All 4 1994: January 16th Wishing Green Limousine on Maximum Overdrive

 Week two of 1994 and we have a fairly interestong week in prospect on the ARIA singles chart with plenty of movement in the top ten and outside of it as well however let's begin with the top ten where the big story of the week is our new number one that being "Boom! Shake the Room" by DJ Jazzy Jeff & The Fresh Prince. it got enough sales to just nab the numbher one spot this week thanfully ending the five week reign at number one by "Please Forgive Me" by Bryan Adams which fell back to number two and doesn't look to be a threat to number one anymore

I'd say...unfortunately...the threat to our new number one is coming from "All For Love" by Bryan Adams, Rod Stewart and Sting which got a two place boost to number three.

"Shoop" by Salt 'N' Pepa is the only song in the top ten that didn't move as it remains glued to the number four spot. "All That She Wants" by Ace of Base slid two places to number five as it looks to be on the downswing now. 

M People's "Moving On Up" lives up to it's name by moving up three places to number six...this has momentum behind it so I can see this climbing higher in the weeks ahead.

Speaking of momentum also up three spots to seven is "Hero" by Mariah Carey...a song that's fine enough but not Mariah's best song however it did move past "Creep" Radiohead at number eight and "Got to Get It" by Culture Beat at number nine.

Finally a new arrival to the top ten, moving up nine places is Cut 'N' Move's cover of KC and the Sunshine Band's "Give It Up"

Losers

Lets rip our way through the biggest losers of the week starting from "Sweat (A La La La La Long)" by Inner Circle finally making it's way out down nine places to 46. 

Efua's "Somewhere" slides from 35 to 41 this week as it hit the downswing. "Go West" by Pet Shop Boys took the wrong direction and went south seven places to 30.

Meatloaf's "Rock and Roll Dreams Comr Through" dipped from 18 to 23 while 'The Weight" by Jimmy Barnes and The Badloves fell out of the top ten down six to number 12.

Re-Entries

Just the one re-entry with "Dur dur d'etre bebe" by Jordy returning at 39

Gains

Not too many major gains outside the top ten this week but the one song that seems to have absolutely jumped up the charts is "Slave to the Music" by Twenty 4 Seven feat. Stay-C and Nance which climbed from 28 to 14 this week and looks headed for the top ten at this rate. 

Urban Cookie Collective had a four place gain to 20 with "Feels Like Heaven" while "Hey Mr DJ" by Zhane climbed six places to 21. 

"Where is the Love" by Rick Price and Margaret Urlich rebounded after last week's fall, they are seven to 33. 

New Entries

Four new entries this week, starting with...

49. "Into Your Arms" by The Lemonheads.

So we've got a bunch of bands or groups this week and we start off with an American alternative rock band and I actually like this a fair bit, it's got this solid hooky groove courtesy of those guitars and the drums absolutely kill. I guess the only issue is the vocals, they don't have as much punch or power as I would like but hey, this is still a pretty solid song, hope it sticks around.

47. "Green Limousine" by The Badloves

Fresh off nabbing a top ten hit with Jimmy Barnes in 1993, we've got a new Badloves song and it's pretty mich a blues rock song and look, it's solid but it's not giving me much to say except in terms of the fact it's supposed to be about celebrities who jump aboard any cause's bandwagon if it proves to be fashipnable which is something worth calling out but I reckon the issue deserves a punchier song than this. 

44. "Wishing On the Same Star" by Girlfriend

So Girlfriend's newest effort is a cover of a 1991 song by an American singer songwriter named Keedy with the song written by Diane Warren and honestly I think I like the Gitlfriend version a lot better mostly because they amp up the girls harmonies and Melanie Alexander, who takes the lead vocal on this song can sell this with the sincerity and spirit a song about somebody reminding a loved one that no matter what they are wishing on the star and looking at the same moon and the song has a more lush and warm sound. Definitely dig this, check it out. 

40. "Maximum Overdrive" by 2 Unlimited.

Oh 2 Unlimited again...sigh...I don't have fondness for this group's thumping dance music that's got as much going for it as an empty bucket and yeah...this is just annoying especially with that "woo!" noise punctuating the melody. This is just soulless bleh. Move on.

To no one's surprise, it's the worst of the week. Best of the week is close between The Lemonheads and Girlfriend...I'm going to give it to Girlfriend for "Wishing on the Same Star" but again "Into My Arms" by The Lemonheads is pretty damn good too.

ARIA Singles Top 50 Chart Review: January 13th. Somedays Indigo Push 2 Start a Smile

Well, things have finally started moving on the ARIA singles chart for 2025, we have quite the busy week on hand here so let's get started with the top ten where the top two didn't move with "APT" by Rose and Bruno Mars remains at number one for yet another week, it's lost a bit of it's streaming margin but it's still strong on sales and Youtube, it was enough of a margin to hold sway over "That's So True" by Gracie Abrams at number two, it's gained a bit on streaming but hasn't got as strong a sales or Youtube presence to challenge for number one.

A challenger for the top spot is emerging at number three though with "Messy" by Lola Young up two spots to number three as it gained hard on streaming this week and looks like it might make a run for the top spot.

What won't be making a run at the number one spot are "Die  with a Smile" by Bruno Mars and Lady Gaga down one place to four, "Birds of a Feather" by Billie Eilish down one to number five and "A Bst Song (Tipsy)" by Shaboozey, all three are just naturally just starting to fall back now to make way for new hits.

Speaking of new hits, it looks like "The Days (NOTION Remix)" by Chrystal and Notion is going to get huge as it climbed a massive eleven places to number seven this week, this has streaming momentum so wouldn't be at all surprised if this broke into the top five in the weeks ahead.

The rest of the top ten are 2024 hits with "Espresso" and "Taste" by Sabrina Carpenter with the former remaining at number eight and the latter up one to number nine.

Finally "I Had Some Help" by Post Malone feat Morgan Wallen down one to number ten as it starts to head out of the top ten.

Losers

Yeah we had some massive losers this week mostly older songs that keep appearing on the chart for some reason like "Iris" by The Goo Goo Dolls which fell sixteen places to forty seven, "I Remember Everything" by Zach Bryan and Kacey Musgraves down fifteen to forty three and "Something in the Orange" by Zach Bryan down nine spots to thirty three

However there were also some big falls for some more recent hits like Chappell Roan's "Hot To Go! down twelve to forty five, thankfully "Stumblin' In" by Cyril stumbled down eleven to forty one,"Austin (Boots Stop Working)" by Dasha which slipped eleven to twenty five.

Drop Outs

There were some major drop outs this week with former number ones "Last Night" and "Guess" by Charli XCX feat Billie Eilish both gone. Not complaining though..."Last Night" is still fucking atrocious and "Guess" should make the year end list.

Also gone are "Million Dollar Baby" by Tommy Richman, "I Like the Way You Kiss Me" by Artemas. 
and "Prada" by Casso, Raye and D-Block Europe along with "Scared to Start" by Michael Marcagi and "Ain't No Love in Oklahoma" by Luke Combs

Finally the much older song "Take Me to Church" by Hozier also left.

Gains

So I mentioned the nine place gain for Chrystal and Notion's "The Days" but there wete some significant gains on the chart this week especially for new entries from last week with "BMF" by SZA which gained ten places to seventeen while "Linger (Sirius XM Sessions)" by Royrl Otis climbed  nine places to thirty seven.

"The Door" by Teddy Swims climbed five places to twenty four this week, this song doesn't have the traction "Lose Control" did but I am happy to see this song becoming a sleeper hit.

Re Emtries

However when the other two are "Kisses" by BL3SS and CamrinWatsin (feat. bbyclose) at thirty one and "Slow It Down" by Benson Boone at twenty seven... I'd almost want to question the taste of the Australian public, we could have started 2025 on an even better note without "Slow It Down" especially.

New Entries

Four new entries this week, it's and electic mix of songs but we're starting with

44. "Push 2 Start" by Tyla

Oh finally, another Tyla song has crossed over to the charts only it's a song that isn't on the standard the edition of Tyla's self titled album but rather the deluxe edition of the album called "Tyla+" and I got to be honest here, this is a pretty good song rather than it being great mostly because that drum mixing just feels little off but otherwise yeah, I'll take this with its absolutely gorgeous African amapiano vibe and Tyla's smooth sultry vocal delivery. Check this out. 

38. "Indigo" by Sam Barber and Avery Anna

I've been waiting for American country singer/songwriter Sam Barber to break through in Australia. I've just not really ever been a fan of this, Barber has always felt like way too much of a Zach Bryan knock off and why listen to a knock off when I could listen to the real thing? But with Zach having his issues, it's seems people have gone looking for alternatives and landed on Sam Barber and this song with Avery Anna who is an American country singer who released an album that I never around to hearing and well...this is fine enough, it's a song where this couple is on the edge of a break up and there's a lot of wistful regret as they get set to part ways over sparse guitars, I do wish there was more interplay between Barber and Anna which does kind of hurt the song but it's still good. Check it out. 

36. "Smile" by Morgan Wallen

Sigh...I don't enjoy reviewing Morgan Wallen's music in case you cannot tell, I just find it miserable and his nasal drone makes me think he is singing through a cold but anyway we have this new song and while it's nowhere as contemptible as some of his absolute worst songs...this just isn't any good at all, the beat is too stiff and sterile and Morgan Wallen makes the song all about his jealousy that this girl only smiles when she isn't talking to him. There's this weird condescension that makes this song a painful listen. Next.

34. "Somedays" by Sonny Fodera, D.O.D and Jazzy

So Sonny Fodera is a UK based Australian house producer currently living in London, he teamed up with English producer D.O.D and Irish singer Jazzy who has been notching hits in the UK by featuring on some pretty awful songs with Belters Only but unlike the Belters Only, this song is solid, there's enough of a foundation to this song with that gentle keyboard beat and there's enough sense to ensure that the song isn't a dud plus the lyrics encourage people to not get discouraged, keep fighting and eventually your turn to shine will come. Good song.

That wraps the week and honestly...not too bad! "Smile" by Morgan Wallen nets the worst of the week. I think the best of the week will go to "Push 2 Start" by Tyla as I see myself returning to that song more but it was close.

Next week..I am not sure, we'll have to see. 

Top Ten Worst Hit Songs of 1993

 Ahh...1993...the year Sydney won the hosting rights to the 2000 Olympics, the Waco siege, the then PM Keating denying allegations of having an involvement in a salami venture and Sbane Warne confuses Mike Gatting with the ball of century during the 1993 Ashes series in England but aside from the year being mostly uneventful, how was the popular music of 1993?

Whoo boy, if there was any year that could be stamped as mediocre...1993 would fall into this category which mostly comes from the fact the music industry was still trying to figure out what popular music would sound like in the 1990s because they spent 1990 to 1992 furiously still masturbating over sounds from the 80s that had been tired a long time ago and probably should have been retired, now in 1993, the 80s sounds were still around but they were becoming a thing of the past and the songs that used those sounds haven't aged very well. 

Also should be noted that in 1993, grunge was beginning to coalesce but wouldn't become a true force on the charts until 1994.

1993 was also the year of a few too many cover songs of which a few were for better but mostly for worse and that will be reflected on this list because dear god, there's some garbage that needs to be taken out and disposed of before we deal with the truly good to great hits 1993 gave us so before we dive into the 1993 pop music garbage, lets go through the rules, a song can make this list if it debuts on the year end list from ARIA ib 1993 or peaked higher on the 1993 year end than it did in 1992, there has to be something aggressively wrong with the song to make the list so boring can be a factor but it's never going to be the main reason wby a song makes this list and finally, this is just my opinion,, honestly most top ten best and worst hitt songs lists should just be taken as a creator's opinion anyway.

Alright so n0w that's done, let's get this roadshow of unfiltered garbage on the move, starting with ..

Number Ten

So in 1993, reggae was a thing on the charts and one of the biggest acts on the charts were Jamaican act Inner Circle and honestly, they did provide some variety on the charts in 1993....just a shame their biggest hit is a shocker...

"Sweat (A La La La La Long)" by Inner Circle

I don't mind reggae and at first this song didn't bother me, the chorus is catchy and the instrumentation is bright and cheeful but dig a little deeper, listen to the lyrics and holy hell, does this song get gross, he describes seeing this pretty girl across room smiling at him, goes to talk to her, gets nervous and says "Girl, I want to make you swear, sweat til you can't sweat no more" which is just fucking gross and about as romantic as a guy walking up to a girl and say "Hi, I'd like to give you genital herpes, can we have sex?" 

Oh wait, it gets worse, he tells her if she cries out, he is going to push it some more which is just fucking icky in all the worst ways possible. In short this song with its gauzyproduction that makes reggae sound curdled and ugly, it's the sort of song that makes me feel disgusting by the end of it....enough said, time to move on.

Number Nine

Not much makes my year end worst list on pure annoyance alone but 1992 had plenty of annoying Eurodance and 1993 was no different so....

"Somebody Dance With Me" by DJ Bobo

So unlike the previous song which I said was disgusting and gross, "Somebody Dance With Me" earns its slot on this list for being just an overall form of aural torture to sit through...sure it's not on the same level as my 1992 worst hit "James Brown is Dead' hence why it's lower on this list but dear god, this just makes me want to send a burning dead fetus through a wall especially with those limp ass vocals and a beat more compressed than a rose in a fucking book of thorns...NEXT!

Number Eight

So you might remember that I reviewed this particular song toward the very end of the chart year for 1992 and as it turned out this song made the year end for 1993 because apparently, we cannot have good things anymore. Australia  and further to songs here for being completely annoying.

"Jump" by The Movement

Oh god, give me "Jump" by Kriss Kross because at least the kids in that groip had the fucking charisma to sell the song and not come off as obnoxious as The Movement do here in their commands for people to jump made all the worse by production that lacks a coherent melody and just sounds like noise for kids in nightclubs to get off to...if they possibly can. This should remain forgotten...next!

Number Seven

You know I have come to realize that when making worst hits lists especially for the late 80s and early to mid 90s, there's guaranteed to be a terrible cover or two, songs that sound like pure noise pollution and...Bryan Adams.

"Please Forgive Me" by Bryan Adams

So by 1991. Btyan Adams had gone from being...fine and having a song or two I actually like ("Back to You" and "Can't Stop this Thing We Started") but then he became a glotified simp by releasing the pitifully boring "Everything I Do (I Do it for You)" and of course it became the biggest hit of 1991 which sent the message that instead of bangers, the public wanted sensitive new age guy from Bryan Adans even that shtick was bound to not work for Bon Jovi so in 1093 we got this wretched nonsense where Adams prostrates himself at this woman and it just gets incredibly creepy from there, dude the way you are carrying on is not the least bit attractive.

In cases like this, the woman at the centre of this song can and probably should do a lot better fpr herself while the rest of us shudder in disbelief at how gross and clingy this whole song is. Time to move on

Number Six

Yeah, that pass we gave Peter Andre for "Gimme A Little Sign" was short lived now, wasn't it?

"Funky Junky" by Peter Andre

You might all remember that I liked Peter Andre's cover of "Gimme A Little Sign" during "Good 1992 Vibrations" but this garbage completely erased any goodwill I had for this guy because, while the music is rather funky and probably would appeal in 2025 to someone like a Bruno Mars etc whenever pop music gets around to furiously masturbating over the nineties, there is just no way Peter Andre's tinny voice in the mix can sell it especially if his record company had it in their brains that he was going to be Australia's answer to Michael Jackson which is all sorts of wrong.

Then there's the lyrics that are the sort of cringe that even meme loving millennials and gen z today would avoid like the scrotal cancer they are. Next.

Number Five

And back we go to songs that are here because they truly sound atrocious...

"Jump Around" by House of Pain

Oh god, another song with the word 'jump' in the title that gives me a splitting headache every time I attempt to listen to it with the record scratching that sounds like a cat is literally scratching out the bottom of a litter box. somebody wheezing or that unholy sound of fingernails sliding down a chalkboard then again when the group's name is House of Pain, the fact that this song is so unpleasant to listen to makes an absurd amount of sense.

Also the rapping is delivered with the same enthusiasm as somebody lining up repeatedly to get kicked in the nuts, he sounds miserable, at least the ones yelling "jump around" sound enthusiastic. House of Pain, you can get on your pogo sticks and jump around to this audio torture but it's not for me.

Number Four

So three of my last four are cover songs...not shocking for me...but some of these are truly some of the most abysmal covers I have ever heard in my life and we start with one that might surprise some people

"You're So Vain" by Chocolate Starfish

Yeah, let's tackle a cover of Carly Simon's classic "You're So Vain" that was released by a band whose name is derived from slang for a poo covered arsehole which by the way could not be a more appropriate description of this cover version where there's none of the poise or anger that Simon showed when she was taking down a narcissist yet the lead singer's delivery sounds like that of a man who would be the narcissist and it just comes across as weird. 

The instrumentation is choppy and does nothing to back up the weak vocal performances. The reason why this is only at number four is...well...

Number Three

Remember how there were a whole bunch of songs that used nursery rhymes for their bad songs eg: Gayle and Leah Kate earlier in the 2020s? You might have to forgive them because in 1993, we got this....

"Three Little Pigs" by Green Jelly

Alright so Green Jelly were a 90s comedic punk rock band except unlike Weird Al Yankovic considerably less funny,,,take for their example this song which somehow became Green Jelly's biggest hit which turns children/s rhyme "Three Little Pigs": into the most grating  piece of so called grating piece of musical comedy I have ever heard. For one the vocal delivery is so camp and ridiculous that you can only laugh in bewilderment at how stupid it is especially for the pigs who all sound like they had to get on helium highs in order for them to sound that fucking squeaky.

This isn't funny, its just really badly done camp that continues to age badly.

Number Two

Turns out there's another one from the 1992 worst list here, welcome back UB40.

"I Can't Help Falling in Love With You" by UB40

This probably should be my number one, it is considered by many to be one of the worst hits of the 90s by people especially as it mangles one of Elvis Presley's most sincere and honestly beautiful love ballads with its pretty damn terrible soulless pop reggae that sounds like somebody was put plastic and styrofoam around his heart. Oh and Ali Campbell can't muster up anywhere near the emotion to sell this song or convince anyone that he is falling in love with them, you'd think in a song where he is confessing his love for this person that he'd sound genuinely emotional or lovestruck but there's nothing almost like any emotional has been botoxed away and replaced by this cardboard stiffness that permeates the whole track and makes it completely nauseating.

Sometimes the worst song of any given year stands out because the song is just a reprehensible entry in the pop culture of a given year or it just sounds like complete shit however in this case...the hatred becomes personal and hence we got a cover song that makes my blood run cold every time I hear it and thus...

Number One

"West End Girls" by East 17

The moment I heard this, I knew it would be my number one on this list if it made the ARIA  year end list for 1993 which it did so here we are, British boy band East 17 in their infinite wisdom decided to record a cover of Pet Shop Boys 1986 hit "West End Girls", a song that I have adored for years because of the passion and intensity that the Pet Shop Boys deliver the lyrics with, yet East 17 amp up a piano refrajn to repeat over and over  while numbly reciting the rap verses like the words originally written by Neil Tennant and Chris Lowe wrote were just instructions on how to put together IKEA furniture...like come on.

Then as if it coudln't get any worse, throw in the hip hop record scratch noises that are completely unnecessary and add absolutely nothing to the song. Fuck this trash, it's the worst hit song of 1993.

ARIA Singles Chart Review: 6th January. Don't Stop Believin' just Linger on that Notion and BMF

We're back in action for 2025 and the ARIA chart has reset post Christmas to something that actually kind of shows that not much changed during the week the Christmas music took over the charts because back at number one is "APT" by Rose and Bruno Mars granted this is riding the impact of the rerlease of her new album late last year but this still has solid enough sales and streaming to keep the number one spot ahead of the increasingly annoying "That's So True" by Gracie Abrams which has streaming but it's not enough to overtake "APT"

"Die With A Smile" by Bruno Mars and Lady Gaga is at number three thanks to having good sales but it's streaming isn't anywhere it needs to be to take the number one, it could start falling with stronger songs behind it.

"Birds of a Feather" by Billie Eilish hangs in at number four, it's in a pretty similar positon to "Die With a Smile' just with streaming a little steadier than sales. Another former chart topper "A Bar Song (Tipsy) by Shaboozey sits at number five and like other songs above it, looks to be on the downswing.

 

In what is shaping as the first truly big hit of 2025, "Messy" by Lola Young is at number six thanks to streraming and sales being decent, this has radio traction and should continue to stick around which is great to see because I like the song.

Now I would like to attribute the rest of this top ten down to people listen to end of 2024 end of year playlists of their most played songs because explains why "Beautiful Things" by Benson Boone continues to plague the top ten like the antibiotic resistant venereal diesease it is at number seven, "Espresso" by Sabrina Carpenter at number eight, "I Had Some Help" by Post Malone and Morgan Wallen at number nine and "Taste" by Sabrina Carpenter at number ten.

There's literally no point talking about losses and drop outs as there were no losses and all the drop outs were just Christmas music.

Gains

Let's go through the gains because there were songs that did stick around last week outside the current top ten but outside that so "Good Luck Babe!" by Chappell Roan rose from 45 to 11, "Sailor Song"  by Gigi Perez climbed from 42 to 12, "Lose Control" by Teddy Swims continues to not live up to its name on the charts by jumping from 44 to 13.

Re-Entries

The re entries make up over three quarters of the chart this week so I'm only going to cover the re entries of songs from last year not older songs that probably should be rissoled off the chart if ARIA had some actual recurrency rules in place.

Lets start backward with "I like the way you kiss me" by Artemas at 50, "Prada" by Casso, Raye and D-Block Europe at 49, "Scared to Start"  by Michael Marcagi at 45, "Guess" by Charli XCX feat. Billie Eilish at 44, "End of Beginning" by Djo at 43, "Bed Chem" by Sabrina Carpenter at 42 and "Ain't No Love in Oklahoma" by Luke Combs at 41

Then there's "Bad Dreams" by Teddy Swims at 39, "Wildflower" by Billie Eilish at 38, "Pink Skies" by Zach Bryan at 37, "Million  Dollar Baby" by Tommy Richman at 35, "Hot to Go!" by Chappell Roan to 33 and "Stumblin' In" by Cyril (really should include Suzi Quatro and Chris Norman...) at 30,

At 29 is "The Door" by Teddy Swims, "I Love You, I'm Sorry" by Gracie Abrams at 22, "Please Please Please" by Sabrina Carpenter at 21, "Stick Season" by Noah Kahan at 20, "Stargazing" by Myles Smith at 19,  "Too Sweet" by Hozier clocked back in at 17, "Timeless" by The Weeknd and Playboi Carti at 16, "Luther" by Kendrick Lamar (and SZA) at 15 and FINALLY "Austin" by Dasha at 14.

New Entries

Four new entries this week and quite unbelievably, we're starting off with...

47. "Don't Stop Believin'" by Journey

Yeah, I am floored I am covering this in 2025 but as it turns out that even with this song considered a classic of 80s even with all the overplay, it wasn't a hit in its original run in Australia in 1981/1982, peaking at number 100 on the Kent Music Report charts and since then has been recording increasingly larger peaks outside the top 50 over the years until 2025 was the year it broke into the top 50. 

I am not going to shit on the song because it is an absolute classic that I know a lot of people absolutely adore and it got more fans courtesy of it being covered by ?Glee" and for many the song is a bit of an anthem but its just not a song that I have a personal attachment to as the lyrics strike me as weird anda the hook doesn't do as much for me at all.

46. "Linger (Sirius XM Sessions)" by Royel Otis 

So are we only going to acknowledge Royel Otis exist when they cover somebody else's songs now are we? Come on, they  have "Velvet" and "FOAM" which are two great songs from "Pratts and Pains" which deserve to be hits but okay putting all that aside, how is this cover of The Cranberries hit "Linger"?

It's fine however I don't think it's anything that would make me switch from the wonderful original where Dolores Riordan (may she rest in peace) just delivers an incredible vocal performance where as the vocals on this cover just don't hit the mark for me but again I stress, this cover isn't the worst thing I have ever heard, it just more feels inessential from a duo whose own music is better thsn this cover.

Just saying.

27. "...BMF" by SZA

So this is the only song that charted from the deluxe edition of "SOS" which is a bit of a surprise, would have thought "30 for 30" with Kendrick Lamar would have charted but oh well, we did end up getting one of the better songs from it even as it interpolates "Girl From Ipanema" on the hook (SZA, you aren't being slick with that and you aren't getting away with it!) but it's actually done well, it sounds like a breezy summer pop song, I will say that the interpolation might see some people getting annoyed with it if it sticks around but I like it. Check this out.

18. "The Days (NOTION Remix" by Chrystal, Not

Well, this feels a somewhat random breakthrough. Chrystal is a British singer hailing from Manchester, her song "Waves" attracted attention from BBC 1Xtra which garnered her comparisons to Lily Allen with this remix from UK dance artist Notion and well I really don't care that much for Notion's remix of the song, it just feels too busy and Chrystal vocals already remind me way too much of Bebe Rexha in the most annoying way possible...nasal and all so no, this isn't particularly good.

That's our week and yeah..."BMF" by SZA just runs away with the best of the week. Worst is going to "The Days (Notion Remix" by Chrystal and Notion. 

All 4 1994: January 9th: All For A New Year

 Yes, after two years, the retro charts are back for 2025, this time we're checking out the ARIA singles charts of 1994 and after the mediocrity of 1993, I am looking forward to seeing what 1994 has to offer and for the first chart of the year we have a rather quiet one on hand.

Unfortunately we are not off to a good start in our top ten because "Please Forgive Me" by Bryan Adams maintains number one for another week, it had reasonable sales week to see off the challenge of "Boom! Shake the Room" by DJ Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince which is a shame because "Please Forgive Me" is putrid shlock (see my worst hit songs of 1993).

The top three wound up fairly stable with former chart topper Ace of Base remaining at number three with "All That She Wants".

Salt 'N' Pepa moved up one place to number four with "Shoop" (a song that is fine but not my thing). At number five is a new entry with Bryan Adams, Rod Stewart and Sting collaborating on "All For Love", we'll get to the quality of the song later but it's here thanks to decent sales and this being a reasonably big event collab.

Jimmy Barnes collab with The Badloves "The Weight" remains a signpost of stability at number six while Radiohead's "Creep creeps up one spot to number seven.

"Got to Get It" by Culture Beat slipped back to number eight and looks set to fall further as M People climbed three places to hit the top ten at number nine. Finally Mariah Carey's ballad "Hero stayed steady at number ten.

Losses

 Alright, lets start as usual with our losers and we had two songs that took big tumbles out of the top ten with Urban Cookie Collective's "The Key. The Secret" plunging from number four to number eleven but they have a new single on the rise which we will get to in a moment while "Dreams" by Gabrielle dipped from nine to fifteen.

"Lemon" by U2 slid seven places to twenty and Kim Wilde's cover of "If I Can't have You" dropped nine to thirty

Culture Beat were one of the biggest losers of the week as "Mr. Vain" stumbled from eighteen to thirty one while "Somewhere" by Efua slipped from twenty seven to thirty five.

Rick Price and Margaret Urlich's collab "Where is the Love" seems appropriate hecause it fell nine places to number forty while "If I Had No Loot" by Tony! Toni! Tone! akidded down eight places to number forty three.

Finally the biggest song of 1993 "I'd Do Anything For Love (But I Won't Do That)" by Meatloaf fell twenty slots to forty four and "Angels" by John Farnham fell from thirty six to forty nine.

Re Entries

Just the one return this week with 4 Non Blondes back at number 46 with "What's Up?". 

Gains

So the underwhelming collab between Elton John and Kiki Dee "True Love" got a solid boost up nine spots to thirty four. Even worse Michael Bolton's "Said I Loved You...But I Lied" got an eight place gain to thirty two

Twenty 4 Seven's "Slave to the Music" feat Stay-C and Nance got one of the biggest gains this week though as it rocketed from forty six to twenty eight while Urban Cookie Collective thundered up twenty places to twenty four with "Feels Like Heaven" and Cut 'N' Move's cover of "Give It Up" sure did a LOT of moving up as it rocketed from forty one to nineteen this week. 

New Entries

Just the two new entries this week, starting with...

41. "Been Loving You Too Long" by Diesel

Ahh because 1994 needs to start with a cover of an Otis Redding song somehow, yet, I think Diesel does a good job here? Not saying this is better than the original...nothing tops Otis Redding but I would take this cover over Michael Bolton caterwauling through "Sitting on the Dock of the Bay" mostly because gives this song a somewhat understated vibe and I really do like that, it doesn't top the original but I mean we're talking Otis Redding for crying out loud! Diesel still does a good job, this is worth checking out unlike

5. "All For Love" by Bryan Adams, Rod Stewart and Sting

Well okay. this is a collab that should be really good even with the questionable quality of Bryan Adams current number one hit but it does have Rod Stewart and Sting on it, it being for the "Three Musketeers" movie and all so law of averages says this should be at least good, right? 

Well no, this song is everything I dislike about adult contemporary music where it's just flaccid cliches that are eye roll worthy, you could swear that the earnest version of Bon Jovi wrote this song and what is worse is that nobody on the song sounds remotely good here. At least the instrunental has some redeeming value even if the lyrics are banally vomit inducing.

Yeah it's worst of the week by default as we only have two songs here. Diesel gets best of the week for "Been Loving You Too Long"

ARIA New Singles Entry Review: November/December 2024.

 Hi everyone, final one of these ARIA singles new entry reviews because I am going to go full steam back into the weekly charts and because November was kind of slow, I'm going to combine both November and December as per last year mostly due to neither month being all that busy for new entries so we'll see. 

November

"Noid" by Tyler, The Creator

Ahh, the first taste of Tyler, the Creator's excellent new album "Chromakopia" and while this isn;t the best song from the album, it is still really damn good with that incredible guitar sample and Tyler just owing the story telling with his protagonist St Chroma trapped by persistent feelings of paranoia and being  watched ike he is in the The Truman show. Good song on an even better album, go check out "Chromakopia" if you haven't already

"Disease" by Lady Gaga

So Lady Gaga has apparently begun the roll out for her seventh album with this being the lead off single for her new album in 2025 and I cannot be the only person who at first thought lyrically this was just "The Cure" part 2 except less believeable and with darker instrumentation? Tyhat was the thought that came to my head after several listens. Look, this is fine enough but its not going to stick around and for Lady Gaga, that's a problem.

"Sao Paulo" by The Weeknd feat. Anitta

So I've got some major concerns about this upcoming The Weeknd album, "Dancing in the Flames" was mediocre and "Timeless" feat. Playboi Carti continues to be one of the more pointless songs Abel has released. so what would we get with this third single? Well, we might be about to get one hell of a messy album because this is basically a Brazillian funk song that plays more to the strenghs of Anitta than The Weekndbwho does sound out of his depth here, Decent but not much more than that

"Bed Chem" by Sabrina Carpenter

So I decided to throw this song in as it is one of the songs from the Sabrina Carpenter album that has stuck around and I did want to talk ahout as I really enjoy rhis song! Yeah, it's a goofy sex song which the title barely conceals the sexual innuendo at play here but there's something I like about the way Sabrina delivers her vocals here, she's having fun with this and she's got the personality to sell a rather silly song like this

"2 Hands" by Tate McRae

Ugh, time to talk about the newest Tate McRae song and...I hear the instrumental appeal behind this, it;s got a decent tension to it that I would back somebody like Ariana Grande or somebody else in that lane to sell but Tate McRae just does not have the personality to pull this sort of song where she wants this dude to put his two hands on her. I am going to forget this song exists in record time.

"Bad Dreams" by Teddy Swims

Teddy Swims won me back with :"The Door"...a song that I think is damn great and you know what? This is also pretty damn great! It's got this really good groove that makes his biggest hit "Lose Control" look even more incredibly stiff if that was even possible. I love the near reggae groove this song has as Teddy Swims sings about this love that if he lost her it would be a bad dream for him. This is really cute...hope this winds up a hit.

Worst of the Month: "2 Hands" by Tate McRae

Honourable Mention: "Noid" by Tyler. The Creator

Best of the Month: "Bad Dreams" bv Teddy Swims and 'Bed Chem" by Sabrina Carpenter.

December

"Luther" by Kendrick Lamar feat. SZA

Um, how do I talk about one of my favourite songs of the year? Seriously this song is in contention for my top 50 favourite songs of 2024...that's how much I love this. Kendrick Lamar and SZA are just absolute magic together especially on a flipped sample of a Luther Vandross song. The song seems to be about the affects of untreated trauma and acting in ways that nught give themselves some temporary relief from the feelings of the untreated trauma, it's definitely a song that Kendrick seemed to have needed given it's high placement on the tracklist but it's still a god damn great song on "GNX"...an album that is one of Kendrick's best,

"Defying Gravity" by Cynthia Erivo and Ariana Grande

Kind of surprised we didn't get more songs from "Wicked: The Movie" show up here but I am glad this one did because yeah this is absolutely fantastic..there's not too many who can go toe for toe with Ariana Grande but Cynthia Erivo as Elphaba just absolutely puts in an incredble performance on this song. This song is worth checking out even if you don't care for "Wicked'

"Ma Meilleure Ennemie" by Stromae and Pomme

On the other side of the ledger is this song from the "Arcane" movie coming from Stromae who is apparently bigger in Europe and has better songs than this mess that sounds like it's going to age pretty terribly with that clunky production. Nope, this one is not for me in the slightest. I'll be moving on.

"Messy" by Lola Young. 

So I have known of Lola Young for awhile, she's a British singer/songwriter hailing from South East London who released a pretty good sophomore album this year with this song probably being one of the best songs from that album, it's an indie pop rock song about a relarionship where this guy can't be straight with her and he wants one thing while expecting the other, she's getting frustrated with him and it's making the relationship murky or as she describes messy. All up, I like this and I doubt I need to give much encouragement for this to be a hit because I suspect it's on the way there.

"Toxic Til the End" by Rose

So "APT" has really grown on me and I am loooking forward to writing about that song come list time in January but until then we've got this new one and yeah, I don;'t like this one as much unfortunately, its got all the hallmarks of being a Taylor Swift knock off and we're starting to see a few way too many try to rip off Taylor's sound without writing or even the music too match. I'd skip this one.

Wsorst of the Month: "Ma Meilleure Ennemie" by Stromae and Pomme

Best of the Month: "Luther" by Kendrick Lamar with SZA

ARIA Singles Top 50 Singles: New Entry Review. October

 "Timeless" by The Weeknd feat. Playboi Carti

So here's The Weeknd's follow up to "Dancing in the Flames" and...well, I am genuinely starting to have concerns about this new album of Abel's because this is one heck of a mess and the Playboi Carti feature does not help this song what's so ever although when has a Playboi Carti feature heped any song ever so it shouldn't be a surprised that his feature here is completely useless and adds so very little to the song. as per is Playboi Carti's whole shtick.

Even The Weeknd sounds somewhat flat on this trap rap slog, I am going forget this song in record time because this is not good at all.     

"Baby I'm Back" by The Kid Laroi

It's never a good sign when a song starts with a rather promiment sample of "Baby Come Back" by Player and it's a sample that Kid Laroi just cannot ride the sample even on the hook of this song when he is desperately trying to convince this girl that he is back and will stick around for her.

In short, Anthony Fantano aka The Needledtop on Youtube said it best "Stop remaking classic songs into shit songs" and yeah, he is right because this is fucking unnecessary

"Embrace It" by Ndotz

Oh god. Australia, we are not going to follow the USA's trend of enabling random rappers to chart, right?  Turns out Ndotz is a British rapper with Angolan heritage but Dave or Stormy this guy isn't because yeah, this guy's rapping sounds terrible with an even more annoying beat that's nothing more than a collection of beeping.

Oh and the content is nothing more than vapid rapping about women and vulgar sex references that don't make the song anywhere near close to attractive especially with that awful beat that would any woman off sexy time. In short, this is unnecessary and gross. Next!

"Sympathy Is A Knife" by Charli XCX feat. Ariana Grande

Last song from BRAT that I'll have to cover on the blog and yeah this is one that having heard the original I didn't care for all that much and this renix kind of makes this song worse especially as it becomes about whinging about the media attention Ariana's been getting etc. Not bad but definitely not good either.

"Thick Of It" by KSI feat. Trippie Redd

My time is better served by talking songs that are actually worth something not junk like this. Absolute garbage and Trippie Redd, you should know better.

"APT" by Rose feat. Bruno Mars

Well this is a pairing I wasn't at all expecting, a member of Blackpink teaming up with master of the throwback sound Bruno Mars who is fresh off the back of a collab with Lady Gaga and I have to say I am glad this song has had time to grow on me because when I first heard "APT" I was not a fan at all but it's grown on me in recent weeks mostly because I hear it on the radio A LOT and maybe a case of Stockholm Syndrome, yes the drums sound a little compressed and maybe overmixed but it wouldn't be a crime to deny just how fun and catchy this soug is and just how much a renix with Avril Lavigne would go off but as it is Bruno is just fine and this works as a 2000s throwback..check it out!

"Love Somebody" by Morgan Wallen

So look, I am going to say what I said about Morgan Wallen on Twitter a week or so ago. Wallen is a mediocre to awful artist who piggy backed to fame because people felt sorry for him over the 'n- word' scandal which is how the god awful "Last Night" became a thing and while he has one or two good to great songs, a lot of the singles he has released have absolutely sucked (see my worst hit songs of 2023 list) or been mediocre at best and "Love Somebody" falls into the latter camp of forgettable mediocre shlock to the point where if you had told me it was a Maroon 5 knock off I wouldn't question you! Ity just sounds so hollow and sterile ...blergh.

"That's So True" by Gracie Abrams

Speaking of mediocre, Gracie Abrams new single and I guess it's somewhat tolerable compared to previous efforts but again she isn't a unique voice or presence on the pop landscape and here because happened to get the Taylor Swift endorsement package like Sabrina Carpenter did but eh this song is fine enough, the hook is memorable enough...I guess.

Worst of the Month: "Thick of It" by KSI and Trippie Redd

Dishonourable Mention: "Embrace It" by Ndotz

Honourable MentIon: Nothing good enough to deserve this slot

Best of the Month: "APT" by Rose and Bruno Mars