Top Ten Best Hit Songs of 1996

Let’s flip the script a bit and talk about the best songs of 1996, okay? Now, this year despite some of the awful I already talked about, was a really good year, a sign of that was I had to make some really painful cuts to get to this list of ten songs and I will warn ya all now that there will be picks you disagree with, this is just my personal opinion of the music in 1996.

As per usual, the songs had to be on the year end list for 1996 and these are just my picks, feel free to share your thoughts on 1996 in popular music and share your top ten songs of the year.

First up we get to the one Australian act on this list, in a year where boy bands started coming out of the woodwork to appear on the charts, an Aussie act got to me the most with this…

10. “Wishes” by Human Nature

This is not my favourite Human Nature song; they would have better results in 1998 but there’s still plenty to like here with this piano ballad where Human Nature realize they have done wrong by the ladies in their lives and are desperately hoping that she’ll forgive them, there’s a genuine raw contrition to this song that makes it work so damn well for me in the lyrics. I just love the harmonies and the music that fit the energy of the song for once unlike many songs from this 2019 which I will talk about once ARIA release the year end list.

Damn great song that deserved to be a top ten hit in 1996. Looking forward to an opportunity to talk about at least one other Human Nature song from 1998 down the track.




Here’s one of the more contentious picks, this was a UK girl group that exploded onto the pop music scene late this year courtesy of Simon Fuller. Five rather brash young women and this song was our introduction to them…

9. “Wannabe” by Spice Girls

I get it, the song doesn’t make any sense whatsoever but “Wannabe” is an incredibly catchy Eurodance pop rap song that doesn’t hide behind it’s no bullshit are you on board with us or not ideal and boy don’t the personalities shine through with Melanie Brown whose loud and somewhat wild/scary (even though I doubt Mel has a scary bone in her body) persona plays off well with Geri Halliwell’s also very wild and vivacious delivery which makes the call and response between the pair fun which explodes into Melanie Chisholm, Emma Bunton, Mel B and Geri sharing a line on the opening verse….anyway you get the picture.


This song is in your face, somewhat obnoxious but my god this song is a LOT of fun. The Spice Girls would go on to be the biggest name in pop music until the eventual split in 1999.


8. “Runaway” by The Corrs

Irish family act The Corrs emerged in 1996 and would carve a solid niche for themselves and this solid little debut single found its way into my heart, it’s a sweet song about being alone with that one other special person in your life and hoping he or she feels the same way and wanting to do everything that you can to be with this other person, it’s to a point rather dreamy especially with the music and production which builds into the chorus and again like Human Nature, the harmonies between the sisters are incredible and in a year full of Eurodance pop and the last vestiges of grunge, this song was a pretty unique sound.


Check this song out if you haven’t already.


However, if you are looking for something that vents its anger and frustration then this song maybe up your alley.


7. “Mother Mother” by Tracy Bonham


I’ve always felt this song would be on in the background of the image of the dog sitting at a table saying “Everything is just fine” as his house burns down around him except this song is full of pent up rage and frustration around being an adult in the world having just left home and Bonham is making a call home to let her mother know what is happening and then in the chorus Bonham let’s rip with the chorus ending with her screaming “EVERYTHING’S FINE!”


This song is a perfect frustration venter and I do like The Veronicas cover of this song as well but Tracy Bonham for a short moment in 1996 produced a hit that connected for me and deserves to be on this list.


So this is the first of two country songs on this list and when you consider that in 2019, you’d struggle to find a country song being a hit unless it’s apart of a meme or considered to be country rap but in 1996, this woman was starting out her career and boy, she dropped a beauty…


6. “(If You’re Not In It for Love) I’m Outta Here” by Shania Twain


This song snuck up on me, I didn’t really love it at first and that remix didn’t help things however Shania Twain’s vocals are what makes this song really work and that incredible guitar chuck in that harmonica and this song is a bunch of fun as Shania is busy telling this guy that she isn’t interested in what he has got unless he loves her and if he doesn’t to get the hell out, Shania isn’t going to be used by ANY man, she’s got the attitude to show it.

I just love how insanely fun the song is and the groove is fantastic. Great song. Am so happy this was a hit.


While we’re on love, we’re hitting up some heartbreak for this next song.



5. Give Me One Reason by Tracy Chapman


Tracy Chapman was one of the more unique songwriters in the 90s and this song is just perfect with its chilled guitar driven melody as Chapman begs her partner to give her one good reason that she should stay in the relationship with the last line being the real kicker with the reply appearing to come from the partner “Said I told you that I love you and there ain’t no more to say” but the question of whether Chapman stays or not is never directly answered.

I love Chapman’s soulful delivery and the storytelling on display in this song plus that guitar in the middle 8 of the song is awesome!


My worst hit songs of 1996 came down hard on really bad cover songs but there was one cover that knocked it out of the park in 1996, this song is a classic and there was no god damn way I could leave it off this list.


4. “Killing Me Softly (With His Song)” by Fugees

The Fugees take the originally recorded by Lori Lieberman in 1971 and Roberta Flack’s 1973 classic “Killing Me Softly (With His Song)” and made it their own courtesy of Lauryn Hill’s moving lead vocals and a sample of A Tribe Called Quest’s 90s song called “Bonita Applebum” and even then they’d sampled “Memory Band” by 60s group Rotary Connection.

However, while the music works so well, it’s Lauryn Hill that just elevates this song into something special and makes it all the more powerful and reminds of the power of live performance because Lieberman’s original came out after she saw Don McLean perform a song called “Empty Chairs” at the Troubador Club and wrote a poem about it which spawned this song.

This deserved its long run at number one, it’s a classic for good reason.

Now we hit the second of the two country songs on this list and the placing of this one is contentious given I asked Twitter which one was better, and they placed Shania Twain above it but for me, this song hits just that little bit harder and is also a cover…


3. “Blue” by LeAnn Rimes


Leann Rimes was one of the most exciting young talents in country music in 1996 before she’d go on to making tepid pop music later but “Blue” is a shining example of what Rimes was capable of. She was 11 years old when she first recorded “Blue” a song originally released by song writer-country artist and country radio DJ Bill Mack.

“Blue” takes a lonely man’s feelings of heartache and loss, he wonders why his lover doesn’t seem feel sad or lonely over him like he does only to find that his lover had been whispering lies in his ear, it’s a total punch to the stomach and one that Leann Rimes captures so remarkably well at the age of just 13 at the time (really for a 13 year old, she had a quite the incredible voice) and pair her voice with that guitar, it just makes for that perfect country song, it’s actually one of my favourite country songs ever quite honestly.


So yeah the next two songs are songs that getr me emotionally, this first one especially hits close to home.


2. “Nobody Knows by Tony Rich Project

Yeah I am not sure how much I can talk about this song especially as when I hear it, I tear up, “Nobody Knows” is a ballad about lost love and Tony Rich knowing deep down inside that he is missing this girl but can’t bring himself to talk about it with other people in the most immediate days after she’s gone, he is realizing all the things he never got to say to her before she left, the song is just raw and heartbreaking.

I won’t go into why it cuts so deep for me but yeah this held some emotional weight for me and you know what, I feel Tony’s pathos too. Great song and for a while would have topped this list but…

So when I set out to make this list, I was certain that “Nobody Knows” was going to top it until I heard this song and realized it was the right pick for number one for a lot of reasons and that song is…

1. “Change the World’ by Eric Clapton

Yeah, I couldn’t let this song not top and this isn’t the best Eric Clapton song, “Tears in Heaven” would probably top my 1992 best hit songs list if I was doing that but this is so damn good. Originally recorded by country artist Wynonna Judd in the early part of 1996 which is slightly more groove driven than Clapton’s but man, I couldn’t ignore the passionate delivery by Clapton on his version of the song, it genuinely sounds lovestruck in both the instrumentation and the lyrics where Clapton is communicating his feelings to this girl but is scared that the feelings won’t be reciprocated and therefore his love will go unrequited if things in his life don’t change.

It’s yet again another raw honest gut punch of a song that yeah I had to put on top of this list.


So that wraps up 1996, if you want to share your top ten favourite hit songs from 1996, feel free to comment.

To here these songs, I have put together a playlist of all ten to check out





Coming up just an ARIA singles top ten this week, no chart review as most of the chart is just Christmas music, Will have 2019 year end worst and best hits lists whenever ARIA decide to put out the year end chart. This week we turn to the first year of the new millennium...2000 and see what chaos reigned on the charts during that year. See ya soon/

ARIA Singles Chart top ten/ Chart Review: 23rd December. Harry's Mini Fine Line album bomb

So my intention is to breeze through this pretty quickly because honestly I do want to get back to work on my Best hit songs of 1996 list as this week really wasn't that interesting but I guess it's good enough before all the Christmas songs inevitably swamp the chart next week.
For a 21st week, it's "Dance Monkey" by Tones and I at number one, it's a bit of a dicey battle as to whether it will get a 22nd week at number one especially as Mariah's streaming numbers are strong.

"Don't Start Now" by Dua Lipa holds on to number two. I really would like to see this song be the next number one song but its been swallowed up by Christmas music on streaming while sales are doing well, I doubt this is going to go number one.

The rest of the top six is pretty much the same with "Roxanne" by Arizona Zervas at number three, "Memories" by Maron 5 at number four (can we fuck this garbage off the charts NOW please), "Circles" by Post Malone at number 5 and "Ride It" by Regard at number six.

Riding the wave off the release of his album "Fine Line", Harry Styles single "Adore You" climbed 7 places to number seven, it pushed "Never Seen the Rain" by Tones and I back to number eight. I don't expect "Adore You" to stick around in the top ten tbh.

Breaking into the top ten is "Blinding Lights" by The Weeknd rising five places to number nine. Excellent news because the song is fucking fantastic

Finally, "All I Want for Christmas Is You" by Mariah Carey has finally hit the top ten rising one place to number ten.

Gains

We have a lot of Harry Styles to talk about and he is the leading big gainer this week with "Watermelon Sugar" jumping twenty places to number 12.

"Before You Go" by Lewis Capaldi rose nine places to break into the top 20 at number seventeen because of course we need more dull sappiness on the chart.

Then we have Wham's "Last Christmas" up seven to twenty three and "It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas" by Michael Buble rose six places to number thirty two.

Re-Entries

Just the one re-entry with Harry Styles "Lights Up" back at 34

Losers
Taylor Swift's "Lover" hit 50 (this song should still make year end list I hope) while "Old Town Road" by Lil Nas X down to 27 from 18. Those were the only really significant losses this week.

Dropouts

Some significant ones here although they were all returns a few weeks ago with "Shallow" by Lady Gaga and Bradley Cooper, "Wow" by Post Malone, "How Do you Sleep?" by Sam Smith and "Rans$om" by Lil Tecca gone. All will comfortably make year end chart.

They also took with them "Robbery" by Juice WRLD and "Up All Night" by Khalid,

New Entries

I wish Tik Tok would go the hell away because the highest debuting single belongs to Trevor Daniel's "Falling" at number 14...it's not a good song.

Harry Styles saw two album tracks hit the chart with "Falling" debuting at 35 and "Golden" at number 46

Forgettable at best, terrible at worst is the debut at number 36 which is "My Oh My" by Camila Cabello feat. Dababy..

A massive hit in the UK right now is "Owned it" by Stormzy feat. Ed Sheeran and Burna Boy, it's debuted on the ARIA singles chart at number 40.

Not sure I am going to cover next week's chart as it is likely to be swamped with Christmas music...joy....may just do the top ten and move on. Best hit songs of 1996 is coming soon. Don't forget the ARIA Chart updates at 5pm AEDT on Saturday.

Charting 1996: 22nd December: What is Macarena Christmas doing in the TOP TEN?

So here we are the final chart week of the year before the chart goes into a recess over the Christmas/New Year period ahead of 1997 and for yet another week "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls remains at number one, now this song looks to be losing ground but it's not under any threat from pur returning number two "Where Do You Go?" by No Mercy which is slowly also starting to lose steam especially as it is a close race for number two but it held off "What's Love Got to Do With It" by Warren G feat. Adina Howard which slipped back to number three.

Savage Garden remained steady at number four with "To the Moon and Back", this song is still on track to be a number one hit next year, you watch.

Then we have a surprise at number five, because the "Macarena" won't go the hell away, we have "Macarena Christmas" by Los Del Rio up from thirty seven. Did anyone really want or NEED this in the top ten. Geez.

At number six is Shania Twain's "(If You're Not In it for Love) I'm Outta Here" which is up three places this week. Good. I really like this song and am glad to see it doing well, it helped to push "Breathe" by The Prodigy back two places to number seven (I am surprised it's still in the top ten)

It also had the same effect on "Wishes" by Human Nature which dropped one place to number eight. Again another good song, just a shame it lost ground this week.

Toni Braxton climbs one place to number nine with "Un-Break My Heart", this song looks to be on track to achieving similar success to "You're Makin' Me High";

Finally the big loser is "Don't Stop Movin'' by Livin' Joy which dropped four places to number ten. Good.

Gains
The gains this week outside of "Macarena Christmas" in the top five are mostly new songs set to be hits in 1997 with Whigfield's "Sexy Eyes" up 12 to 38,  "Lemon Tree" by Fool's Garden up to 35 from 47 and Unique II's "Break My Stride" up to 26 from 45 and looks to be the big mover of the week.

The only other big gainer is a case of continued momentum and that came for "Twisted" by Keith Sweat which broke into the top 20 at number 19 this week.

Re-Entries
Two re-entries this week and honestly I am not sure why with the best of them being "You Spin Me Around (Like a Record) ('96 Remix)" by Dead or Alive back at 46 and "Down" by 311 back at 48.

Losers

Former top ten hit "I'll be There For You" by The Remembrandts dropped from 35 to 44 while Tori Amos hit 42 from 34 with "Hey Jupiter/Professional Widow".

However, they weren't the biggest losers this week with "Mama Said" by Metallica dropping hard from 24 to 39. Ouch.

The Symbol (Prince) dropped from 18 to 30 this week with "Betcha by Golly Wow!" while "I Love You Always Forever" by Donna Lewis fell eight places to 20.

New Entry

It's a fairly muted week on the new entry side of things with just one new song entering the top 50 with No Doubt's new single "Don't Speak" in at number 50 and considering how big "Just A Girl" was in 1996, I wouldn't be surprised if this song is huge in 1997

That wraps up the final edition of Charting 1996, don't forget you can check out my top ten worst hit songs of 1996 here. My top ten best hit songs are coming soon as is this week's ARIA Chart top ten/review which should be on here sometime today.

As far as retro chart reviews go? I believe I am going to be covering the year of the Sydney Olympics and the turn of the millennium next year so that is going to be fun!.

ARIA Singles Chart top ten/ Chart Review: 16th December. 2019 hits rise again.

This week is a weird one and it’s mostly weird when we get to our gains and what re-entered the chart this week, we also saw some shifts within the top ten including one shift in the top ten that caught me by surprise.

What wasn’t a surprise is a twentieth week at number one for “Dance Monkey” by Tones and I, I don’t see this song going anywhere as its somehow still ruling sales and streaming.

What was a welcome surprise was Dua Lipa’s “Don’t Start Now” moving to number 2 and becoming Dua’s highest charting hit in Australia as it is pretty consistent on both sales and streaming, sales is what moved it past “Roxanne” by Arizona Zervas at number three which  hasn’t quite had the sales to match it’s consistent streaming.

“Memories” by Maroon 5 regained ground to number four pushing “Circles” by Post Malone back to number five.

“Ride It” by Regard stays steady at number six while “Never Seen the Rain” by Tones and I moved up one place to number seven and “Good as Hell” by Lizzo up to number eight.

“Everything I Wanted” by Billie Eilish drops two places to number nine. Sadly, back for what I hope is a final week in the top ten is “Someone You Loved” by Lewis Capaldi which rose seven places.

Gains

The gains were mostly for 2019 hits that got boosts on the back of people listening to their year end Spotify playlists etc so songs like “Sunflower” by Post Malone and Swae Lee which went from 36 to 21 and “Old Town Road” by Lil Nas X which jumped from 29 to 18, “Senorita” by Shawn Mendes and Camila Cabello to 17.

Long running 2018 hit “Eastside” by Benny Blanco feat. Halsey and Khalid jumped from 45 to 34.

Also gaining big was Christmas music with “All I Want For Christmas is You” by Mariah Carey up to 11 and “Last Christmas” by Wham to 30

Re Entries

We have a whole slew of re-entries this week. Juice WRLD’s untimely death saw “Lucid Dreams”  back at 16, “Bandit” feat. Youngboy Never Broke Again at 45, and “Robbery” at 49.

Also back this week were “Ran$om” by Lil Tecca at 42, “Shallow” by Lady Gaga and Bradley Cooper at 43 and “Wow” by Post Malone at 47.

Losers

Some big losers this week with the biggest being “Lover” by Taylor Swift which fell hard to 39 from 23 unfortunately…it should make the year end list…just.

“Highest in the Room” by Travis Scott slipped to 33 from 21, “Up All Night” by Khalid dropped from 37 to 50. Sadly, “Castles” by Freya Ridings fell from 26 to 35.'

“Trampoline” by Shaed fell ten places to 44 while former US number ones also had big tumbles with “Heartless” by The Weeknd stumbling from 10 to 24, “Lose You to Love me” by Selena Gomez hit 25 proving how forgettable that song is.

Finally, ‘Rushing Back” by Flume feat. Vera Blue hit 29 down from 18.

Dropouts

“Lights Up” by Harry Styles exited this week but should be back on the chart next week after the release of Harry’s second album “Fine Line”. Also gone are “Teeth” by 5 Seconds of Summer, “Yellow Hearts” by Ant Saunders, “Catching Feelings” by Drax Project feat. Six60, “Only Human” by Jonas Brothers (Good fucking riddance), “Follow God” by Kanye West and “Used to Love” by Martin Garrix feat. Dean Lewis

New Entries

Just the one new entry this week with “Adore You” by Harry Styles in at number 14, I can see this song reaching the top ten following the album release next week.

The questions are will Mariah Carey can crack the top ten and will we get an album bomb from Harry Styles? Those questions and more will be answered when ARIA updates their charts at 5pm AEDT on Saturday.

Charting 1996: 15 December.

It’s the penultimate week of the charting year and it looks like we’re going to end it on a turbulent note at least within our top ten apart from the number one which yet again is “Wannabe” by the Spice Girls, it still rules on sales.

It also helps that there’s a complete bunfight going on for number two with “What’s Love Got to Do With It” by Warren G feat. Adina Howard retaking the second spot ahead of “Where Do You Go” by No Mercy at number three.

Now what could overtake the pair of them is “To the Moon and Back” by Savage Garden which climbed two places to number four, this song has momentum on its side, I expect this could be number two soon.

It pushed “Breathe” by The Prodigy back to number five, I’d be surprised if this song really hangs around in the top ten.

Climbing three places to number six is “Don’t Stop Movin’” by Livin’ Joy, I really am not sure what the appeal of this song is but hey it got a boost on the back of some strong sales.

Human Nature rise one place to number seven with “Wishes”, a ballad that has gotten the attention of some people which is  good thing because I like the song and also because it helped push “Sometimes When We Touch” by Newton down three places to number eight.

American country star Shania Twain has her first top ten hit as “(If You’re Not In it for Love) I’m Outta Here” rises from 13 to 9 while Toni Braxton has yet another top ten hit with “Un-Break My Heart” rising 7 places to ten.

Gains

Fugees cover of Bob Marley’s “No Woman, No Cry” is up 18 places to 20 while Metallica’s “Mama Said” rose 12 places to 24.

Also continuing to show the fact that it’s going to be BIG in 1997 is Blackstreet with “No Diggity’ feat. Dre up to 39.

Losers

Couple of big losers this week with “Many Rivers to Cross” by Toni Childs hitting 44 from 25. “Mach S” by The Presidents of the United States down to 41 from 35.

“Crazy” by Mark Morrison fell hard to 46 from 37 while “Child” by Mark Owen fell from 24 to 33.

Former chart topper and likely year end number one “Macarena” by Los Del Rio dropped to 32 from 15.

New Entries

The Symbol otherwise known as Prince has landed the highest new entry of the week at number 18 with a cover of The Stylistics “Betcha By Golly Wow”.

Bush’s latest entry on the ARIA singles chart is at number 36 called “Swallowed”. Believe it or not Los Del Rio can’t let us forget “Macarena” because “Macarena Christmas” enters at 37.

We have another cover new this week, it comes from Austrian Eurodance artist Unique II who has arrived on the ARIA singles chart with a cover of Matthew Wilders 80s hit “Break My Stride” at number 45

German band Fool’s Garden are in at number 47 with “Lemon Tree” and finally Danish singer Whigfield is new at 50 with “Sexy Eyes”

The Top Ten Worst Hit Songs of 1996

So you may have noticed that this year I have been doing a series on my blog called “Charting 1996” which has been a journey through the year 1996 and the ARIA charts of the time. Why 1996? Well 1996 is around the time that I became interested in top 40/pop music as I would watch Rage on ABC back in the days when they did their top 50 countdown and listen to Take 40 Australia with Barry Bissell on the radio.

However It’s time to look back on the year that was 1996 and delve into the songs that SUCKED and I’ll be honest here, the pickings for bad songs were very slim as the music mostly ranged from excellent to being dull (Dull isn’t something to put a song on the worst list for because if dull was a factor, there’d be several songs that’d be contenders.

1996 was a strange year for the charts where the constant turnover meant a song would stay in the top ten for a couple of weeks and then leave. We also had songs that spent weeks on top of the charts…one of those being on this list, we also got a tonne of covers hitting the charts.

So to make this list, the songs had to make ARIA’s year end list for 1996 and keep in mind that this is just my opinion, my views should not stop you from enjoying these songs if you like them…somehow.

Let’s start with a cover that takes the magic of the original and turns it into mush…

10. “Father and Son” by Boyzone

1996 saw several new boybands hit the Australian charts including Backstreet Boys, No Mercy and Human Nature but the new boy group that claimed the spotlight in early 1996 was Boyzone, a group from out of the UK who were very successful over there and had moderate success in Australia beyond 1996 but this cover of Cat Stevens iconic song “Father and Son” is just passionless droning that sucks the passion, comfort and charm that the original version had. It sounds like Boyzone just sang this out of sheer desperation for something to release because it feels so empty and lacking the comforting warmth of the original.

Oh, and they replaced the guitar with piano and strings to make the song sound not just passionless in the vocals but fucking manufactured which is something I am sure Sufjan Stevens was not intending for the song. Ugh, time to move on.

Boyzone weren’t the only British boy band to try and fail at making a cover, here’s proof.

9. “How Deep Is Your Love” by Take That

Take That were another British boyband that rose to prominence in the UK in 1995 and sadly their success continued with this cover of the Bee Gees 70s hit “How Deep is Your Love” in 1996 and oh dear god, it says something that Glee did this song better in the 2010s and I don’t even LIKE Glee all that much, this cover sounds like four drunk guys on a cheap version of the Love Boat all doing really bad karaoke, it is incredible how off key and monotonous they all sound.

Also why do the backing vocals sound louder on the second verse than the actual lead vocals and why does it all sound like I am on some sleepy bad beach holiday for those forever meant to be single?

The original had an energy, warmth and groove that this flat badly produced garbage doesn’t have, its no fucking wonder Robbie Williams left Take That because shit like this gave him very good damn reason to walk his own way.

Taking a break away from bad cover versions to talk about a song that if it hadn’t been released in 1996, I’d have thought Taylor Swift had wrote it.

8. “Who Do U Love” by Deborah Cox

Deborah Cox is a Canadian singer songwriter and actress who somehow combined a sample of Soul II Soul’s music with Cox really trying hard and mostly failing to be the next Whitney Houston all the while having lyrics that are so god damn toxic that they remind me of some of the more horrible Taylor Swift relationship songs (think “I knew You were trouble” and “You Belong With Me”) because “Who Do you Love” is just ugly.

This man has just walked out on Cox and now she’s wondering who he could possibly want or love more than her because it’s a ‘mystery’ why he left her for another woman because after all there’s no other women out there that is good enough for him and how dare he want and love another woman enough to walk out on her. The lyrics here really do paint Deborah Cox in a rather unflattering light, she comes across as narcissistic and obsessive in a way that is creepy.

This song is just a creepy, badly written clusterfuck however if you want to find absolute awful that was ahead of it’s time then we have…

7. “Hey Lover” by LL Cool J feat. Boyz II Men

So LL Cool J and Boyz II Men are acts I actually respect within the realm of 90s hip hop and R’n”B, Boyz II Men made pleasant r’n’b jams that were chill enough to relax too while LL Cool J did bust out some pretty incredible hip hop in the mid-90s which is why it’s such a shame that their collaboration resulted in this garbage.

This song is one of those “Imma steal your girl” songs which makes it ahead of its time considering the proliferation of these sort of songs in the 2010s. Now Boyz II Men frame the song as the man this girl is with is neglects her but honestly the rest is so god damn creepy and the fact LL Cool J says its his mission to take this girl off this other dude is not cool, if she isn’t happy, she’ll break up with him.

The chorus that pretty much just moans “Hey Lover” is freaking gross especially as she isn’t LL Cool J or Boyz II Men’s lover just yet.

Then again when it comes to creepy love songs, there is Bryan Adams…

6. “The Only Thing that Looks Good on Me Is You” by Bryan Adams

At this point, Bryan Adams was at the height of his powers, he’d had a number of huge hits in the early part of the nineties (cue “Everything I do (I do it for you)”) and honestly this song isn’t his worst…we’ll get to that…but the reason this song is here is because of the lazy song writing on display where Adams complains he doesn’t look good in designer wear or anything else except for his partner which is all kinds of questionable by the way. All men scrub up well in a suit as a rule, Bryan!

The production is this flimsy sounding guitar which tries for a rock sound and Adams sounding like he is out of breath the entire time or he horny which would make sense because the song sounds like he wrote it with his penis.

So yeah stepping away from the bad and somewhat creepy love songs, we need to deal with what can be simply described as noise.

5. “Boom Boom Boom” by The Outhere Brothers

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I was going to give this slot to “One of Us” by Joan Osborne, a song that has gotten worse with time however “Boom Boom Boom” by The Outhere Brothers is excruciating to listen to in between that synth noise that sounds like a bed squeaking and the thumping distorted noise that passes for melody…geezus christ, just stop already.

Then there are the lyrics which alternate from being painfully repetitive even for an alleged dance song to being about orgasms and having sex of which none of it sounds even vaguely romantic but just rather childish eg “Slip my peter into your folder” and even in one line a vague reference to stealing this girl. Gross.

Thank goodness these brothers disappeared back to where they belonged.

I did say Bryan Adams would another appearance on this list…

4. “Let’s Make a Night to Remember” by Bryan Adams

You know Bryan, you didn’t have try to knock off Bruce Springsteen so hard with this song, it’s genuinely weird how much the songs wants to be akin to Springsteen but fails. There’s something that is just inherently sleazy that makes my skin crawl and honestly makes “The Only thing that Looks Good on Me Is You” even worse.

The whole song feels less like Bryan Adams and more like homage to Bruce Springsteen except I am sure Bruce would have rejected the less than romantic and really rather sluggish and drowsy production around a song about having sex and the references to sweat dripping off this girl. Adams also sings the song with all the enthusiasm of discovering that his favourite shirt has been eaten through by fucking fire ants.

At least, Adams didn’t desecrate one of the greatest soul songs ever like this next group did…

3. “Sexual Healing” by Max-A-Million

It should be a crime do soul legend Marvin Gaye a dirty like this, it really fucking should be, the only positive coming from this crappy garbage is that a small town in America was powered by Marvin Gaye spinning in his grave. Max-a-Million tone back the sexual tension that was in the original to turn the song into something Shaggy would have rejected in 1995! The production isn’t anywhere near close to as sexy as it seems to think it is.

Also the rap verses are pretty terrible and lazy, here’s an example: “And I know me love you know I ain't been creepy creeping. When you spread out yuh legs ah me no get yuh lazy. A rubba dubba I'm ya lover I know you feel me baby”

THAT IS NOT ANYWHERE NEAR CLOSE TO SEXY!. If you want real sexual healing in music seek out Marvin Gaye’s original…it’s far better than this crap will ever be.

Although if you are looking for something sexy, don’t ask this next guy…

2. “Sometimes When We Touch” by Newton

So I have made no bones about the fact that I hate the original version of this song that was released in 1976 by Dan Hill mainly because the lyrics switch between being overwhelmingly sappy to Hill being an absolute piece of shit as he refuses to let this girl move on. Dan Hill himself even admitted back in 2010 to a Canadian website that the song is stupid.

So in 1996 along comes Newton, a dance artist, from the UK who decided to put his spin on the song and yeah makes the song worse. Yeah it’s got the pianos at the beginning but then from about the chorus on it goes into full dance mode which doesn’t match the soppy nature of the lyrics at all and also Newton is not an impressive singer at all and that note at the end sounds like he just got scalded by hot water or had a scare.

Either way kill this cover and the original with fire.

So we have reached the top of the list and for awhile I wasn’t sure what my top pick was going to be, in the end I went with the song that has stuck around and become a lingering shit stain on pop culture, we expose our children to this SHIT and the number one goes to…

1   “Macarena (Bayside Boys Remi x)” by Los Del Rios

Bad dance songs in the 2010s have been commonplace but they never really stick around however in 1996, this song stuck around at the top of the charts for nine whole weeks and yet the issues with this song stretch for miles from the strange gurgling bleating goat noises that once you hear you will not get out of your head  to the horrible giggling teenage girl style lyric delivery in the verse by one of the woman who claims her name is Macarena obnoxiously laughs off the fact she has admitted to cheating on her boyfriend.  

At least the chorus is fun and is literally the only thing worth caring about. FUCK this trash. “Macarena (Bayside Boys Remix)” The worst hit song of 1996, see ya all later.

ARIA top ten singles/ Chart Review: 9th December. Christmas music returns

So it was coming for awhile now but this week saw the arrival of Christmas music on the chart, whether or not we wanted it to or not, we also got the expected chart entries for The Weeknd but we’ll get to all of that in a second but first our top ten where for a NINETEENTH week “Dance Monkey” by Tones and I continues its remarkable run at the top and again I am not seeing what is going to topple it just yet especially as it still as streaming and sales on lock.

“Roxanne” by Arizona Zervas spends another week at number two, it’s got good streaming and there’s signs that the sales might be catching up but is it all too little too late.

The week’s biggest gainer came from Dua Lipa with “Don’t Start Now” up four places to number three off the back of streaming and sales.

Post Malone regained some lost ground as “Circles” moved back up to number four off some solid streaming numbers, it thankfully moved past “Memories” by Maroon 5 which went down to number five this week (frankly, the sooner that song is gone the better)

“Ride It” by Regard slipped three places to number six as its streaming isn’t holding it up and sales can’t cover while “Everything I Wanted” by Billie Eilish slipped back one place to number seven, there’s signs of life for this song yet as streaming looks to be recovering.

Tones and I’s second song inside the top ten “Never Seen the Rain” jumped one place up to number eight thanks to a solid sales week, it pushed past “Good as Hell” by Lizzo at number nine.

Finally, The Weeknd’s big return is at number ten with “Heartless”, we’ve still got some more The Weeknd to talk about in the new entries.

Gains.

Not much to talk about here. “Lose Control” by Meduza feat. Becky Hill and Goodboys up two places to 15.

Re-Entries

The returns are both Christmas songs with Mariah Carey’s “All I want for Christmas is You” in at number 20 and Wham’s “Last Christmas” back at 38.

Losers

“Follow God” by Kanye West continued its plunge down nine places to 49. Lizzo’s “Truth Hurts” slid painfully from 39 to 46.

It wasn’t a good week for Harry Styles as “Lights Up” went from 33 to 41 and “Watermelon Sugar” got too sweet for some as it dropped eight to 28.

Drop Outs

Couple of songs likely to have snagged a spot on the year end list went this week with “It’s You” by Ali Gatie and “Higher Love” by Kygo and Whitney Houston.

Songs that might just make year end, but it will be tight are “Slide Away” by Miley Cyrus and “Liar” by Camila Cabello (that song might return with her album released last week)

Also gone is “Mean It” by Lauv feat. LANY.

New Entries

I did mention we have more The Weeknd to talk about, well, at 16 is the second song he dropped called “Blinding Lights”, a song I consider to be awesome and should be a massive hit.

Finally, the Christmas impact is also felt in the new arrivals with Michael Buble’s “It’s Beginning to Look A Lot Like Christmas” in at 42.

Next week, the likely return of several Juice WRLD songs following the rapper’s death in Chicago during the past week and the continued infiltration of Christmas music on the charts. ARIA will update the chart at 5pm AEDT on Saturday.

Charting 1996: 8th December.Busy week as The Prodigy Breathe into top 5

Boom. We have a really busy week here as 1996 continues to wind down, we're not far from the chart year finishing, there are plenty of changes to the top ten including a new entry in the top 5 and a slew of new entries further down the charts however what wasn't affected by any change was the number one which for yet another week is "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls and look, there's just nothing getting near it right now.

It's closest competition is "Where Do You Go?" by No Mercy which climbed one place to number two but its close for that number two spot as "What's Love Got to Do With it" by Warren G feat. Adina Howard dropped one place to number three.

There's a new entry at number four coming from The Prodigy with "Breathe". A good sales week ensured a strong debut for this song.

"Sometimes When We Touch" by Newton remains at number five (unfortunately) while one of the big climbers this week is Savage Garden's "To the Moon and Back" which jumped ten places to number six, it could be a contender for number one soon.

What won't be contending for number one is "I Love You Always Forever" by Donna Lewis as it slipped down three places to number seven.

The second song to reach the top ten this week comes from Human Nature as "Wishes" rises from 11 to 8, it's the band's first top ten hit.

Slipping down two places is "Don't Stop Movin'" by Livin' Joy at number 9 while “It’s All Coming Back to Me Now” by Celine Dion wraps up the top ten by remaining at number ten.

Gains

Shania Twain looks set for a stint in the top ten as her single “(If You’re not in it for Love) I’m Outta Here” rocketed up 11 places to number 13.

Dead Or Alive move up ten places with “You Spin Me Round (Like A Record) (’96 Remix” at number 28.

Interestingly Puff Johnson’s “Over and Over” rose hard to 29…this kind of rhythm and blues is very radio friendly so keen to see if this continues to have traction going forward.

Tori Amos continues her rise with “Hey Jupiter/Professional Widow” rising to 34 from 43.

Keith Sweat’s “Twisted” rose seven places to 30

Re-Entries

“Macarena” by Los Del Mar feat. Pedro Castano is back at 47 for some strange reason.

Losers

A lot of former hits lost ground hard this week with “Lover Lover” by Jimmy Barnes dropping from 25 to 42 and “I Want You” by Savage Garden falling from 30 to 41.

“I’ll be There for You” by The Remembrandts took a plunge from 20 to 33 as this song dies off naturally while Mark Morrison’s follow up “Crazy” isn’t charting the same course as “Return of the Mack” as it plunged from 22 to 37 this week.

“Macarena” by Los Del Rio fell out of the top ten to 15 (Good).

New Entries

So we have a slew of new entries aside from The Prodigy’s “Breathe” which as mentioned earlier debuted at number four.

We must go all the way down to 36 to find the next new entry though which is “Mama Said” by hard rock stars Metallica. British pop outfit Deuce are in at 44 with “On the Bible”

American rock rap band 311 have entered the chart at 45 with “Down”. Honestly it’s pretty awful so I don’t expect it to stick around.

Gina G is finally following up “Ooh Ahh…(Just A Little Bit)” with another high energy dance song reminiscent of Kylie Minogue called “I Belong to You’ which entered the ARIA chart at number 48.

Finally a song that I think might do well well into 1997 is “No Diggity” by Blackstreet featuring Dr. Dre which entered at 50. It has potential to be huge.

ARIA singles top ten/Chart Review: 2nd December. Watermelon Sugar gets a big sugar rush

So this week was strange just a few changes within the top ten and a couple of new entries lower down the chart, it was a rather slow week overall.

No change at the top for the eighteenth week where unbelievably "Dance Monkey" by Tones and I remains dominate. Sure its lost a little bit of streaming but the song is ruling sales and right now I don't see what's taking number one.

"Roxanne" by Arizona Zervas continues to be a streaming darling and would a number one contender if its sales weren't so sluggish.

I would say "Ride It" by Regard is a chance but it spent the week bleeding on streaming and sales aren't really matching it anymore.

"Memories" by Maroon 5 continues it's bland and really pointless presence at number four. I am always surprised that ARIA remembered to include this song on the chart but no it's steady across the board so it's not going anywhere. Yikes.

"Circles" by Post Malone got a one place rebound to number 5 but like with "Ride It", it's bleeding on streaming too.

Then there's the expected four place drop for "Everything I wanted" by Billie Eilish. Not surprising as she keeps strangely promoting songs from her first album with "Xanny" set to get a video. Streaming for "Everything I wanted" has taken a dive, I expect to see this gone from the top ten next week.

What could make a play for number one in the weeks ahead is "Don't Start Now" by Dua Lipa which rebounded one place to number 7. This song is doing well on streaming and on sales, expect to see this in the top 5 next week, hell, it pushed Lizzo's "Good as Hell" back one place to number 8 which might have happened anyway.

"Never Seen the Rain" by Tones and I rose one place to number nine off the back of a good sales week and finally "Lose You to Love Me" by Selena Gomez seems set to leave the top ten dropping one place to number ten.

Gains

It was good news for Harry Styles ahead of the release of his sophomore album "Fine Line" with "Watermelon Sugar" the biggest climber this week up eighteen places to 20 other than that not too many major gains although 'Total Control" by Meduza feat. Becky Hill and Goodboys rose four places to 15.

Re-Entries

One return this week with the surprise winner of ARIA song of the year "Choir" by Guy Sebastian back at 45.

Losers
Kanye West's "Follow God" was the biggest loser again this week as it fell nine places to 40 as did "Slide Away" by Miley Cyrus which dropped from 40 to 49.

Drop Outs

The only song I am somewhat sad to see gone is "Motivation" by Normani, it had a really strange chart run, I'd be very pleasantly surprised if it makes the year end list.

"Panini" by Lil Nas X is more of a chance of making the year end list after it's exit this week while Post Malone's "Goodbyes" feat. Young Thug definitely will make the year end list.

Also gone is Onefour's "In The Beginning" after all the controversy faded.

New Entries

Lewis Capaldi's dull new single 'Before You Go" is the biggest new entry of the week at number 24.

The best of the three new arrivals is in at 35 with Khalid's "Up All Night" while finally Ant Saunders has his first single on the ARIA singles chart with "Yellow Hearts" new in at 37.

So that ends this week, expecting the start of the onslaught of Christmas music this week plus the two new singles from The Weeknd and maybe a re-entry for Mental as Anything following the death of Andrew "Greedy" Smith.

Charting 1996: 1st December. Big gains for Savage Garden and Toni Braxton

So the year is winding down and we're seeing a real bun fight for spots on the year end list as the songs that will likely be hits in 1997 start rising up the charts however let's start with the top ten wher the Spice Girls spend yet another week at number one with "Wannabe" and there is nothing getting even vaguely close to this song right now.

Not even "What's Love Got to Do With Love It" by Warren G and Adina Howard which defied my prediction last week to stay at number two but that challenge from No Mercy's "Where Do You Go?" which remains at number three but there's definitely a likelihood that this will move to number two.

"I Love You Always Forever" by Donna Lewis remains at number four and looks set to start falling away.

Unfortunately what has finally broken into the top five is the awful cover of Dan Hill's "Sometimes When We Touch" by Newton which climbed one place to number five. Ugh

However it did push the MUCH worse "Macarena" by Los Del Rios down one place to number six, this song is on the way out gracefully and will finish the year as the number one song for the year. (Wait to see my worst list for my views on this song).

"Don't Stop Movin'" by Livin' Joy moved up two places to number seven on the back of a decent week, it pushed back "Lets make a Night to Remember" by Bryan Adams to numer eight.

"I Live for You" by Chynna Phillips is up one place to number nine (I honestly do not understand the appeal of this song), pushing "It's All Coming Back to me Now" by Celine Dion back to number ten.


Gains

Savage Garden have had a huge gain this week with "To the Moon and Back" up to 16 from 38 while Toni Braxton rose ten places to 18 with "Un-Break My Heart"

Rising country star Shania Twain rose from 37 to 24 with "(If You're Not in it for Love) I'm Outta Here"...a song that I actually really like.


Keith Sweat's "Twisted" rose ten places to 37 while Puff Johnson's "Over and Over" leapt nine places to 41. Babybird's "Gorgeous" jumped nine places to 34.

Re-Entries
Garbage's "Milk" is the biggest return this week at 44 while La Bouche's "Fallin' In Love" is back at 45.

Losers

Unfortunately "Change the World" by Eric Clapton slumped from 31 to 50 this week however I think it will make the year end list. Fugees "Ready Or Not" plunged to 46 from 33.

Toni Braxton may have had one of the week's biggest gainers but she also had one of the week's biggest losers with 'You're Makin' Me High" plunging hard to 35 from 13

Several songs dropped ten places this week including Mack Morrison's"Return of the Mack" to 49, New Edition's "Hit Me Off" to 42 and B.B.E's "Seven Days and One Week" to 36

New Entries

Three new entries this week with Amber's euro-dance single "This is Your Night' the biggest debut of the week at number 32.

Former Take That member Mark Owen has released his debut solo single called "Child" and it's debuted at number 33.

In a year that's already been dominated by covers, Fugees new entry at umber 39 is a cover of Bob Marley's "No Woman, No Cry"

Rounding out the new entries are The Cranberries at number 48 with 'When You're Gone"

Charting 1996: November 24th.

We are nearly at the end of 1996 and really this week's chart is kind of slow especially in the top ten mostly because there were small changes apart from the very bottom of the top ten so let's get to it where for yet another week, it's the Spice Girls at number one with "Wannabe", I don't see anything get near it right now as this song is a monster hit.

Warren G feat. Adina Howard's "What's Love Got to Do With It" is doing its best by remaining at number 2 but it has competition for that song coming from "Where Do You Go" by No Mercy up two places to number 3, this song might well be the closest threat to "Wannabe" even though it's at 3.

It pushed back "I Love You Always Forever" by Donna Lewis to number four and "Macarena" by Los Del Rios to five, both of these songs are starting to lose steam now.

Unfortunately lingering like a toxic fucking fungus at number six is "Sometimes When We touch". Get rid of this shit already.

Same can be said for "Let's Make a Night to Remember" by Bryan Adams at number 7.

Celine Dion's "It's All Coming Back to me now" remains at number 8 this week meanwhile "Don't Stop Movin'" by Livin' Joy jumped one place to number 9.

Finally rounding out the top ten is the latest arrival which is "I Live for You" by Chynna Phillips...uh what?...anyway it climbed six places to reach number ten.

Gains

However the biggest gain this week came for Toni Braxton's new single "Un-Break My Heart" which roared from 41 to 28.

Human Nature's "Wishes" rose from 22 to break into the top 20 at 16.

Michael Jackson's "Stranger in Moscow" climbed from 30 to 18 this week while "Mach S" by The Presidents of the United States rose from 36 to 29.

Finally Tori Amos "Hey Jupiter/Professional Widow" rose from 42 to 35.

Losers
Los Del Mar feat. Pedro Castano's version of "Macarena" is on the way out as it tumbled hard from 35 to 49 while Bone Thugs-N-Harmony's "Tha Crossroads" which really hasn't caught fire here as it had in the US as it fell from 34 to 46.

Former chart topper "Because You Loved Me" by Celine Dion collapsed from 43 to 28 while New Edition's "Hit Me Off" dropped from 21 to 32.

New Entries

So we have a bunch of new entries with the highest debut coming British electronic duo The Chemical Brothers as "Setting Sun" enters at 34.

In at 37 is American country singer Shania Twain with her new single "(If You're Not in it for Love) O'm Outta Here" while Savage Garden have released their follow up to "I Want You" with "To the Moon and Back" in at 38.

Musical project known as Babybird have hit the ARIA chart at number 45 with "You're Gorgeous" and finally founder of the early nineties new jack swing sound, Keith Sweat is in at number 47 with "Twisted"

That wraps up this week's edition of Charting 1996.

ARIA singles top ten/Chart Review: 25th November. Billie's "Everything I Wanted" debuts at two

So yet again another pretty quiet week apart from the new entries most of which I doubt will stick around and were mostly low enough to not really have much impact except for one song which we'll get to in our top ten where for a seventeenth week, "Dance Monkey" by Tones and I stays at number one and yet again I have no idea what the hell is going to top it unless Adele finally comes the hell out of nowhere in the last few weeks of 2019.

"Dance Monkey" did enough on streaming and sales to ensure that "Everything I Wanted" by Billie Eilish debuted at number two but I don't see this sticking around as it's leaking on streaming and sales, Billie's song unfortunately tend to debut high but don't stay high.

I also don't see "Roxanne" by Arizona Zevas back to number three getting close to number one because while streaming is excellent, sales are atrocious and there's only so much time that streaming will hang around especially when the next idiotic trap song comes along.

Billie Eilish's arrival also pushed "Memories" by Maroon 5 back two places to number four, thank you so much, Billie!. Probably means this song will not make a play for number one now.

In fact most of the rest of the top ten were also pushed back by "Everything I Wanted" with "Ride It" by Regard dropping two places to number five and "Circles" by Post Malone back two to number six,

Lizzo's "Good As Hell" clung on to number seven while Dua Lipa dropped two places to number eight with "Don't Start Now" but I expect this song to get an ARIA awards performance based boost this week.

Selena Gomez is in the firing line over her American Music Awards performance as the mediocre "Lose You to Love Me" dropped one place to number 9.

Finally, Tones and I's second song in the top ten "Never Seen the Rain" remains stuck at number ten mostly because streaming is letting it down.

Gains

The biggest gain of the week belongs to Taylor Swift's "Lover" rose from 43 to 13 thanks to the Shawn Mendes remix but beyond that? "Lights Up" by Harry Styles moved up from 31 to 27 mostly because of something in our new entries that we'll get to.

Losers
'
Kanye West had a bad week as "Follow God" was the biggest loser of the week as it tumbled hard to 31, he has unfortunately made his love song to controversial American fast food chain Chick-Fil-A the next single and the video is pretty terrible.

What is also unfortunate is that "Motivation" by Normani is down to 41...this song just hasn't taken off the way it should have and I am not sure why. Lil Nas X's "Panini" fell to 48.


Drop Outs

Look I am not really complaining too much here especially when we've lost shitty TikTok crap "Ran$om" by Lil Tecca (will make the year end list sadly), the horrendous "Look at Her Now" by Selena Gomez which may as well have been made on TikTok and Diplo's continued failure at ripping off country with "Lonely" feat. the Jonas Brothers ( who have spent 2019 being mediocre to awful)

Really only said to see "Trigger" by Major Lazer featuring Khalid and :"Choir" by Guy Seastian gone but with the latter's song of the year win at the ARIAs, I expect to see it's return next week.

New Entries

So apart from "Everything I wanted" by Billie Eilish at number two, we got Harry Styles promo single "Watermelon Sugar" at number 38.

Controversial Western Sydney Youtube rap group OneFour land "In the Beginning at number 39.

Lauv returns with LANY in tow for the underwhelming "Mean It" which debuts at 42 and finally Martin Garrix has collaborated with Dean Lewis for "Used to Love" debuting at 46.

So that's the week, I am not sure what to expect with boosts for artists who performed at the ARIAs, we'll have to wait and see. The chart updates at 5pm on Saturday

ARIA Singles top ten/Chart Review: 18th November. Dance Monkey shatters the record

So on an otherwise pretty quiet week overall on the ARIA singles chart however the quiet was obscured by history being made at the very top of the chart with "Dance Monkey" by Tones and I becoming the longest running number one in ARIA Chart history, it's now spent sixteen consecutive weeks at number one usurping the fifteen non consecutive weeks spent at number one by Ed Sheeran's "Shape of You" in 2017. I've said for a few weeks it looks like the steam is running out but its still doing okay on streaming and on digital sales.

My opinion on "Dance Monkey"? I do like the song a fair bit. It's definitely unique, catchy and a bit of fun. Yes, Tones and I's voice can be a bit hit and miss but I would challenge anyone to come up with somebody who could do bring the same vocal intensity to "Dance Monkey" that Tones and I does

We got a new number two this week courtesy of "Memories" by Maroon 5 jumping two places to number four. Less said the better but it's matching "Dance Monkey" on sales but streams aren't even close right now/

"Ride It" by Regard remains stuck at number three. If other songs leap past this as expected, it's chances at number one are pretty much done unfortunately which is a shame because the song is actually decent.

What looks to be definitely done is "Circles" by Post Malone which dropped two places to number four after weeks of being stuck at number two behind "Dance Monkey", It's bleeding on digital sales and on streaming. 

The lone new entry this week has debuted in the top ten at number five that being the viral streaming sensation "Roxanne" by Arizona Zervas, its doing well on streaming and if it catches up in terms of sales, it could well be a number one hit. Keep an eye on this one.

"Don't Start Now" by Dua Lipa got a two place boost to number six. I expect this song to stay in the top ten as its doing pretty well across the board but needs its streaming numbers to improve to rise higher however it was enough to push Lizzo's "Good As Hell" back to number seven but much like Dua Lipa.

All this pushed "Lose You to Love Me' by Selena Gomez back three places to number five. Honestly, this song is so forgettable I am always surprised ARIA remembered to ut it on the chart.

Speaking of forgettable, "10,000 Hours" by Dan and Shay feat. Justin Bieber which dropped two places to number nine.

Finally, Tones and I remains at number ten for a second consecutive week with "Never Seen the Rain". A song that I expect will rise in the weeks ahead.

Gains
Honestly not too many big gains this week with the biggest being an eight place gain for "Lose Control" by Meduza feat. Becky Hill and Goodboys but apart from that, it's pretty quiet.

Re-entries

Just the one re-entry coming from Taylor Swift with "Lover" back at number 43 thanks mostly to the release of a remix of the song featuring Shawn Mendes...that I think is kind of pointless because it really doesn't add anything to an already good song but if the song becomes a hit because of it I guess I'll take it.

Losers
Biggest loser this week is "How Do You Sleep?" by Sam Smith which fell nine places to 32 in the only sizeable drop this week. "Choir" by Guy Sebastian tumbled six places to 49. I'd mention Kanye but prosperity gospel dressed up as Christianity shouldn't be on the charts.

Drop Outs

Not complaining about our two drop outs this week with both "Bandit" by Juice WRLD and Young Boy Never Broke Again and "Hot" by Young Thug and Gunna both gone. Good riddance to bad rubbish.

New Entries
As I mentioned there was only one new entry inside the top 50 and that was "Roxanne" by Arizona Zervas at number five,

So yeah a really quiet week but with Billie Eilish likely to cause a major disturbance to the top ten next week, things are about to get interesting. The chart updates on Saturday at 5pm.

Charting 1996: 17th November

So this week was interesting especially in terms of two songs that have made an impact in the topten...just not the top four because for a third week, "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls stays at number one, its just dominant at the moment which is not surprising considering how god damn catchy the song manages to be. 

It's well ahead of it's nearest challenger "What's Love got to do with it" by Warren G feat. Adina Howard at number two, it just can't bridge the margin to "Wannabe" right now, that said it's comfortably ahead of "I Love You Always Forever" by Donna Lewis at number three and "Macarena" by Los del Rios at number four.

What looks like being a challenger for number one  is at number five with No Mercy's "Where Do You Go" jumping five places to reach number two, this song is huge right now, folks.

Remaining in their slots from last week are "Sometimes When We touch" by Newton at number six, "Let's Make it a Night to Remember" by Bryan Adams at number seven and "It's All Coming Back to Me now" by Celine Dion at number eight.

Toni Braxton drops four places to number nine with "You're Makin' Me High" and finally Livin' Joy have risen eight places to reach the top ten at number ten with "Don't Stop Movin'"

Gains

Deborah Cox has had one of the biggest gains of the week with "Who Do U Love" up from forty one to twenty four while The Corrs also had a good climb from thirty eight to twenty five.

Michael Jackson's "Stranger in Moscow" is up six places to thirty while Quad City DJs rose from forty two to thirty three with "C'mon N' Ride It (The Train)".

Losers

Pearl Jam lost most of their gains this week with "Hail, Hail dropping hard to forty five while George Michael's "The Spinning Wheel EP" dropped to forty six. Eric Clapton's "Change the World" fell to thirty one.

Dead Or Alive's 96 remix of "You Spin Me Round (Like A Record)" dropped to thirty seven.

New Entries

Just two new entries this week with the highest debut being Toni Braxton's follow up to "You're Makin' Me High" titled "Un-Break My Heart" - a pretty solid ballad that shows off her vocals, it's in at forty one.

Speaking of R & B, Puff Johnson is also back with "Over and Over" at number 50.

A slow week overall, next the ARIA chart for this week in 2019 and it's even more quiet over there except for another record broken by our number one. See ya all soon.

ARIA Singles top ten/Chart Review: 11th November. Another record for Dance Monkey

So this week turned out pretty interesting as the week after an album bomb turns out be especially when the album bomb is as disinteresting and terrible as the Kanye West "Jesus is King" album bomb which we'll discuss a bit later because it wasn't a good week for Kanye but first we have to get the biggest story of the week which lies at number one where "Dance Monkey" spends a fifteenth week at number one equalling the record set by Ed Sheeran's 2017 smash "Shape of You", now whether it actually breaks the record is an open question because it lost the sales lead and streaming is starting to finally waver.

The threat to "Dance Monkey" won't be coming from our returning number two "Circles" by Post Malone, as it spent the week losing ground on both sales and streaming. Same could be said for "Ride it" by Regard back up to number three, a possible challenger for number one could well be "Memories" by Maroon 5 up one place to number four as it took the digital sales lead but I guess it will be a wait and see with this one because it's streaming isn't matching the sales.

Selena Gomez drops three places to number five with "Lose You to Love Me" and again I don't see this song as a serious player for number one right even if it's streaming is still good but it's digital sales are falling away.

Lizzo's "Good as Hell" remains steady at number six mostly due to the remix with Ariana Grande that ARIA aren't giving Ariana credit for.

"10,000 Hours" by Dan and Shay feat. Justin Bieber continues its rather nauseating presence in the top ten up one place to number seven.

Now we get to the highest charting new entry this week and it comes from Dua Lipa, her new single "Don't Start Now" has arrived at number eight and making prediction of replacing Kanye in the top ten correct.

"Hot Girl Bummer" by Blackbear continues to be a toxic and unwelcome presence in the top ten as it rose one place to number nine.

Tones and I has a second appearance in the top ten this week as "Never Seen The Rain" jumps two places to return to number ten.

Gains

Almost everything gained this week with Kanye West's album bomb dying in the arse as it deserved to so I am going to cover the massive gains only, the biggest gain was for Meduza's "Total Control" feat. Becky Hill and Goodboys as it climbed from forty two to twenty eight. This song is quietly gaining momen

As is "Trampoline" by Shaed thanks to an unaccredited remix from Zayn Malik, it jumped thirteen places to number thirty.

"Panini" by Lil Nas X jumped from forty eight to thirty four.

Finally, Miley Cyrus single "Slide Away" rose ten places to thirty nine.

Re-entries

We got a slew of re entries this week and honestly, I wish they were better. The best of them is "Eastside" by Benny Blanco feat. Halsey and Khalid back at 45 but really it is time that song left the chart for good.

The rest are pretty damn terrible with the biggest return coming from Diplo and Jonas Brother's 'faux ccountry' collaboration "Lonely" back at 41 while the  terrible "Only Human" by Jonas Brothers is back at 44...seriously?

"Post Malone" by Sam Feldt and Rani returns at 42 (a song I just don't care about),

The worst of the returns is probably "Bandit" by Juice WRLD and Youngboy Never Broke Again which returned at 47.

Losses

So not many big losses this week with the biggest fall coming for Selena Gomez song "Look at Her Now" falling from 29 to 37 which I am fine with as the song blows arse and oh "Follow God" by Kanye West dropped seven places to 14.

Drop Outs

Every single song  from Jesus is King other than "Follow God" that charted last week dropped out this week...Good fucking riddance.



New Entries

So apart from "Don't Start Now" by Dua Lipa at number eight, what else new did we get this week?

At number 46 is the new Death stranding collaboration from Major Lazer and Khalid called 'Trigger"...its not bad at all check it out.

However the best of the new entries comes from two New Zealand acts collaborating with "Catching Feelings" by Drax Project and Six60 new in at 48,

Sadly, the worst of the new entries is from rappers Young Thug and Gunna with "Hot" arriving at number 49.

That wraps up the week, I think the biggest new arrival might be from Arizona Zervas with "Roxanne", the numbers I'm seeing has it on track for a top five debut possibly, we'll have to see when ARIA releases the updated chart on Saturday at 5pm AEDT

Charting 1996: 10th November

This week saw an epic leap into the top ten and a new Madonna single arrive on the chart along with a slew of other new arrivals but we'll get to all that in second, no mucking around, let's get stuck into the top ten where the Spice Girls remain at number one for a second week with "Wannabe" and honestly, this song looks like being almost as big as the "Macarena" was.

We do have a new number two this week in the form of "What's Love Got to Do With It" by Warren G feat. Adina Howard which blew up three places to number two, I would suggest this song could make a challenge for number one in the weeks ahead.

It's certainly not going to come from "I Love You Always Forever" by Donna Lewis down one place to three or from "Macarena" by Los Del Rios which got pushed back to number four or "You're Making Me HIgh" by Toni Braxton back one place to five.

In fact it's arguable that these three songs are under pressure from their continued unfortunate number six for another week, "Sometimes when we touch" by Newtown which stayed steady for another week.

Also on the way up is "Let's Make a Night to remember" by Bryan Adams which rose one place to number seven and "It's All coming back to me Now" by Celine Dion also up one to number eight.

The Remembrandts were the major losers in the reshuffle as "I'll Be There For You" tumbled two places to number nine.

Finally rounding out the top ten is one of the biggest moves of 1996 I think I've seen with No Mercy's debut hit "Where Do You Go" up FORTY places to number ten. Unbelievable.

Gainers

We've already discussed No Mercy's rise but Underworld's "Born Slippy" rose from thirty eight to twenty four this week. This song could well be a hit.

In good news for Aussie boyband Human Nature, the ballad "Wishes" rose from forty one to twenty eight.

Also a big boost for Pearl Jam's "Hail, Hail" which climbed to thirty one from forty six while Michael Jackson's "Stranger in Moscow" climbed from forty eight to reach thirty six

Re-Entries

Speaking of Michael Jackson, his collaboration with 3T "Why" is back yet again this time at number forty nine.

Losers

Metallica's "Hero of the Day" slipped hard this week to number forty four from thirty one, there was also a bad fall for the Fun Lovin' Criminals hit "Scooby Snacks" which went stale having fallen to forty seven from thirty two last week.

However neither matched the twenty place fall suffered by Neneh Cherry's "Woman" which crash landed at forty five or that of the twenty place fall for "Macarena" by Los Del Mar feat. Pedro Castano to thirty four.

"Tha Crossroads" by Bone Thugs-N-Harmony dropped ten places to thirty three.

New Entries

The biggest debut of the week comes from Madonna this week, she's arrived at number eleven with "You MMust Love Me" which comes from the soundtrack to her upcoming movie "Evita"

Back on the chart with a new single are The Presidents of the United States of America and they are in at number thirty two with "Mach 5"

Quad City DJs want us to help them "C'mon N' Ride It (The Train)" up the chart as it debuted at number forty two.

American singer-songwriter Tori Amos has hit the chart with "Professional Widow" at number forty three,

Garbage have landed at number forty eight with their new single "Milk" and finally La Bouche's latest single "Fallin' in Love' jumps in at number fifty.

I'll be surprised if many or any of the new entries stick arund but we'll have to wait and see.

Kulcha's "Do You Like it?" slipped nine places to thirty seven while "That Girl" by Maxi Priest feat. Shaggy slumped nine to 46.

Charting 1996: 3rd November: A NEW NUMBER ONE!!!!

It finally happened, we finally have a change at the very top of the charts and numerous shifts up and down the top 50 this week but straight to the big news after nine long weeks at number one "Macarena" by Los Del Rios has finally been unseated by British all girl pop group..vb .yes, the Spice Girls have taken the number one spot with "Wannabe" and this song looks like it might have some staying power at number one with strong sales. The song is certainly catchy enough to be a long term number one hit.

The strength of our new number one is bad news for our number two for another week "I Love You Always Forever" by Donna Lewis which got overtaken by "Wannabe" on sales. I don't see this going to number one however the rise of "Wannabe" and the strength of "I Love You Always Forever" pushed "Macarena" by Los Del Rios back to number three as it lost ground on sales and just couldn't match it with the two songs ahead of it. 

However "Macarena" still had the strength to stay above "You're Makin' Me High" by Toni Braxton which couldn't bridge the gap so remained at number four for another week.

The big mover into the top ten is "What's Love Got to Do With It" by Warren G feat. Adina Howard which leapt from thirteen to number five this week. I don't mind this, sure Adina Howard hasn't anything on Tina Turner's vocals but she sings the chorus well.

Unfortunately Newton's "Sometimes When We touch" cover reminds at number six. CAN WE GET RID OF THIS SHIT ALREADY?

The Remembrandts fall two places to number seven with I'll Be There for You" while "Let's Make A Night to Remember" by Bryan Adams and "It's All Coming Back to Me Now" by Celine Dion stay at eight and nine respectively.

Finally we have "Lover Lover" by Jimmy Barnes falling three places to number ten.

Gains

So Livin' Joy's "Don't Stop Movin'" jumped big from thirty six to eighteen this week in one of the big moves of the week. Also making gains is Sheryl Crow's "If It Makes You Happy" as it jumped from 34 to 23 this week.
Belinda Carlisle might also be set for a shift into the top ten next week as "In Too Deep" jumped from 20 to 11



Losses

Jewel's 'Who will Save Your Soul" continued its slide down ten places to forty seven. BoDeans Party of Five theme 'Close.r to Free" slid nine places to 39. Former top ten hit "That Girl" by Maxi Priest feat. Shaggy collapsed ten spots to 37 while "Mother Mother" by Tracy Bonham stumbled twelve places to thirty five.

Also taking a fall was Metallica's "Hero of the Day" which plunged from 16 to 31.

New Entries

We have a slew of new entries this week with the biggest coming from American singer songwriter Tonu Childs whose single "Many Rivers To Cross" became the highest charting new single this week at number 12. Not really a fan of it but I guess good for Toni.


"Dance Into the Light" by Phil Collins has found it's way onto the chart at number 36 to notch another charting hit in Australia for Collins.

Another singer - songwriter but this time Canadian Deborah Cox is in at number 42 with "Who Do U Love".

Most curiously though, there's new boy band from out of the US and they look to be set to notch world wide success, the Backstreet Boys debut single "Get Down (You're The One" for me) enters at number 44.

Pearl Jam are back this time with a single called "Hail, Hail" at number 46 and finally an American/German boy band called No Mercy have their debut single "Where Do You Go?" on the ARIA chart at number 50

ARIA Singles Chart Top Ten/ Chart Review: 4th November

I am switching things this week, normally I do Charting 1996 first but because I want to get in and deal with this pain in the neck of a crappy Jesus is King album bomb from Kanye West, I wanted to get this week's ARIA chart wrap up done first and Kanye isn't even the only one with a new arrival in the top ten so speaking of the top ten, let's start at the very top where for a fourteenth week, "Dance Monkey" by Tones and I reigns supreme at number one making it the longest number one of the year surpassing Lil Nas X's "Old Town Road" and leaving it a week away from equalling Ed Sheeran's 2017 smash "Shape Of You" for the record of longest number one of the decade.

I would normally say the closest challenger is at number two but that isn't the case with that number two being a new entry from Selena Gomez called "Lose You to Love Me" and the reason I say I don't believe the song can challenge for number one, it's already losing ground to other songs on both streaming and sales. I'm not even sure anyone will remember this song in a week or two, it's that bland and boring.

It's in a vulnerable position to Post Malone's "Circles" which got pushed back to number three this week but it's still very strong on sales and streaming and will possibly return to number two next week.

"Ride It' by Regard remains at number four this week and I actually see this song making a run for number two soon as it's got strength across the board.

"Memories" by Maroon 5 dropped two places to number five but I suspect that may have been due to the strength of above songs rather than any weakness so this song ain't going away any time soon.

What was a nice surprise was the arrival of Lizzo's "Good As Hell" to the top ten as the biggest gainer of the week up from 15 to 6 following the release of a remix with Ariana Grande however Ariana is not credited on the song by ARIA this week.

We've reached the second of the new entries to the top ten and the first of ten new Kanye West songs debuting in the ARIA top 50 this week, "Follow God" at number seven and really I'd be surprised if this song stayed in the top ten, I expect it to be replaced by Dua Lipa's new single "Don't Start Now" when that song arrives on the chart next week. Hey, it'd be a great song replacing a god damn shit one.

"10,000 Hours" by Dan and Shay feat. Justin Bieber drops three places to number eight (I hope people are growing tired of that nauseating load of trash. Dan and Shay are capable of so much better. I've given up on expecting better from Bieber)

Travis Scott also suffered a three place fall to number nine with "Highest in the Room" mostly due to the song being underwhelming in the first place.

Finally "Hot Girl Bummer" by Blackbear fell two places to number ten but because it's holding steady on streaming, this junk won't be leaving the top ten any time soon. Ewww.

Gains

Apart from Lizzo's "Good As Hell" jumping into the top ten, there were very little in the way of gains this week which is the norm in an album bomb week.

Losers

While not many gains there were some massive losers with the biggest being "Goodbyes" by Post Malone and Young Thug which plunged from 31 to 47 while "Panini" by Lil Nas X stumbled hard from 33 to 48. "Slide Away" by Miley Cyrus lived up to its name by sliding from 35 to 49 and Kygo and Whitney Houston's "Higher Love" just went lower as it hit 50 from 34.

However there were more big losers with "Motivation" by Normani dropping from 28 to 41...ouch.

"Sunflower" by Post Malone and Young Thug finally dropped off the Billboard Hot 100 in the US this week after a full year on the American charts, it's still hanging on in Australia despite falling 11 places to 38.
Finally "It's You" by Ali Gatie dropped ten places to 35.

Drop outs

So while Kanye in flicked a lot of crummy music on the chart this week he also did a good job cleaning out crap that won't make year end list like "Harleys in Hawaii" by Katy Perry, "Takeaway" by The Chainsmokers feat. Illennium and Lennon Stella, "F*** I'm Lonely" by Lauv and Anne-Marie,  "Only Human" by Jonas Brothers and "Bandit by Juice WRLD and Young Boy Never Broke Again (although "Bandit" could return but I sure as hell hope not)

Also utter crap but will make the year end list and most likely my worst hits of the year list "No Guidance" by Chris Brown and Drake and "Lalala" by Y2K and bbno$

Songs gone that I really don't care about or are underwhelming: "Don't Call Me Angel" by Ariana Grande, Miley Cyrus and Lana Del Rey and "Post Malone" by Sam Feldt and Rani

Long time hits that finally took their exit but will make year end: "Eastside" by Benny Blanco feat. Halsey and Khalid, "Shallow" by Lady Gaga and Bradley Cooper.

Finally the only song that I am sad to see gone is "Lover" by Taylor Swift, its genuinely a good song, who knows, it might make the year end list.

Keep in mind some of these drop outs will likely be back next week.

New Entries

Let's blow through the other nine Kanye West songs to hit the chart this week beginning with "Selah" at 19, "Closed on Sunday" (his garbage dedication to Chick Fil A) at 19, "On God" at 21, "Everything We Need" at 26,  "Every Hour" at 33, "Use This Gospel" at 36, "Water" at 37, "God Is" at 39 and finally, "Hands On" at 46. I expect most of this to be gone next week and good riddance to all of it.

Kanye wasn't the only one with new music on the chart this week with Selena Gomez second release in this cycle "Look At Her Now" debuting at 29 (that song isn't good at all).

It's saying something that "Total Control" by Meduza feat. Becky Hill and Goodboys is the best of the new entries at number 42.

That wraps up a pretty crummy album bomb week, hopefully not much of this Kanye mess sticks around and we see Dua Lipa land a top ten debut for "Don't Start Now" next week. ARIA will update the chart at 5pm on Saturday

ARIA Singles chart review: October 28th. Top ten turns to pot.

So for the last couple of weeks I have been ignoring the signs that the top ten is starting to look really awful especially as what has been arriving in the top ten has been...yikes...the issues aren't at number one where "Dance Monkey" by Tones and I spends a thirteenth week at number one however there's signs that this song's time at number one might soon be over as it wavered on digital sales this week and that gap on streaming is closing that said it did equal "Old Town Road" by Lil Nas X for most weeks spent at number one this year.

"Circles" by Post Malone is that song closing the gap on streaming as it remained at number two this week. I wouldn't mind if this song went to number one...just a pity the digital sales aren't better.

"Memories" by Maroon 5 keeps its bland and boring presence at number three, we really want a "Girls Like You" retread in the top 5, Australia?

"Ride It" by Regard, a song I think could be a future number one, rose two places to number four this week as it got boosts on streaming, it pushed "10,000 Hours" by Dan and Shay feat. Justin Bieber back to number five (Such a shame this nauseating mess of a song is Dan and Shay's breakthrough hit in Australia), I suspect given Selena Gomez looks on track for at least a top five debut and is likely to bring Kanye with her that this song will fall out of the top five which given what Selena and Kanye are bringing, I'll take the nauseating over the plain bad.

Speaking of plain bad and awful we have a trifecta of absolute garbage infectng positions seven through nine with "One Thing Right" by Marshmello and Kane Brown one place to seven, "Hot Girl Bummer" by Blackbear up two to number eight and "Someone You Loved" by Lewis Capaldi returning to the top ten at number nine.

Our biggest gainer of the week is the new arrival tno the top ten that being "Never Seen The Rain" by Tones and I which jumped from twenty one to ten most likely on the back of "Dance Monkey" being number one and people curious about what other music Tones and I has released.

Gains

Already mentioned our biggest gainer so what else gained big? Well, "Castles" by Freya Ridings jumped from thirty six to twenty nine as that song seems to have plenty of traction right now but that's about it for the big gains.

Losers 

So the Charlie's Angels movie soundtrack got released today which means "Don't Call Me Angel" by Ariana Grande, Miley Cyrus and Lana Del Rey should get a boost soon and boy it needs that boost because it fell ten places to forty nine although I do suspect people feel Ariana is a little over exposed this year.

Also joining the crap that lost hard this week is "F*** I'm Lonely" by Lauv and Anne-Marie which feel from thirty five to forty four.

The big news in terms of losses was that former chart topper "Senorita" by Shawn Mendes and Camila Cabello finally fell out of the top ten to number fourteen.  "Lights Up" by Harry Styles which fell from seven to fifteen (not surprising, Songs from One Direction members don't stay high post debut)

Drop Outs

Four drop outs and honestly I am really only sad to lose "Johnny Run Away" by Tones and I, it might ust snare a place on the year end list and maybe a place on my best hits of the year list.

The rest gone are probably no chance of year end with "Boyfriend" by Social House and Ariana Grande, "Writing on the Wall" by French Montana feat. Post Malone and Cardi B and "Saint-tropez" by Post Malone all gone...thank goodness.

New Entries

So the highest debut of the week belongs to Katy Perry's "Harleys in Hawaii" - a song I expect to be gone next week when Kanye West's likely but unfortunate album bomb swings in next week, but anyway it debuted at thirty six.

A song that has been huge in Europe but took it's sweet damn time in reaching the Australian charts has finally entered the ARIA singles chart at forty five that being "Post Malone" by Sam Feldt and Rani

Shaed's "Trampoline" is new in at 47 after becoming the surprise indie pop hit in the US.

Finally, the worst of the new debuts is "Bandit" by Juice WRLD and Young Boy Never Broke Again at number forty eight. Kanye will likely sweep this shit off the chart and while Kanye's album isn't good, getting rid of this crap can only be a good thing.

The chart updates at 5pm AEDT on Saturday, I am expecting a "Jesus is King" album bomb and at least one new song from Selena Gomez.
















Travis Scott's "HIghest in the Room" fell back to number six as people forget this song exists.