espresso" and "Taste" by Sabrina Carpenter with the former remaining at number eight and the latter up one to number nine.

Finally "I Had Some Help" by Post Malone feat Morgan Wallen down one to number ten as it starts to head out of the top ten.

Losers

Yeah we had some massive losers this week mostly older songs that keep appearing on the chart for some reason like "Iris" by The Goo Goo Dolls which fell sixteen places to forty seven, "I Remember Everything" by Zach Bryan and Kacey Musgraves down fifteen to forty three and "Something in the Orange" by Zach Bryan down nine spots to thirty three

However there were also some big falls for some more recent hits like Chappell Roan's "Hot To Go! down twelve to forty five, thankfully "Stumblin' In" by Cyril stumbled down eleven to forty one,"Austin (Boots Stop Working)" by Dasha which slipped eleven to twenty five.

Drop Outs

There were some major drop outs this week with former number ones "Last Night" and "Guess" by Charli XCX feat Billie Eilish both gone. Not complaining though..."Last Night" is still fucking atrocious and "Guess" should make the year end list.

Also gone are "Million Dollar Baby" by Tommy Richman, "I Like the Way You Kiss Me" by Artemas. 
and "Prada" by Casso, Raye and D-Block Europe along with "Scared to Start" by Michael Marcagi and "Ain't No Love in Oklahoma" by Luke Combs

Finally the much older song "Take Me to Church" by Hozier also left.

Gains

So I mentioned the nine place gain for Chrystal and Notion's "The Days" but there wete some significant gains on the chart this week especially for new entries from last week with "BMF" by SZA which gained ten places to seventeen while "Linger (Sirius XM Sessions)" by Royrl Otis climbed  nine places to thirty seven.

"The Door" by Teddy Swims climbed five places to twenty four this week, this song doesn't have the traction "Lose Control" did but I am happy to see this song becoming a sleeper hit.

Re Emtries

However when the other two are "Kisses" by BL3SS and CamrinWatsin (feat. bbyclose) at thirty one and "Slow It Down" by Benson Boone at twenty seven... I'd almost want to question the taste of the Australian public, we could have started 2025 on an even better note without "Slow It Down" especially.

New Entries

Four new entries this week, it's and electic mix of songs but we're starting with

44. "Push 2 Start" by Tyla

Oh finally, another Tyla song has crossed over to the charts only it's a song that isn't on the standard the edition of Tyla's self titled album but rather the deluxe edition of the album called "Tyla+" and I got to be honest here, this is a pretty good song rather than it being great mostly because that drum mixing just feels little off but otherwise yeah, I'll take this with its absolutely gorgeous African amapiano vibe and Tyla's smooth sultry vocal delivery. Check this out. 

38. "Indigo" by Sam Barber and Avery Anna

I've been waiting for American country singer/songwriter Sam Barber to break through in Australia. I've just not really ever been a fan of this, Barber has always felt like way too much of a Zach Bryan knock off and why listen to a knock off when I could listen to the real thing? But with Zach having his issues, it's seems people have gone looking for alternatives and landed on Sam Barber and this song with Avery Anna who is an American country singer who released an album that I never around to hearing and well...this is fine enough, it's a song where this couple is on the edge of a break up and there's a lot of wistful regret as they get set to part ways over sparse guitars, I do wish there was more interplay between Barber and Anna which does kind of hurt the song but it's still good. Check it out. 

36. "Smile" by Morgan Wallen

Sigh...I don't enjoy reviewing Morgan Wallen's music in case you cannot tell, I just find it miserable and his nasal drone makes me think he is singing through a cold but anyway we have this new song and while it's nowhere as contemptible as some of his absolute worst songs...this just isn't any good at all, the beat is too stiff and sterile and Morgan Wallen makes the song all about his jealousy that this girl only smiles when she isn't talking to him. There's this weird condescension that makes this song a painful listen. Next.

34. "Somedays" by Sonny Fodera, D.O.D and Jazzy

So Sonny Fodera is a UK based Australian house producer currently living in London, he teamed up with English producer D.O.D and Irish singer Jazzy who has been notching hits in the UK by featuring on some pretty awful songs with Belters Only but unlike the Belters Only, this song is solid, there's enough of a foundation to this song with that gentle keyboard beat and there's enough sense to ensure that the song isn't a dud plus the lyrics encourage people to not get discouraged, keep fighting and eventually your turn to shine will come. Good song.

That wraps the week and honestly...not too bad! "Smile" by Morgan Wallen nets the worst of the week. I think the best of the week will go to "Push 2 Start" by Tyla as I see myself returning to that song more but it was close.

Next week..I am not sure, we'll have to see. 

ARIA Singles Chart Review: 6th January. Don't Stop Believin' just Linger on that Notion and BMF

We're back in action for 2025 and the ARIA chart has reset post Christmas to something that actually kind of shows that not much changed during the week the Christmas music took over the charts because back at number one is "APT" by Rose and Bruno Mars granted this is riding the impact of the rerlease of her new album late last year but this still has solid enough sales and streaming to keep the number one spot ahead of the increasingly annoying "That's So True" by Gracie Abrams which has streaming but it's not enough to overtake "APT"

"Die With A Smile" by Bruno Mars and Lady Gaga is at number three thanks to having good sales but it's streaming isn't anywhere it needs to be to take the number one, it could start falling with stronger songs behind it.

"Birds of a Feather" by Billie Eilish hangs in at number four, it's in a pretty similar positon to "Die With a Smile' just with streaming a little steadier than sales. Another former chart topper "A Bar Song (Tipsy) by Shaboozey sits at number five and like other songs above it, looks to be on the downswing.

 

In what is shaping as the first truly big hit of 2025, "Messy" by Lola Young is at number six thanks to streraming and sales being decent, this has radio traction and should continue to stick around which is great to see because I like the song.

Now I would like to attribute the rest of this top ten down to people listen to end of 2024 end of year playlists of their most played songs because explains why "Beautiful Things" by Benson Boone continues to plague the top ten like the antibiotic resistant venereal diesease it is at number seven, "Espresso" by Sabrina Carpenter at number eight, "I Had Some Help" by Post Malone and Morgan Wallen at number nine and "Taste" by Sabrina Carpenter at number ten.

There's literally no point talking about losses and drop outs as there were no losses and all the drop outs were just Christmas music.

Gains

Let's go through the gains because there were songs that did stick around last week outside the current top ten but outside that so "Good Luck Babe!" by Chappell Roan rose from 45 to 11, "Sailor Song"  by Gigi Perez climbed from 42 to 12, "Lose Control" by Teddy Swims continues to not live up to its name on the charts by jumping from 44 to 13.

Re-Entries

The re entries make up over three quarters of the chart this week so I'm only going to cover the re entries of songs from last year not older songs that probably should be rissoled off the chart if ARIA had some actual recurrency rules in place.

Lets start backward with "I like the way you kiss me" by Artemas at 50, "Prada" by Casso, Raye and D-Block Europe at 49, "Scared to Start"  by Michael Marcagi at 45, "Guess" by Charli XCX feat. Billie Eilish at 44, "End of Beginning" by Djo at 43, "Bed Chem" by Sabrina Carpenter at 42 and "Ain't No Love in Oklahoma" by Luke Combs at 41

Then there's "Bad Dreams" by Teddy Swims at 39, "Wildflower" by Billie Eilish at 38, "Pink Skies" by Zach Bryan at 37, "Million  Dollar Baby" by Tommy Richman at 35, "Hot to Go!" by Chappell Roan to 33 and "Stumblin' In" by Cyril (really should include Suzi Quatro and Chris Norman...) at 30,

At 29 is "The Door" by Teddy Swims, "I Love You, I'm Sorry" by Gracie Abrams at 22, "Please Please Please" by Sabrina Carpenter at 21, "Stick Season" by Noah Kahan at 20, "Stargazing" by Myles Smith at 19,  "Too Sweet" by Hozier clocked back in at 17, "Timeless" by The Weeknd and Playboi Carti at 16, "Luther" by Kendrick Lamar (and SZA) at 15 and FINALLY "Austin" by Dasha at 14.

New Entries

Four new entries this week and quite unbelievably, we're starting off with...

47. "Don't Stop Believin'" by Journey

Yeah, I am floored I am covering this in 2025 but as it turns out that even with this song considered a classic of 80s even with all the overplay, it wasn't a hit in its original run in Australia in 1981/1982, peaking at number 100 on the Kent Music Report charts and since then has been recording increasingly larger peaks outside the top 50 over the years until 2025 was the year it broke into the top 50. 

I am not going to shit on the song because it is an absolute classic that I know a lot of people absolutely adore and it got more fans courtesy of it being covered by ?Glee" and for many the song is a bit of an anthem but its just not a song that I have a personal attachment to as the lyrics strike me as weird anda the hook doesn't do as much for me at all.

46. "Linger (Sirius XM Sessions)" by Royel Otis 

So are we only going to acknowledge Royel Otis exist when they cover somebody else's songs now are we? Come on, they  have "Velvet" and "FOAM" which are two great songs from "Pratts and Pains" which deserve to be hits but okay putting all that aside, how is this cover of The Cranberries hit "Linger"?

It's fine however I don't think it's anything that would make me switch from the wonderful original where Dolores Riordan (may she rest in peace) just delivers an incredible vocal performance where as the vocals on this cover just don't hit the mark for me but again I stress, this cover isn't the worst thing I have ever heard, it just more feels inessential from a duo whose own music is better thsn this cover.

Just saying.

27. "...BMF" by SZA

So this is the only song that charted from the deluxe edition of "SOS" which is a bit of a surprise, would have thought "30 for 30" with Kendrick Lamar would have charted but oh well, we did end up getting one of the better songs from it even as it interpolates "Girl From Ipanema" on the hook (SZA, you aren't being slick with that and you aren't getting away with it!) but it's actually done well, it sounds like a breezy summer pop song, I will say that the interpolation might see some people getting annoyed with it if it sticks around but I like it. Check this out.

18. "The Days (NOTION Remix" by Chrystal, Not

Well, this feels a somewhat random breakthrough. Chrystal is a British singer hailing from Manchester, her song "Waves" attracted attention from BBC 1Xtra which garnered her comparisons to Lily Allen with this remix from UK dance artist Notion and well I really don't care that much for Notion's remix of the song, it just feels too busy and Chrystal vocals already remind me way too much of Bebe Rexha in the most annoying way possible...nasal and all so no, this isn't particularly good.

That's our week and yeah..."BMF" by SZA just runs away with the best of the week. Worst is going to "The Days (Notion Remix" by Chrystal and Notion. 

All 4 1994: January 9th: All For A New Year

 Yes, after two years, the retro charts are back for 2025, this time we're checking out the ARIA singles charts of 1994 and after the mediocrity of 1993, I am looking forward to seeing what 1994 has to offer and for the first chart of the year we have a rather quiet one on hand.

Unfortunately we are not off to a good start in our top ten because "Please Forgive Me" by Bryan Adams maintains number one for another week, it had reasonable sales week to see off the challenge of "Boom! Shake the Room" by DJ Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince which is a shame because "Please Forgive Me" is putrid shlock (see my worst hit songs of 1993).

The top three wound up fairly stable with former chart topper Ace of Base remaining at number three with "All That She Wants".

Salt 'N' Pepa moved up one place to number four with "Shoop" (a song that is fine but not my thing). At number five is a new entry with Bryan Adams, Rod Stewart and Sting collaborating on "All For Love", we'll get to the quality of the song later but it's here thanks to decent sales and this being a reasonably big event collab.

Jimmy Barnes collab with The Badloves "The Weight" remains a signpost of stability at number six while Radiohead's "Creep creeps up one spot to number seven.

"Got to Get It" by Culture Beat slipped back to number eight and looks set to fall further as M People climbed three places to hit the top ten at number nine. Finally Mariah Carey's ballad "Hero stayed steady at number ten.

Losses

 Alright, lets start as usual with our losers and we had two songs that took big tumbles out of the top ten with Urban Cookie Collective's "The Key. The Secret" plunging from number four to number eleven but they have a new single on the rise which we will get to in a moment while "Dreams" by Gabrielle dipped from nine to fifteen.

"Lemon" by U2 slid seven places to twenty and Kim Wilde's cover of "If I Can't have You" dropped nine to thirty

Culture Beat were one of the biggest losers of the week as "Mr. Vain" stumbled from eighteen to thirty one while "Somewhere" by Efua slipped from twenty seven to thirty five.

Rick Price and Margaret Urlich's collab "Where is the Love" seems appropriate hecause it fell nine places to number forty while "If I Had No Loot" by Tony! Toni! Tone! akidded down eight places to number forty three.

Finally the biggest song of 1993 "I'd Do Anything For Love (But I Won't Do That)" by Meatloaf fell twenty slots to forty four and "Angels" by John Farnham fell from thirty six to forty nine.

Re Entries

Just the one return this week with 4 Non Blondes back at number 46 with "What's Up?". 

Gains

So the underwhelming collab between Elton John and Kiki Dee "True Love" got a solid boost up nine spots to thirty four. Even worse Michael Bolton's "Said I Loved You...But I Lied" got an eight place gain to thirty two

Twenty 4 Seven's "Slave to the Music" feat Stay-C and Nance got one of the biggest gains this week though as it rocketed from forty six to twenty eight while Urban Cookie Collective thundered up twenty places to twenty four with "Feels Like Heaven" and Cut 'N' Move's cover of "Give It Up" sure did a LOT of moving up as it rocketed from forty one to nineteen this week. 

New Entries

Just the two new entries this week, starting with...

41. "Been Loving You Too Long" by Diesel

Ahh because 1994 needs to start with a cover of an Otis Redding song somehow, yet, I think Diesel does a good job here? Not saying this is better than the original...nothing tops Otis Redding but I would take this cover over Michael Bolton caterwauling through "Sitting on the Dock of the Bay" mostly because gives this song a somewhat understated vibe and I really do like that, it doesn't top the original but I mean we're talking Otis Redding for crying out loud! Diesel still does a good job, this is worth checking out unlike

5. "All For Love" by Bryan Adams, Rod Stewart and Sting

Well okay. this is a collab that should be really good even with the questionable quality of Bryan Adams current number one hit but it does have Rod Stewart and Sting on it, it being for the "Three Musketeers" movie and all so law of averages says this should be at least good, right? 

Well no, this song is everything I dislike about adult contemporary music where it's just flaccid cliches that are eye roll worthy, you could swear that the earnest version of Bon Jovi wrote this song and what is worse is that nobody on the song sounds remotely good here. At least the instrunental has some redeeming value even if the lyrics are banally vomit inducing.

Yeah it's worst of the week by default as we only have two songs here. Diesel gets best of the week for "Been Loving You Too Long"

ARIA New Singles Entry Review: November/December 2024.

 Hi everyone, final one of these ARIA singles new entry reviews because I am going to go full steam back into the weekly charts and because November was kind of slow, I'm going to combine both November and December as per last year mostly due to neither month being all that busy for new entries so we'll see. 

November

"Noid" by Tyler, The Creator

Ahh, the first taste of Tyler, the Creator's excellent new album "Chromakopia" and while this isn;t the best song from the album, it is still really damn good with that incredible guitar sample and Tyler just owing the story telling with his protagonist St Chroma trapped by persistent feelings of paranoia and being  watched ike he is in the The Truman show. Good song on an even better album, go check out "Chromakopia" if you haven't already

"Disease" by Lady Gaga

So Lady Gaga has apparently begun the roll out for her seventh album with this being the lead off single for her new album in 2025 and I cannot be the only person who at first thought lyrically this was just "The Cure" part 2 except less believeable and with darker instrumentation? Tyhat was the thought that came to my head after several listens. Look, this is fine enough but its not going to stick around and for Lady Gaga, that's a problem.

"Sao Paulo" by The Weeknd feat. Anitta

So I've got some major concerns about this upcoming The Weeknd album, "Dancing in the Flames" was mediocre and "Timeless" feat. Playboi Carti continues to be one of the more pointless songs Abel has released. so what would we get with this third single? Well, we might be about to get one hell of a messy album because this is basically a Brazillian funk song that plays more to the strenghs of Anitta than The Weekndbwho does sound out of his depth here, Decent but not much more than that

"Bed Chem" by Sabrina Carpenter

So I decided to throw this song in as it is one of the songs from the Sabrina Carpenter album that has stuck around and I did want to talk ahout as I really enjoy rhis song! Yeah, it's a goofy sex song which the title barely conceals the sexual innuendo at play here but there's something I like about the way Sabrina delivers her vocals here, she's having fun with this and she's got the personality to sell a rather silly song like this

"2 Hands" by Tate McRae

Ugh, time to talk about the newest Tate McRae song and...I hear the instrumental appeal behind this, it;s got a decent tension to it that I would back somebody like Ariana Grande or somebody else in that lane to sell but Tate McRae just does not have the personality to pull this sort of song where she wants this dude to put his two hands on her. I am going to forget this song exists in record time.

"Bad Dreams" by Teddy Swims

Teddy Swims won me back with :"The Door"...a song that I think is damn great and you know what? This is also pretty damn great! It's got this really good groove that makes his biggest hit "Lose Control" look even more incredibly stiff if that was even possible. I love the near reggae groove this song has as Teddy Swims sings about this love that if he lost her it would be a bad dream for him. This is really cute...hope this winds up a hit.

Worst of the Month: "2 Hands" by Tate McRae

Honourable Mention: "Noid" by Tyler. The Creator

Best of the Month: "Bad Dreams" bv Teddy Swims and 'Bed Chem" by Sabrina Carpenter.

December

"Luther" by Kendrick Lamar feat. SZA

Um, how do I talk about one of my favourite songs of the year? Seriously this song is in contention for my top 50 favourite songs of 2024...that's how much I love this. Kendrick Lamar and SZA are just absolute magic together especially on a flipped sample of a Luther Vandross song. The song seems to be about the affects of untreated trauma and acting in ways that nught give themselves some temporary relief from the feelings of the untreated trauma, it's definitely a song that Kendrick seemed to have needed given it's high placement on the tracklist but it's still a god damn great song on "GNX"...an album that is one of Kendrick's best,

"Defying Gravity" by Cynthia Erivo and Ariana Grande

Kind of surprised we didn't get more songs from "Wicked: The Movie" show up here but I am glad this one did because yeah this is absolutely fantastic..there's not too many who can go toe for toe with Ariana Grande but Cynthia Erivo as Elphaba just absolutely puts in an incredble performance on this song. This song is worth checking out even if you don't care for "Wicked'

"Ma Meilleure Ennemie" by Stromae and Pomme

On the other side of the ledger is this song from the "Arcane" movie coming from Stromae who is apparently bigger in Europe and has better songs than this mess that sounds like it's going to age pretty terribly with that clunky production. Nope, this one is not for me in the slightest. I'll be moving on.

"Messy" by Lola Young. 

So I have known of Lola Young for awhile, she's a British singer/songwriter hailing from South East London who released a pretty good sophomore album this year with this song probably being one of the best songs from that album, it's an indie pop rock song about a relarionship where this guy can't be straight with her and he wants one thing while expecting the other, she's getting frustrated with him and it's making the relationship murky or as she describes messy. All up, I like this and I doubt I need to give much encouragement for this to be a hit because I suspect it's on the way there.

"Toxic Til the End" by Rose

So "APT" has really grown on me and I am loooking forward to writing about that song come list time in January but until then we've got this new one and yeah, I don;'t like this one as much unfortunately, its got all the hallmarks of being a Taylor Swift knock off and we're starting to see a few way too many try to rip off Taylor's sound without writing or even the music too match. I'd skip this one.

Wsorst of the Month: "Ma Meilleure Ennemie" by Stromae and Pomme

Best of the Month: "Luther" by Kendrick Lamar with SZA

ARIA Singles Top 50 Singles: New Entry Review. October

 "Timeless" by The Weeknd feat. Playboi Carti

So here's The Weeknd's follow up to "Dancing in the Flames" and...well, I am genuinely starting to have concerns about this new album of Abel's because this is one heck of a mess and the Playboi Carti feature does not help this song what's so ever although when has a Playboi Carti feature heped any song ever so it shouldn't be a surprised that his feature here is completely useless and adds so very little to the song. as per is Playboi Carti's whole shtick.

Even The Weeknd sounds somewhat flat on this trap rap slog, I am going forget this song in record time because this is not good at all.     

"Baby I'm Back" by The Kid Laroi

It's never a good sign when a song starts with a rather promiment sample of "Baby Come Back" by Player and it's a sample that Kid Laroi just cannot ride the sample even on the hook of this song when he is desperately trying to convince this girl that he is back and will stick around for her.

In short, Anthony Fantano aka The Needledtop on Youtube said it best "Stop remaking classic songs into shit songs" and yeah, he is right because this is fucking unnecessary

"Embrace It" by Ndotz

Oh god. Australia, we are not going to follow the USA's trend of enabling random rappers to chart, right?  Turns out Ndotz is a British rapper with Angolan heritage but Dave or Stormy this guy isn't because yeah, this guy's rapping sounds terrible with an even more annoying beat that's nothing more than a collection of beeping.

Oh and the content is nothing more than vapid rapping about women and vulgar sex references that don't make the song anywhere near close to attractive especially with that awful beat that would any woman off sexy time. In short, this is unnecessary and gross. Next!

"Sympathy Is A Knife" by Charli XCX feat. Ariana Grande

Last song from BRAT that I'll have to cover on the blog and yeah this is one that having heard the original I didn't care for all that much and this renix kind of makes this song worse especially as it becomes about whinging about the media attention Ariana's been getting etc. Not bad but definitely not good either.

"Thick Of It" by KSI feat. Trippie Redd

My time is better served by talking songs that are actually worth something not junk like this. Absolute garbage and Trippie Redd, you should know better.

"APT" by Rose feat. Bruno Mars

Well this is a pairing I wasn't at all expecting, a member of Blackpink teaming up with master of the throwback sound Bruno Mars who is fresh off the back of a collab with Lady Gaga and I have to say I am glad this song has had time to grow on me because when I first heard "APT" I was not a fan at all but it's grown on me in recent weeks mostly because I hear it on the radio A LOT and maybe a case of Stockholm Syndrome, yes the drums sound a little compressed and maybe overmixed but it wouldn't be a crime to deny just how fun and catchy this soug is and just how much a renix with Avril Lavigne would go off but as it is Bruno is just fine and this works as a 2000s throwback..check it out!

"Love Somebody" by Morgan Wallen

So look, I am going to say what I said about Morgan Wallen on Twitter a week or so ago. Wallen is a mediocre to awful artist who piggy backed to fame because people felt sorry for him over the 'n- word' scandal which is how the god awful "Last Night" became a thing and while he has one or two good to great songs, a lot of the singles he has released have absolutely sucked (see my worst hit songs of 2023 list) or been mediocre at best and "Love Somebody" falls into the latter camp of forgettable mediocre shlock to the point where if you had told me it was a Maroon 5 knock off I wouldn't question you! Ity just sounds so hollow and sterile ...blergh.

"That's So True" by Gracie Abrams

Speaking of mediocre, Gracie Abrams new single and I guess it's somewhat tolerable compared to previous efforts but again she isn't a unique voice or presence on the pop landscape and here because happened to get the Taylor Swift endorsement package like Sabrina Carpenter did but eh this song is fine enough, the hook is memorable enough...I guess.

Worst of the Month: "Thick of It" by KSI and Trippie Redd

Dishonourable Mention: "Embrace It" by Ndotz

Honourable MentIon: Nothing good enough to deserve this slot

Best of the Month: "APT" by Rose and Bruno Mars

ARIA New Entry Review: September 2024

 "Sailor Song" by Gigi Perez

So this one is kind of interesting as Gigi Perez is an American singer/songwriter who notched her first ARIA singles charting song courtesy of it going viral and given my history with viral songs being rocky at best...I was concerned about what we'd get from this but as it turns out we got a decent torch song out of it! I don't precisely love it, the details feel a bit too broadly sketched but I won't mind if it sticks around. Good song.

"The Emptiness Machine" by Linkin Park

Oh boy, I was dreading having to review this song because there is no easy way to talk about the return of Linkin Park given the death of lead singer Chester Bennington and now the controversy around new lead singer Emily Armstrong and her contentious religious beliefs because the controversy kind of overshadowed the song a bit however it makes sense because "The Emptiness Machine' is basically a nothing of a song that really takes away from the talents of the band members other than Armstrong, why is Mike Shinoda singing when he is a better rapper than singer? The instrumental also just sounds stale...like the band are trying on a shoe that just doesn't quite fit. I think forgetting this song exists might be the best thing for everyone.

"It's Ok I'm Ok" by Tate McRae

So Tate McRae is clearly trying to fill the hole in 2020s pop music that was left by Britney Spears and yet I am left weirdly annoyed by her newest single which somehow bas less flavour than that of cardboard or dry museli because at least Britney had a deal of charisma but Tate McRae cannot sell this at all and the hook might the most annoying hook on a song I've heard all damn year. Yeah, Tate McRae keeps striking out for me,,,,next!

"Dancing In The Flames" by The Weeknd

The return of The Weeknd fels one of the biggest events of the back of half of this year which is in part why I am tonr on this opening salvo for his upcoming new album and honestly? I am not that impressed, the song sounds like a pale facsimile of songs that The Weeknd has done better in the past, the instrumental doesn't represent what dancing in those flames represent in terms of danger, it almost feels weirdly to fluffy coming from The Weeknd of all people so yeah not a fan of this and I wanted to be.

"Talk Talk" by Charli XCX feat. Troye Sivan

So this is a song for Charli XCX's Brat remix album and given this is actually one of the songs from Brat that I was not a fan of (Yes, I have heard "BRAT"...I get the appeal but it's just not for me) and yeah, this just doesn't work, it just sounds like a pile up of noise that neither Charli or Troye sound good over. Think I'll be moving on from this.

"Diet Pepsi" by Addison Rae

 Oh god. We really are now so bereft of pop stars that we turn to some social media personality turned wannabe singer Addison Rae for a song that tries to evoke diet Lana Del Rey vibes and while this per isn't terrible, it sure does make me want to go back to Lana Del Rey's last album and listen to that instead. 

Worst of the Month: "It's Ok I'm Ok" by Tate McRae 

Best of the Month: "Sailor Song" by Gigi Perez (A rough month overall and this wouldn't get BOTM in an otherwise stronger month but the song is pretty good)

ARIA Singles Chart New Entry Review: August 2024.

 "Guy For That" by Post Malone feat. Luke Combs

Third time's the charm with regard to this country album Post Malone is rolling out, right? "I Had Some Help" feat. Morgan Wallen has only gotten more shrill and insubstantial since it's release and while "Pour Me A Drink" feat. Blake Shelton was marginally better however forgettable it is but again, there's apart of me wondering if Posty is pulling on a few too many old country tropes, well thankfully this song isn't about drinking, it's more about how he has people for fixing things like flat tyres etc but when it comes to fixing a broken heart..there's no one that can do that for this girl. 

Now this song has problems, its too short and could have afforded a third verse and a bridge plus why does Post Malone's vocal pick up sound so choppy and why is Post allowing Luke Combs to just steal the show from him on a song that's for his album? Overall the song isn't terrible but it's by no means good either.

"Guess" by Charli XCX feat. Billie Eilish

2024 is almost certainly the year of being incredibly horny and Brat so when Charli XCX invited Billie Eilish onto a remix of this song which is all about underwear and what Charli has got going on "down there" and yeah...it god damn works better as a duet than it did as a Charli XCX solo song. Billie absolutely nails the incredibly horny vibe of the song with her verse  claiming the underwear being worn is a pair brought in Tokyo...fucking love this. Check it out.                                                                                                                    

"Big Dawgz" by Hunamankind and Kalmi\

So Indian rap has crossed over to the charts with this song from Indian rapper Hunamankind and his producer Kalmi and you know I do hear the appeal with the warping instrumentation courtesy of the production from Kalmi but Hunamankind's vocals just don't do anything for me and when the lyrics don't do any heavy lifting...yeah...I'm going to move on real quick from this. 

"Apple" by Charli XCX

The slow drip of songs charting from "Brat" has been interesting to say to the least especially as this is probably one of the better songs from the album to have charted, probably because it reminds me the most of the early 90s big beat era and Charli XCX is introspectively exploring the relationship between her, parents and the rest of her family. I dig this, check it out even if like me you are having an "Well, there is other music" winter. 

"Backbone" by Chase & Status feat. Stormzy

So Chaase and Status are a UK electronic duo who have gotten a lot of praise from UK critics for their production work and that is certainly true here as the production on this song has a lot of bite and menace to it, it certainly sounds intimidating but then there's the track's guest feature and why this song has gotten so big out of the blue...Stormzy. I am sorry but his vocals do not add to the menacing or intimidating atmosphere set by Chase and Status especially when tbe lyrics are mostly just empty as hell flexing. I'll take the instrumental and move on. 

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"I Love You, I'm Sorry" by Gracie Abrams

Oh yay, another Gracie Abrams track hitting the charts and it's just not very good at all. on between the clingy "I just cannot get over you, I still love you" and yet it comes across as bland and cookie cutter as oatmeal biscuitsand cardboard. It just sounds like bog standard indie nonsense that got cut to ribbons in the 2010s, Pass. 

"Die With A Smile" by Lady Gaga and Bruno Mars

In the early 2010s, this collab probably would have seen erections so big in the music industry, sales of Viagra would have probably taken a dip however in 2024, there's been an oddly sedate reaction to Lady Gaga and Bruno Mars finally getting on a song together and it's hard to gage why especially as Lady Gaga hasn't really been that active in the music scene since Chromatica in 2020, you'd think people would be chomping at the bit for new Lady Gaga music 

All that preamble to say that I absolutely love this song, yeah, the song is a bit too squeaky clean to really pull off the throwback but this harmonies connect even if I think Bruno is a tad too loud in the mix but yeah this works as something of a pop/rock power balla. It's worth giving a chance, check it out.

"Taste" by Sabrina Carpenter

So I haven't heard all of Sabrina Carpenter's new album "Short 'n' Sweet" but I have been able to hear this song on the radio and via streaming and I think this song might be the best of the three singles more because it's got this coursing guitar on the verses that I am actually a sucker for however I will also add that it does sound like a "great value" Olivia Rodrigo song that Olivia would perform vocally with much greater hitting impact than Sabrina does, in any case, it's still good, check it out. 

"Kisses by Bl3ss x CamrinWatson feat. bbyclose"

So I cannot find any information about any of the artists involved in this song. I'm not surprised this is charting either it sounds like something that is pretty Brat by Charli XCX adjacent except without the swagger or punch that puts the aong over the top especially those vocals that sound like they had a child filter put over her voice. Other than that and some pretty generic lyrics that I forgot moments after hearing them, there's just not much to this song, Time to move on.

"The Door" by Teddy Swims

Oh look it's the better of the two Teddy Swims singles, thankfully "The Door" isn't as stiff and as controlled as "Lose Control" and does have a looser vibe to it which Teddy Swims can play into a lot more convincingly The content of this song is incredibly dark with Swims singing about walking out and getting away fron an abusive relationship in order to save his own life and yeah this one does hit hard. Damn good song that deserves to be a bigger hit than "Lose Control" ever was. Please check this out!

Worst of the Month: "I Love you, I'm Sorry" by Gracie Abrams

Honourable Mention: "The Door" by Teddy Swims, "Guess" by Charli XCX and Billie Eilish

Best of the Month: "Die With A Smile" by Lady Gaga and Bruno Mars

ARIA Singles New Entry Review: July 2024. Brat! The Month of the Unwanted Comebacks

"Us" by Grace Abrams feat. Taylor Swift

I have absolutely no interest in checking out that new Gracie Abrams album. I haven't been at all impressed with the singles but maybe there would be something that could make me change my mind and look, it did come with the Taylor Swift feature so maybe I had some hope. Well no,...because this sounds like a song that was scrapped by Swift during the making of "The Tortured Poets Departmeht" and is nowhere near as interesting. Fast forward this one.

"Devil is A Lie" by Tommy Richman

So we are going to make Tommy Richman a thung now, "Million Dollar Baby" is a fine enough song but I was curious as to what Richman would follow it up with and we got "Million Dollar Baby" part 2. Richman has a formula and he is going to stick with it come hell or high water and as a result, I don;'t really care for this as much as "Million Dollar Baby", it's kind of weak.

"Pour Me A Drink" by Post Malone feat. Blake Shelton

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Second go around with "country" Post Malone and this apparent flirt with country, this time trading out Morgan Wallen for Blake Shelton and this is a little better even if Posty and Blake have very little by way of vocal interplay in a song where they are begging for somebody to pour them a drink. Ehh...it's fine enough but nothing to write home about.,..that's all. 

"Nights Like This" by The Kid Laroi

We could have moved on from this Juice WRLD carbon copy with worse vocals, Australia, we really could have but truth be told The Kid Laroi is doing a manful job of being an Aussie on the ARIA singles chart right now but this is still somewhat of a generic Juice WRLD sounding dud. We could have done without a Kid Laroi comeback.

"Girl, So confusing" by Charli XCX feat. Lorde 

So  I haven't listened to "BRAT" apart from the songs that hit the ARIA singles chart, Charli's music just doesn't do much for me generally so I have avoided it so to not rain on the parade of those having a BRAT summer or winter but this charted courtesy of a remix featuring Lorde and yeah, this is actually pretty damn good, mostly because it addresses some issues that had gone on between Charli and Lorde. Check this song out even if you are like me and having a non Brat season

"Girls" by The Kid Laroi

The second Kid Laroi song this month and I'll give it this, that hook is somewhat catchy but that's not saying much when The Kid Laroi has the enthusiasm of stiff cardboard in his vocal delivery. This actually could have been really good but just winds up being thoroughly mediocre so yeah, I am hitting fast forward on this one

"Hot To Go!" by Chappell Roan

Its weird how easily Chappell Roan songs from "The Rise and Fall of a Midwest Princess" have crossed over to the Billboard Hot 100...seriously both "Red Wine Supernova" and "Pink Pony Club" are flying up the Hot 100 yet "Hot to Go!" is the only song to cross over to the ARIA top 50 in Australia, what gives, Aussies? Anyway, this song is not the best on the album but it's still really damn good and Chappell is just absolutely brilliant on here, it's still worth checking out as is the whole album.

"Misses" by Dominic Fike

Oh speaking of unwanted comebacks...Dominic Fike is back on the charts with this mess that sounds utterly terrible that tries to be sincere in the lyrics but winds up dripping in less sincerity than a damn Donald Trump rally speech. It's also noticeably undercooked in the production. Yeah, this is another fast forward...time to move on from this junk

"Lies Lies Lies" by Morgan Wallen

Sigh...Kind of disappointed that Morgan Wallen didn't release a song called "Chairs Chairs Chairs" given what he is currently confronting in his private life but we get this instead and it's fine...I guess?  Wallen has worse songs out there (*glares at "Thinkin' 'bout Me"*). Its a song about where Wallen is admitting that he is lying about  his drinking habits and behaviour to his partner because addiction is hard to get over. This isn't as bad as it could have been, check it out if you are curious.

"Tobey" by Eminem feat Big Sean and Babytron

So Eminem did indeed get an album bomb for his new album but this will be the only song I am going to be covering from it because yeah...I did not care for the album at all but "Tobey" was one of the better songs from the album and that's literally not because of Eminem himself but because of  both Big Sean and Babytron, both of whom deliver focussed and somewhat punchy verses to the point I am curious for what Big Sean has coming! Overall, this is pretty solid but nothing spectacular.

"Tough" by Quavo feat. Lana Del Rey

This was an unexpected collab and definitely one that gave me "This is going to be a mess" vibes going in and well...it's fine? The song lyrically feels a bit overwritten which kind of makes sense when you realize that a fourteen year old aspiring country singer is one of the co writers but otherwise the instrumentation is kind of pretty and Quavo and Lana have some decent chemistry, it's solid, check it out if you are curious

"Kehlani" by Jordan Adetunji

It kind of sucks a song using Kehlani's name in the title charts but nothing from Kehlani's mostly decent last album hasn't charted especially as I don't think this is anything worth caring about especially as this is just a song where this UK based rapper is trying to hook up with a girl he compares to Kehlani somehow and I don't know, the song just feels overall skeevy, I am going to forget this exists if it doesn't creep me out.

"28" byZach Bryan

Considering that male singer/songwriter types are currently what is appealing to the audience, I am kind of sad that more of "The Great American Bar Scene" didn't cross over especially as the album is pretty damn great with "28" being one of the stand out cuts from the album but it's also the song that sounds really close to Jason Isbell and that is a massive compliment! Zach Bryan reminiscing about loveless birthdays and now finally feeling content with somebody he loves, damn great song. 

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"360" by Charli XCX

Another song from Brat and this one is actually better than "Girl, so confusing", mainly because the song is short and catchy, there's a punch to this that WORKS so damn well and Charli sounds great over this. Ehh...what else can I say, this one works for me. Nice one , Charli.

Worst of the Month: "Nights Like This" by The Kid Laroi

Dishonourable Mention: "Misses" by Dominic Fike

Honourable Mention: "Hot To Go!: by Chappell Roan

Best of the Week: "28" by Zach Bryan

ARIA New Singles Review: June 2024.

"Pink Skies" by Zach Bryan

So the timing of this review is interesting considering I am writing this in the same week that Zach Bryan releases his new album "The Great American Bar Scene" with this song being the lead single for it and...I really like this! Sure, it's not Zach's best but it is a somewhat raw song where he is describing attending a funeral and a series of events that happened at this funeral and yeah the more stripped back arrangement does lend the song some weight and pathos, I like it, keen to hear the album.

"Band4Band" by Central Cee and Lil Baby

So I guess we were due to have a Central Cee song hit the charts in 2024, only this time he brought along Lil Baby and I have to be honest, there's really not much to this, its just Central Cee and Lil Baby basically whining and flexing over another lazy beat. Central Cee kicks off the song complainung about flights being delayed for goodness sake. Either way, this is really forgettable...let's move on.

"Houdini" by Eminem

Oh look, its return of Eminem and he is touting the death of his alter ego Slim Shady for this new album cycle, this time with a song that bares the same title as a Dua Lipa song earlier this year...and I am not going to mince words...this sucks and in ways that are hard to quantify but let's start with that sample of Steve Miller Band's terrible 1982 hit "Abracadabra" which sounds somewhat downtuned while Eminem makes a Megan Thee Stallion being shot joke and some really other cringey bars around trans people and others...ugh...this is garbage, See my worst list at the end of the year for this song.

"Please Please Please" by Sabrina Carpenter

Ahh, a reprieve from the mediocre to outright nonsense hitting the charts this month because it's time to deal with the new Sabrina Carpenter single. "Espresso" has only gotten more annoying and insubstantial everytime I have heard it...a decent if over mixed groove doesn't go far enough to hide the song's obvious flaws. I will say that "Please Please Please" is somewhat better in that the groove isn't as over produced and it does sound like a 60s bubblegum song with a more modern twist but again I am left struggling with Sabrina's vocals which hit between an Ariana Grande coo and so sugar sweet that if a person can give you diabetes by singing...this song would. I don't mind the song but overplay might kill it for me.

"Close to You" by Gracie Abrams

So we jump from one Taylor Swift tour opening act to another, while I have liked one or two songs from Gracie Abrams, I have never been impressed by her that much so this was an opportunity to win me over and unfortunately this doesn't do it for me, it sounds like a really horrendous Instagram or Tik Tok song for teenage girls who think they are so edgy because they shop at Supre or Forever 21 but is so gummy that it lacks any bite whatsoever. I'll forget about this in record time.

"The Man He Sees In Me" by Luke Combs

So I have been a bit surprised with just how quick Luke Combs has released a new album this year, you'd think with the success of the "Fast Car" cover, he'd sit back and take a break but no, in stead we got that song for the Twisters movie soundtrack and now this song for his new album about father-son relationships and yeah, this hits hard even with it not being my favourite from the album, it's a song that where Luke sings about wondering what kind of man his sons see him to be and hoping he is living in a manner where they see him in a good way. Great song, definitely check out the album!

"High Road" by Koe Wetzel feat. Jessie Murph 

Just me or is Jessie Murph doing a lot of country or country adjacent features this year? She's got that song with Jelly Roll and now this with Texas country star Koe Wetzel and yeah...this sucks, for a lovr song, it just sounds curdled and sour and Jessie Murph doesn't really add much to it so yeah this is absolutely a skip.

Worst of the Mionth: "Houdini" by Eminem

Dishonourable Mention: High Road" by Koe Wetzel feat. Jessie Murph

Honourable Mention: "Pink Skies" by Zach Bryan

Best of the Month: "The Man He Sees In Me" by Luke Combs.

ARIA Singles Chart New Entry Review: April/May. A serving of nasty ugly rap beef.

 "Like That" by Future and Metro Boomin feat. Kendrick Lamar

This is a diss track aimed at Drake where Kendrick Lamar pretty much goes off on Drake which has triggered one hell of a rap beef with it feels like everyone in rap piling in on Drake (we'll get to one such song later) and the song really does circulate around that one verse from Kendrick where he just takes aim at Drake and J Cole's song "First Person Shooter" and sets in train for what was to come. Overall not bad but it really does now feel like a scene setter...

"Million Dollar Baby" by Tommy Richman

Ahh here we go, Tik Tok blasts another one to chart success, this time, Tommy Richman who is an American rapper, singer and songwriter with this being his break out hit and look, I do actually get the appeal of this, it sounds like a song that has been around for years and could have come out in the 60s or 70s but man, does it sound like it was made with the TikTok crowd in mind. I don't hate this but I also don't really love it, not going to complain if this disappears to be honest.

"Good Luck, Babe!" by Chappell Roan

I've known about Chappell Roan for awhile now, she's an American midwest pop act who definitely has a bit of that theatre burlesque type presence who released her debut album "The Rise and Fall of a Mid West Princess" last year to a lot of critical praise and since toured with Olivia Rodrigo (they share the same producer in Danuel Nigro) with this song appearing to be a loose single to capitalise on attention from touring with Olivia and...yeah, while this is not better than "Red Wine Supernova", "Pink Pony Club" or "Casual", it's still really damn good with Roan looking back on how a secret relationship with another woman fell apart because of this idea of enforced heteronormativity aka man and woman. 

Also does anyone else hear the Kate Bush influence in this song? I sure do, Check this song out. 

"Euphoria" by Kendrick Lamar

So for the next few songs we are dealing with songs from the biggest rap beef possibly ever with Kendrick Lamar firing this shot at Drake and honestly...it might be the best of the disses that charted as Kendrick switches up his flow to warn Drake that if he continues to lie about Kendrick's family and Kendrick himself than the truth about Drake will be put out there and it won't just be subs thrown either as these two have been doing for years now. The atmosphere around the production from here also feels truly menacing and a definite sign that things were about to get quite real...

So low and behold...

"Family Matters"  by Drake

And from here, this is where the beef gets uncomfortably nasty because holy hell, do the accusations fly here and there are some really funny bars but Drake really isn't beating around the bush with the allegations of domestic abuse aimed directly at Kendrick  but along the way hitting out at Future, Metro Boomin, Rick Ross and The Weeknd to the point that instead of being laser pointed on Kendrick, it has the feel of Drake firing at all comers from the corner and while it's not bad and Kendrick hasn't really responded to the claims Drake made...Drake could have done better with a more focussed and refined verse,

"Meet The Grahams"  by Kendrick Lamar

Less than an hour after Drake released "Family Matters", Kendrick fired back with a murky piano sample where he addresses Drake's family one by one including his son, parents, a secret daughter and then Drake himself and this song gets really uncomfortable right from the get go because Kendrick opens the song with "Dear Adonis, I am sorry that that man is your father, let me be honest"...like whoa if somebody come up to me and said that about my dad, I'd be horrified but that's not the worst of it as Kendrick goes in hard on these accusations that Drake takes drugs and is a paedophile on verses aimed at Drake's parents, directs a lot of sympatby to a daughter that Drake apparently has before addressing Drake himself and accusing Drake of lying about everything from his religious views to the existence of this child, It's a song that I honestly skip because it's not an easy song to listen to at all. 

"Not Like Us" by Kendrick Lamar

So I am going to stress this because I think it bares so worth saying for as much as I love Mustard's beat here and some of the quotable lines here, I am not comfortable with this song at all especially as Kendrick doubles down on the allegations of Drake being a paedophile. hanging out with a crew of alleged paedophiles in the OVO bubble and how Drake rode on the backs of other rappers to get where he is now. The funny bars are rampant here with "certified lover boy, certified paedophiles", "why you trolling like a bitch, ain't you tired, tryna strike a chord and it's probably a minor" and "Lemme hear you say Ovhoe" but yeab, this song is still nasty and creates this discomfort watching people party to this song given its content. Don't be a surprised if even for as much as I like it, it's not on my best list at the end of the year, just saying,

"I Had Some Help" by Poat Malone and Morgan Wallen

Now we're out the other side of the rap beef, lets deal with the big new hit from Post Malone who is going country and bringing with him the chairs of the roofs of bars slinger Morgan Wallen with him and I have to be honest here because this song is just mediocre at best, it's a song all about how this other person in their lives is enabling their alcohol addiction, shame the verses are sing songy to the point of annoying and Morgan Wallen still sounds distractingly nasal on any song he is on, Yeah, I am going to hope for better from Post Malone. 

"Stargazing" by Myles Smith

Myles Smith is a British folktronica singer and songwriter with this song being his break out and hit and...I wish I cared for it as much as everyone else does, I mean it's fine but it just does nothing for me. I'd rather Avicii instead. 

"Lunch' by Billie Eilish

You know, it's interesting to remember how scandalised certain sections of the world were by Cardi B and Megan Thee Stallion's "WAP" back in 2020 that I was expecting far right Christian fundamentalists lash Billie Eilish for this great and very funny song dedicated to eating this girl out for lunch and that she dances on  the tip of Billie's tongue. I guess when its as fun and as catchy as this...I don't blame the fundies for grooving to this. 

"Birds of a Feather"  by Billie Eilish

This is one of my favourite songs from that new Billie Eilish album because I just love how good Billie sounds over this production. Just a pretty song that leaves me with not much toi say to some degree except that the lyrics play to the notion that Billie wants this other person to stay with her until they die except unlike James Arthur in 2017, she doesn't overplay her hand. Damn good song that I am glad is sticking around.

"Ain't No Love in Oklahoma' by Luke Combs

So for some reason the culture has decided we need a new Twisters movie with this song being the first from the very country line up to be released by Luke Combs and look it's a respectfully good stab at coimtry rock song however this makes me think the people behind the soundtravk really wanted Chris Stapleton

Worst of the Month: Nothing too terrible this month. I'll give it to "Stargazing" by Myles Smith I guess.

Honourable Mention: "Birds of a Feather" ties with "Lunch" both by Billie Eilish

Best of the Month: "Good Luck, Babe" by Chappell Roan

ARIA New Entry Review: April 2024

So because this month is overloaded with new entries and this thing is beyond long, I decided to move like "Like That" by Future and Metro Boomin feat. Kendrick Lamar and the last week of April in with May ARIA singles new entry review so look out for that one...in the mean time enjoy the rest of the April reviews starting with...

"Too Sweet" by Hozier

Okay, Hozier back on tbe charts is a sjght to behold and even better "Too Sweet" is a damn great song! It has an incredible groove and swagger to it and Hozier is absolutely playing it up by saying this girl he is with is just too sweet for him. It reminds me a lot of INXS in some ways except Michael Hutchence would absolutely amp up the sex appeal a little more than Hozier does here but damn this song is too damn catcby and it's right there as one of the best songs on the charts right now. Check this out

"Obsessed" by Olivia Rodrigo

So this was the only song from the deluxe edition of "GUTS" to hit the ARIA singles chart which is a shame because all five new songs from that deluxe edition are really good to great and I consider "Obsessed" to fall into that great category! Olivia again shows a particular lack of dignity here where she's obsessed with everything to do with this guy's ex and how perfect this guy's ex is possibly from this guy still being in love with this girl because Olivia knows he is still in love with her. Combine the rather obsessive lyrics, the monster hook and instrumentation that knows how to kick it up a gear when necessary and you have one hell of a song! Check this out.

"I Like The Way You Kiss Me" by Artemas

So British singer songwriter and producer Artemas has hit the ARIA singles chart with this particular song and well...given the quality of the songs above it...I am not a fan, I don't know...it just feels oddly soulless which comes from the very 80s production which reminds me of A Flock of Seagulls in a way with the synths but yeah, I don't get much out of listening to this song. Next!    

"II Most Wanted by Beyonce and Miley Cyrus

So "Cowboy Carter" got a rather muted chart presence with this unsurprisngly being the biggest song to hit the chart from the release of the album and yeah, this song is absolutely beautiful. Beyonce calling in Miley for a role on this song makes so much sense given Miley's links to country and wow, they sound phenomenal together on a gentle guitar and piano ballad about friendship and being each other's shotgun rider til the day they die. It's in a battle for best of the month but it's right up there.

"Slow It Down" by Benson Boone

What is not right up there is this garbage, my god this sounds terrible, This is Benson Boone chasing a second hit in the wake of the shrieking disaster that is "Beautiful Things" and...ughhh...can we just stop making this guy a thing and give Ed Sheeran some more hits from "Equals"? "Tides" would be a better hit than this garbage.

"Magnetic" by Illit

Am I the only one surprised at the lack of K-pop cross overs this year? Well, Illit are a South Korean all girl group that emerge through a sub branch of HYBE and now they have their first ever charting song in Australia, just wish I didn't find the vocals kind of annoying, you've got this incredibly energetic production mixed with whiny vocals and it grated on my nerves especially as it feels like with lyrics about being attracted to someone, the vocals could have been less annoying...next!

"Belong Together" by Mark Ambor

So another American singer songwriter breaking through, this time Mark Ambor and well, this is better than Benson Boone...thank goodness but mostly because rather than being bad, its just forgettable...it's likely a cut that Ed Sheeran, Hozier or even Shaboozey could do better with

"If U Think I'm Pretty" by Artemas

Second go round with Artemas so lets see how we go with this song...and nope, this isn't good either with this just being this collection of grating noises that at least somebody like Finneas could make sound less annoying for Billie Eilish but nope this is just grating noise that Artemas is trying to sing over with all the personality of wallpaper. Next!

"Where the Wild Things Are" by Luke Combs

I am glad this at least got a week on the ARIA singles top 50 because this a damn great song and one of the best from Luke's album last year. Yeah, it's got the neo traditional country production of all the best Luke Combs songs but what strikes all the more power is the story Combs is telling the story of his brother who invited him along on these adventures motorbiking in California and partying while Luke admits that he is loving it but this, sadly the song reveals that Combs brother died in a motorbike accident however it is refreshing that the song doesn't wallow in the death but reflects and celebrates that motorbiking is what the brother loved doing and if that was the way he went out so be it. Great song.

"Back on 74" by Jungle

Well this was something of a surprise! Jungle are a British dance music project who have gotten a lot of critical attention in the past with this song being released last year getting some viral attention and yeah, this is pretty damn good! I love the melody and for once a dance song has an actual fucking groove. Just it's got a lot of competition for best of the month.

"Espresso" by Sabrina Carpenter

So this is the big Sabrina Carpenter single that seems to have gained a massive groundswell of traction with the publicand yeah, it's easy to hear why, the song has this retro and somewhat glossy sound that reminds me of "Say So" by Doja Cat and when the lyrics are basically her bragging about her being akin to an espresso for her new boyfriend. Its fine but like most coffees you'll eventually want something that quenches your thirst.

"Illusion" by Dua Lipa.

So I have liked the first two singles from Radical Optimism and I was hoping this would be another Dua Lipa home run and....it's not? I don't know I just don't feel anything from this song other than this queasiness that comes with the odd way Dua Lipa sings the word 'illusion'. Definitely not the song that I go back to from "Radical Optimism"

"Tell Ur Girlfriend" by Lay Bankz

Oh good lord, so Lay Bankz is an American rapper and singer hailing from Pbiladelphia, Pennsylvania with this song being her first to hit the ARIA singles chart and I hate saying this but I hated this song right from the outset...why? Because of that goddamn sample of "Pony" by Ginuwine where it sounds like a guy burping and it just distracts from the song entirely. This is pretty bloody awful.

"Hell 'n' Back" by Bakar

It's about damn time this turned up on the Australian singles chart! It was a hit in New Zealand in 2019 but never crossed over to Australia until 2024. Bakar is an English singer that has been quietly gaining traction in the UK and elsewhere, now it's charting in the top 50 in Australia thanks to a Summer Walker remix and no surprise given I was listening to this song pre the remix, it's a pretty great little R'n'B number where Bakar describes finding love and is now healing from a past where he was hitting rock bottom. Great song. Check this out1

Worst of the Month: "Slow It Down" by Benson Boone

Dishonourable Mention: "Tell Ur Girlfriend" by Lay Bankz

Honourable Mentions: "Hell 'N' Back" by Bakar feat. Summer Walker, "Obsessed" by Olivia Rodrigo

Best of the Week: "Too Sweet" by Hozier, "Where the Wild Things" are by Luke Combs.

The Super Short Top Ten Worst Hit songs of 2023

 I have decided to ditch doing a full on worst list for 2023, mostly because we've all moved on, I have no will power to revisit any of these crappy songs and most of the bad songs from 2023 will npt have any kind of staying power apart from a few unfortunate exceptions.

Before we briefly go tip diving, here's a reminder of the rules, a song can qualify for this list if it first appearedon the 2023 ARIA year end or was higher on the 2023 year end than it did on the 2022 year end, also this list is not definitive, it's just my opinion. 

10. "Flowers" by Miley Cyrus (I remember being so excited for this song's release, hearing a song that sounded so bland and cookie cutter and feeling disappointed, Miley, you are better than this, Bring back the "Plastic Hearts" Miley please)

9. "Players" by Coi Leray (Look, Coi Leray has got talent but like Miley, she wastes it on lazy sampling this time using an iconic 80s song from Grandmaster Flash with some pretty terrible lyrics about how girls do the exact same thing as guys,...come on...,it's just lame at this point, Coi)

8. "Green Green Grass"  by George Ezra (What on earth was this? A song aimed for Dulux colour chart ads, Bob Ross or Play School. This was a massive disappointment from George Ezra who I frankly expected better of than this shit).

7. "Popular" by The Weeknd feat. Playboi Carti and Madonna (The music from the Idol pretty much matches the TV show. None of the trio involved with this disaster of a song gives a good performance here, if anything it exposed how overexposed The Weeknd is).

6. "You Proof" by Morgan Wallen (Wow, this song sure sounds like what I would imagine a stomache virus would sound like. Not only is the song sour but Morgan Wallen sounds so fucking insufferably smug on this song that I want to throw things if the song didn't sound so damn lethargic)

5. "Let Go" by Central Cee (When you take a terrible 2013 Passenger song and make it worse and with this dude getting features on other mediocre rappers albums, we might not be rid of him. Just lovely...not)

4. "Daylight" by David Kushner (Okay so Australia wanted Hozier in 2023 but went for a bad rip off instead of anything from that Hozier album last year and now that Hozier is back, we have no need for anymore of these hacky rip offs)

3. "The Color Violet" by Tory Lanez (Well, this is awkward considering Tory Lanez is now serving prison time, Only wish people could get prison time for songs like this one that blow so much ass!)

2. "Rich Flex" by Drake and 21 Savage (Ugh, "Her Loss" is easily Drake's worst album to date and while "Rich Flex" is not the worst song on the album, it is emblematic of the issues with that album in that most of it hides behind misogyny and gunplay. It's pathetic, Drake, you are capable of better.)

The number one worst hit song of 2023:

"Last Night" by Morgan Wallen

This wasn't going to be my number one for awhile...it didn't feel like the hit song I hated the most in 2023 until I realized that "Last Night" is basically the tail end of Luke Bryan's "That's My Kind of Night"...drunken sloppy sex and all is remembered is car tail lights disappearing in the dust while all Wallen can remember is that he and this woman let the liquor talk last night in between the sex and presumable fighting.

What drives the song into the ground though is how utterly miserable this song is on an instrumental basis because this can barely be called country with that down tuned guitar and Wallen's whiny nasal vocals that make the song a completely niserable listening experience.

New Entry Review: March 2024

"Saturn" by SZA 

A brand new SZA single as a lead off to "LANA" and I was looking forward to this mostly because while SZA has never grabbed me with a full album, she does have songs that I adore (my 2023 best list will feature one such song) so how was "Saturn"?

Oh good lord, this is right up there as one of the best songs on the charts right now, I love how the song opens with what sounds like a merimba and SZA just sounds imcredible, The song is just incredibly easy to listen to and go back to. The lyrrics hit on feelings of feeling like everything is terrible and trying to find something better even if that something better requires SZA and her partner to leave and go to that other place so yeah this is fucking great!

?End of Beginning" by Djo

Ahh anorher viral TikTok song gaining traction to wind up on the charts, this song came out in late 2022 and after having heard it, I wish I was as impressed with this song as other people seem to be, the instrumental sounds great, the drums have a nice rbythm but why are the vocals so god damn buried under the instrumentation? It makes the song feel like it is missing a hook so no...this doesn't work for me at all. Next!

"Stumblin' In" by CYRIL

Oh no...just no. Not another one of these type of songs. A producer taking an old song and turning it into unrecognisable junk but quickly just to explain CYRIL is an Australian DJ and producer that got his big breakthrough with this thing and somehow this version of Suzi Quatro and Chris Norman's 1980 hit that at the time had some romantic charm to it but this new version? Nope, there is nothing romantic about this, it just reminds me of the time Kenny G played saxophone over Louis Armstrong's "What a Wonderful World" except Cyril brings in these keysand strings then proceeds tio make Quatro and Norman sound washed out as hell. Skip this!.

"We Can't Be Friends (Wait For Your Love) by Ariana Grande

Okay with "Yes, And?" looking like a dud lead single with every passing day, this is the song from Ariana Grande's new album that appears to have some legs on the charts and is sticking around even if I I would have preferred "Supernatural" to be the song from "Eternal Sunshine" that absolutely smashes the charts as this is pretty middle of the road for Ariana as in its not precisely bad. its just forgettable given its another pop song in the vein of how she can't be friends with this guy given she wants a relationship... it feels a bit dime a dozen, that's all.

"Whatever She Wants" by Bryson Tiller

Kind of surprised that Bryson Tiller of all people turned up on the ARIA singles chart with any kind of momentum especially as I have never really thought of him as being all that interesting in his lane of hip hop but none the less, this song did turn up so what did we get? It's fine...I don't hate it, Bryson Tiller can ride this beat pretty well and he seems all ready to buy whatever this woman wants be it the brand names etc, I just wish it didn't feel like it was more empty flexing to say he can spend all this money so easily but check this out if you are curious

"Austin" by Dasha

So with the onslaught of country on the ARIA top 50 singles chatt these days, it's interesting that we have a relative no name make her debut on the charts although I will admit calling Dasha country is a stretch but just quickly Dasha is from California and her song "Austin" went viral on Tik Tok (makes me wonder what people will do for music discovery when TikTok is banned and that appears to only be a matter of time) so what do I make of this?

Well it's another of those songs that I think is absolutely fine even if I think it feels a bit too cookie cutter for it's own good but Dasha has the vocals to sell this song well even if I do get some of the criticisms. Check it out if you are curious.

"Fri(end)s" by V

So members of BTS are continuing to chart solo jaunts while the band is on a break with several members doing their time in military service in South Korea, V being the one that can pull off a smooth and somewhat funky sound that really actually works, I say all this because I feel like this song goes away from what makes V's sound really work, it sounds kind of rough in a way that doesn't flatter V at all. Bit disappointing if I am going to be honest.

Worst of the Month: "Stumblin In" by Cyril

Dishonourable Mention: "Fri(end)s" by V

Honourable Mention: "Whatever She Wants" by Bryson Tiller

Best of the Month: "Saturn" by SZA

ARIA Singles New Entry Review: January 2024

"LeaveMeAlone" by Fred Again....& Baby Keem

So we're starting the new chart year with some Fred Again, this time he is teaming up with US rapper Baby Keem and we'll...I am not sure....I like the instrumental here with the piano and that driving bass groove but what stops me from digging the song is the vocal production that makes Baby Keem sound like he is in a blender or something! It's not precisely bad and there is MUCH worse here.

"One of the Girls" by The Weeknd feat. JENNIE and Lily Rose Depp

Can we all just forget that The Idol existed? The show was terrible and frankly, the music from the soundtrack ain't that much better with this being a case in point, the sterile production as The Weeknd croons about breaking a girl's skin and how he lovesit when she's submissive before a hook where Lily Rose Depp sings that there's no need for love...she just wants to be one of The Weeknd's girls....yuck...this is just toxically icky in so many ways....gross... next song please!

"Yes, And?" by Ariana Grande

So after four years, Ariana Grande returns with the lead single from her upcoming new album Eternal Sunshine which features an interpolation of Madonna's 1990 classic "Vogue" and...Rrally, Ariana? If a snap back at the critics is the best you can do for lead single where she cannot convincingly sell any genuine anger or give the production any sense of bite or menace is the best you can do than I am worried for this upcoming album, it's just another gummy dance pop song that coming from Ariana is really disappointing and a waste of a potentially great interpolation.

"Redrum" by 21 Savage

I don't think this is a hot take but I think 21 Savage is better on his own than when he collaborates with Drake etc, give him some good Metro Boomin' production and he can go OFF when he doesn't have to share that space so with this song being from his latest album American Dream I was hoping that we might have a decent song here...and yeah, 21 Savage does sound menacing as all hell with that vocal delivery and that outro just slaps! Ovetall good song...unlike...

"Thinkin' About Me" by Morgan Wallen

Why, of all the fucking Morgan Wallen songs to chart in 2024, did it have to be the absolute worst song that Wallen has ever made? The lyrics are basically that Wallen can't let go of his EX girlfriend to the point where he is wondering whether or not she is thinking about him while she's with a guy that's not him...its just pathetic...made worse by production that sounds so lifeless and downtuned, its a slog of a song to sit through...ughh.

"Beautiful  Things" by Benson Boone

Ugghhh, we're really going to give this dude another hit...come onnn, seriously? This one might be worse given it gives me "Won't Give Up" by Jason Mraz vibes in the lyrics. Cute this ain't...next!

"Feather" by Sabrina Carpenter

Sabrina Carpenter is back and thankfully with a song that is a lot better than "Nonsense" but mostly because it sounds like an at home version of a sound Dua Lipa did better in 2020 on Future Nostalgia! It's not terrible by any stretch of the imagination but it's pretty forgettable.

"Never Lose Me" by Flo Milli

A chart break through, this time it's US R&B act Flo Milli and...I have to be honest here...this feels more like a fragment of a song and not a particularly  interesting or good one especially with that synth line that's not as interesting as Flo Milli's production team think it is.

"Saving Up" by Dom Dolla

Been awhile since we had an Australian hit and we've got it through Dom Dolla. I like this but holy shit, the vocals kind of annoy me,they sound kind of squawky and annoying but given everything else...I'll take it.

"Scared To Start" by Michael Marcagi

My goodness, are the new upcoming male singer/songwriters annoying or what? This song sounds like something Passenger wrote in 2013. I'll rant more about this song at the end of the year.

Worst: "Thinking About Me" by Morgan Wallen

Dishonourable Mention: "Scared To Start" by Michael Marcagi

Honourable Mention: "Saving Up" by Dom Dolla

Best: "Redrum" by 21 Savage

ARIA New Entries Review: January 2023

 Well, happy new year about a month or so late so just a quick update...I am going to continue doing the monthly ARIA new entry review series so yeah the weekly charts current and retro are on the back burner for a bit however year end list content is planned with the top ten best hit songs of 2022 hopefully by end of February plus my usual year end retro best and worst lists this time for 2004. I am also in early stages of seeing if a best list for 1999 is feasible.

However enough of that, time to talk about the songs that entered the ARIA singles chart in January beginning with...

"10:35" by Tiesto & Tate McRae

So this song has been on my replay list for awhile now and yeah,this is probably one of both artists better songs in years. Tate McRae sounds better on this than she has on anything...possibly ever and that hook is sticky as hell...check it out.

"Rumble" by Skrillex, Fred again... & Flowdan

Oh gosh, this is one of those songs where I get the appeal but it does not quite click for me. I actually like the production  from Skrillex and both Fred again and Flowdan sound good over this but yeah something in this ain't quite clicking but objectively this is pretty good.

"Flowers" by Miley Cyrus 

So I was looking forward to this, a new single from Miley Cyrus who'd shown pretty good promise as a rock artist in 2020 only to be pretty much ignored by the public bar "Midnight Sky" being a hit in Australia, only for my excitement to turn to disappointment because "Flowers" is mediocre self empowerment  post break up schlock via early 80s bad disco updated for 2023., it just feels calculating and like this is something Miley's record label wanted her to release because the nu disco sound in pop is in the in sound at the moment...sad thing is this netted a number one

Sigh...you can have your Flowers and hold your hand, Miley but you can do better.

"VIBE" by Taeyang and Jimin

So more k-pop via Taeyang who brought Jimin of BTS for the ride and yeah, this was a load of fun! The song kind of reminds me of the early 2000s boy band sound even if like bands in the early 2000s, the song is a little over produced but it's lightweight pop that's really more about coasting on the vibe...I had fun with this. Worth checking out.

"Sure Thing" by Miguel

Really? We could not have made "Coffee" a hit? Okay seems TikTok virality helped this song from the early 2010s chart and yeah, this is solid even if I don't like voice that comes over the top on the intro as it feels rather unnecessary but these of the song is really a pretty love song, I am fine with this being on the chart...unlike...

"Nonsense " by Sabrina Carpenter 

Le's be real, this song is only here because of chicanery by Sabrina Carpenter's label and Spotify whereby Spotify changed its auto play algorithm and thus gave this song an inflated boost by it appearing disproportionately in auto playlists... I mean really? Of any song they could have inflated the streams of, they could have done better than this gummy mush of song that resort's to spouting gibberish on the chorus. I don't see this sticking around, thankfully.

"Here With Me" by D4VD

Round two with D4VD and while this isn't as horrible as "Romantic Homicide", it still feels pretty forced and D4vD sounds pretty lethargic and the song as a whole feels like vague attempt to copy Steve Lacy's formula. It's not the worst of what is here though

"The Color Violet" by Tory Lanez

Really? I am supposed to care that the public suddenly sympathises with the now imprisoned Tory Lanez enough to give him a charting song on the ARIA  singles chart? Fuck that...I have better things to do than listen to this whiny prison bird complain he'll never dance again over a limp beat...bitch, please...

Worst of the month: "Nonsense" by Sabrina Carpenter

Dishonourable Mention: "The Color Violet" by Tory Lanez (Only just edges out Miley...

Honourable Mention: "Sure Thing" by Miguel

Best of the Month: "VIBE" by Taeyang feat. Jimin

ARIA Singles Top 50 new entries special: October

 "Romantic Homicide" by D4VD

Well, it appears we are starting October on a pretty shitty note with this slice of lame indie drudge from American rapper D4vd (pronounced David) that got Tik Tok virality to notch a slot on the chart and quite frankly this song blows not even just that D4vd sounds like Alex Turner from the Arctic Monkeys having a wrench progressively tightened on his buts as he croons his way through this self pity party of a song over a guitar that has all the flavour of liquid diarrhoea. Yuck!

"Evergreen (You Didn't Deserve Me At All)" by Omar Apollo

This is an interesting one, Omar Apollo is a bilingual (he sings in English and Spanish) American singer-songwriter with this song getting traction and I have to say this is pretty excellent, it's a slice of r&b soul that these days does not get the attention it so richly deserves. Apollo is trying desperately to move on from a broken relationship but is finding it difficult to move on because he still has real feelings for this person despite the shitty things they have done to him, it's a great song worth checking  out.

"Star Walkin'" by Lil Nas X

The newest Lil Nas X song comes from a collab with League of Legends and wow, I don't feel anything at all from this, it is not a bad song but it sounds oddly calculating and sterile which is weird coming from Lil Nas X of all people but he has done so much better than this. 

"Unholy" by Sam Smith and Kim Petras

See, this is why we should have made "Diamonds" a hit because then at least there would be no reason for Sam Smith and Kim Petras to get in a studio and make this cacophonous train wreck where lyrically Smith and Petras aren't on the same god damn page, Smith is trying to get naughty over what this guy does behind his wife's back while Petras is trying to get all steamy while name dropping expensive brand! What is worse is that this song sounds like a wall of noise... awful...

"Ferrari" by James Hype & Miggy Dela Rosa

English pair James Hype and Miggy Dela Rosa get together to create a weird song where they conflate sex and Ferraris over this weirdly flat groove which I guess kind of makes sense if he is comparing his sexual performance to a Ferrari...it's just a weird song that does nothing for me, that's all.

"How Do I Say Goodbye" by Dean Lewis

Okay so this is probably the best song on that new mediocre Dean Lewis album,  I have pretty much come to the conclusion that Lewis is the Australian version of Lewis Capaldi  only Lewis seems to have more of an idea of his vocal range. On this particular song, Lewis is questioning how he can possibly say goodbye to his dying father when his father has been a big part of Lewis's life...honestly there's better songs in this vein but this has its moments, it's fine.

"Celestial" by Ed Sheeran

Okay so Ed Sheeran made this song for that new Pokemon game and I actually really like this mostly because I think it has the potential to be a pretty damn great pop rock song...the foundations are there...if only they hadn't gone down the EDM breakdown route. Also Ed Sheeran singing this to a Squirtle sounds all sorts of cute.

"Edging" by Blink-182

Oh God...why? This is not the sort of comeback that anyone could have wanted from  Blink 182, this is bad in all of kinds of ways where the production doesn't make any of the wilful immaturity on display seem fun plus the lyrics are painfully juvenile so yeah avoid this garbage...next!

"Poland" by Lil Yachty 

This only got traction because of the forced  "I took a wock to Poland" meme otherwise there's nothing much else to this pointless fragment of a song.

"Bones" by Imagine Dragons

Oh geez, then again maybe I was being harsh on Blink 182 because yeah this song might be the most irritating thing this band have released since "Enemeeeeee". That God damn painful hook that sounds like children shrieking or mice after finding a shred of moldy cheese. Ugh. 

" Miss You" by Oliver Tree and Robin Schulz

Okay so producer Siouthstar took a Oliver Tree song called "Jerk" and used a  sample that was cleared by Tree's label for a song called "Miss You", fellow producer Robin Schulz picked up the song, made a few quick changes, did not get permission and released in what seems plagiarism however let's deal with the fact that this sounds like a nuclear propulsion, it's terribly mixed and Oliver Tree's voice sounds shrill...next!

"Snow on the Beach" by Taylor Swift  feat. Lana Del Rey

Now into the first of three songs from Taylor Swift's pretty damn great album "Midnights", this one featuring Lana Del Rey on backing vocals and yeah this one has been growing on me a lot, it just manages to sound absolutely gorgeous and while I at first thought Lana was was wasted just serving backing vocals, I can't deny it works, check it out.

"Lavender Haze" by Taylor Swift

The album opener that like "Snow on the Beach" has really grown on me with its warped melody and groove that reminds me a lot of trends in modern r'n'b plus lyrics where Taylor sings about avoiding tabloid speculation about her relationship with her boyfriend, Joe Alwyn. I will also note that the hook can get stuck in your head.

"Anti Hero" by Taylor Swift

 I have been wanting to talk about this song for ages because my God, this is Taylor's best lead single to date and one of my favourite songs of 2022 regardless of it being a hit or not, the lyrics of this song pack an incredible punch with Taylor realising that she's the problem in the eyes of some people and it must be exhausting for them to cheer for her the anti hero and to highlight that she repeatedly sings "it's me, hi, the problem is me:" until her voice goes ragged. The 80s style synths and the vocal harmonies just make this song stand out. This is Taylor Swift at her best

Worst of the month: "Miss You" by Robin Schulz and Oliver Tree

Dishonourable Mention: "Romantic Homicide " by D4VD and "Poland" by Lil Yachty

Honourable Mention: "Evergreen (You Didn't Deserve Me At All) by Omar Apollo and "Snow on the Beach" by Taylor Swift feat Lana Del Rey 

Best of the Month: "Anti-Hero" by Taylor Swift (duh)

ARIA Singles Top 50 New Entries Special: September

 "I'm Good (Blue)" by David Guetta and Bebe Rexha

Oh good lord, I guess it makes sense that these two would jump on a sample of Eiffel 65's 2000 hit "Blue (Da Ba Dee)" like everybody LAST YEAR was doing out of sheer desperation for a hit so this really is trend chasing except it shows that Guetta is out of ideas and this trend was played out last fucking year, Bebe Rexha sounds nasal and for somebody claiming she's good...she sounds miserable. One of the worst songs of the year!

"Hold Me Closer" by Elton John and Britney Spears

This is exactly why we should not have allowed "Cold Heart" to become a massive hit last year because it gaves Elton John a convenient to mash more of his back catalogue together into a greasy sounding homogeneous clusterfuck this time using "Don't Go Breaking Heart", "The One" and "Tiny Dancer" and like "Cold Heart", it saps both Elton and Britney of their personalities while destroying two absolute classics. Elton, please stop this!

"Something In the Orange" by Zach Bryan

Uhh... what the hell? Oklahoma singer songwriter and independent country artist Zach Bryan makes a surprise but very welcome debut on the ARIA singles chart with this song from his album this year "American Heartbreak" and yeah, I love this! It's a dark, broody song about the end of a relationship and my goodness, it makes use of negative space and and atmosphere to create the dark and haunting atmosphere, I cannot believe this charted but I am so happy it did.

"New Gold" by Gorillaz, Tame Impala and Bootie Brown

Oh so here's another surprise...only unfortunately this is nowhere as good as I was hoping with those annoying beeps that sound like some emergency is about to happen before more electronics hit Kevin Parker 's hook, it just doesn't sound good or come together that well...next!

"2 Be Loved (Am I ready)" by Lizzo

Well, it's fairly clear the 80s called because song sounds like something that would fit on a Jane Fonda workout tape, it's a song where Lizzo is asking herself if she's ready to be loved however this just doesn't work for me due to how oddly stiff and cheap the song sounds, there's just no nervous tension  to the production which you would think a song like this would need.

"Beautiful Crazy" by Luke Combs

I kind of suspected that in the wake of "The Kind of Love We Make" becoming a surprise hit this year that we were going to get older Luke Combs songs and well...the production is pretty with fiddle playing off a guitar but my problem is with the content about how this girl is beautiful but she's crazy yet there's nothing in the song that make me believe she's crazy...yeah she makes plans and changes her mind...that ain't crazy, Luke!

"When It Rains, It Pours" by Luke Combs 

Second Luke Combs song and well, okay, it's a genuine country song with a gentle guitar rollick and drum machines but again the problem here is the lyrics where this girl leaves him and now he is having all this good luck and is using his good fortune to be sour towards this girl and her mother and that kind of thing just puts me off the song.

"Forget Me" by Lewis Capaldi

The dreaded return of Lewis Capaldi and you know this not bad? Yeah the lyrics are still sour and again Capaldi sounds like he has no real idea of his vocal range or he has been violently kicked in the scrotum on the hook however I really like the melody courtesy of that piano so yeah, I don't mind this.

"Bound 2" by Kanye West

No...just no...

"Hotel" by Montell Fish

Okay, Christian artist Montell Fish had his break through on Tik Tok hence landing on the singles chart and...well, I don't hear the appeal at all, fuzzed out guitar because the song drops so we can hear Fish doing his best crooning The Weeknd impression which really did nothing for so let's just move on...

"Billie Eilish" by Armani White

Okay, this is blatant clickbait, using Billie Eilish's name just to get attention for your clunky trap song that's all about flexing and gun play, the only thing saving this is the fact that White has some charisma and energy compared to many in his genre but that won't make me come back to this.

"Shut Down" by Blackpink 

So this was the only song from that Blackpink album apart from "Pink Venom" to chart and this is not one of the better songs from that album with the squealing instrumentation that would cause dogs to run off bridges and the girls are trying so hard to be aggressive and 'shut down' those who do them wrong, it's kind of adorable but otherwise it sounds like a R ihanna 2015 reject.

Worst: "I'm Good (Blue)" by David Guetta and Bebe Rexha 

Dishonourable mention: "Hold Me Closer" by Elton John and Britney Spears

Honourable Mention: "Forget Me " by Lewis Capaldi 

Best of the Week: "Something In the Orange" by Zach Bryan