Justin Bieber is back with
a new single entitled “Yummy” after spending some time away from music…okay,
not completely away, he has been a guest artist on others songs like
“Despacito” by Luis Fonsi and Daddy Yankee, the two DJ Khaled songs/posse cuts
that I’ve completely forgotten about and “10,000 Hours” by Dan and Shay last
year, “Yummy” is the first single from the new album that’s supposed to be
coming this year and with Bieber looking to go down the R ‘n’ B lane, I was kind
of interested so what did we get from the Biebs on “Yummy” and was it a delight
to the ears?
Honestly, “Yummy’ is the sort
of song that leaves you with that feeling in the pit of your tummy that this meal
is not at all yummy and a complaint needing to be delivered to the chef or the
chefs that cooked this up because what Justin Bieber has served up as his lead
off single for a brand new album is some of the most bargain barrel and lazy
trend hopping I’ve seen in some time, there is no creativity on display in the
instrumentation AT ALL with pop fused with trap that fucking Post Malone did
better on “Hollywood’s Bleeding”. “Yummy’ doesn’t even give have a satisfying
pay off within the instrumentation among the pop/trap drear.
Although considering those
behind the production include Sasha Sirota (featured artist on Zac Brown’s atrocious
song “Swayze”) and Poo Bear (also has a credit on the last Zac Brown Band
album) its not really surprising the instrumentation and production on this
song suck.
The boring instrumentation means
we’re forced to focus on the lyrics and honestly? The lyrics are terrible with
that chorus being one of of the most bargain barrel and lazy I’ve heard in some
time, he repeats “yummy-yum” six times and ‘babe’ six times, I mean come on THREE
people (In this case Bieber, Ashley Boyd and Poo Bear) sitting around a table
should be able to come up with a better chorus than this:
“Yeah, you got that yummy-yum
That yummy-yum, that
yummy-yummy
Yeah, you got that
yummy-yum
That yummy-yum, that
yummy-yummy
Say the word, on my way
Yeah babe, yeah babe, yeah
babe
Any night, any day
Say the word, on my way
Yeah babe, yeah babe, yeah
babe
In the mornin' or the late
Say the word, on my way”
Also I can’t help but think
that “Yummy-yum” is rhyming slang for “eating out’ and I don’t mean at a
restaurant or fast food (think sexual innuendo and then be completely grossed
out)
Also if the song is about his
wife Hailey then why the hell does he call her a stallion in the first verse? A
stallion is a male horse!.
The prechorus contains the
proverbial bragging about money with Justin begging Hailey to help him spend the
millions they have between him (like his fans could connect to having millions of
dollars and yet again the instrumentation doesn’t much that feeling of that
much god damn luxury.
So the instrumentation and
the lyrics are garbage, what about Justin Bieber himself? Well, it doesn’t help
Bieber sings the chorus with the same amount of enthusiasm or passion that I
have for putting on still damp socks, he sounds bored out of his mind, if this
is a love song you’d think Bieber would insert some passion into his vocals
especially on the chorus where midway through he leaps into a Post Malone
cadence because somehow he has to make the song INTERESTING.
If Justin Bieber wants to go
down the R’n’ B lane, he could do better by getting in contact with Usher or at
least stars within the R’n’B fold that can make the songs smooth as all hell
and sexier than this mess rather than working with Poo Bear who seems to get
around as much as bloody Marshmello.
"Yummy" isn't a good sign for what we might get on this new album because if it's more garbage like this than...oh dear.
Avoid this song like its got
a food poisoning warning over it because you’ll end up with a bad tummy ache in
the end.
Rating; 1/10
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