The Top Ten Best Hit Songs of 2019

I always like making best hit songs lists of any given year, it’s fun to remember the songs you loved during a year and know that so many other people were also loving the same songs hence making them massive hits and honestly while 2019 did have some pretty dire stuff that I’ve already discussed in the Worst Hit Songs of 2019, it also had Taylor Swift making a solid to good album, the breakout success stories of Billie Eilish, Tones and I, Lil Nas X and rather belatedly Lizzo and you know what? All four artists produced some quality, hell three of the four artists I mentioned made this list.

A reminder that the songs on this list must have made the ARIA year end list for 2019 and 2018 and other past hit songs don’t count unless they ended up higher on the 2019 list than they did in 2018 or previously which rules out a song like "Bohemian Rhapsody"

First though a couple of shoutouts to songs that missed out so consider these my honourable mentions

•          “Choir” by Guy Sebastian
•          “Bad Guy” by Billie Eilish
•          “Dance Monkey” by Tones and I
•          “Never Seen the Rain” by Tones and I
•          “Shallow” by Lady Gaga and Bradley Cooper
•          “Wow” by Post Malone
•          “Sunflower” by Post Malone feat. Swae Lee
•          “Woke Up Late” by Drax Project feat. Hailee Steinfeld
•          “If I Can’t Have You” by Shawn Mendes
•          “Mess Her Up” by Amy Shark 
•      "Old Town Road" by Lil Nas X

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All good to great songs but just missed out because I simply couldn’t find room in my top ten for them so let’s get on with the list proper.

There’s a deep part of me frustrated that this song wasn’t the breakout global smash like it deserved to be for Tones and I but hey it made the year end of 2019 still so it is making this list.

10. “Johnny Run Away” by Tones and I

For as much as I liked “Dance Monkey”, it won’t be making the list proper as ridiculously catchy as it is, “Johnny Run Away” just connects for me so much better. The story of a young man opening up about his sexuality to his father at a young age and his father not being at all accepting of it and how the young man deals with being judged and the pain of being rejected by his father, his wider family and a world that while is growing to be more accepting of homosexuality, there’s still many that reject it for whatever reason, it’s actually heart breaking to listen to

This song is just a well crafted pop gem that tells a story very effectively and while it wasn’t the smash Tones and I’s next single was, this song deserves your attention all the same, check it out.

This next artist is making two appearances on this list and while this song has appeared at number one on several other best hits of 2019 lists, it’s only appearing at number nine here but it’s place on this list is so richly deserved.

9. “When the Party’s over” by Billie Eilish

You know, there hasn’t been an artist with this much intrigue over her music career as Billie Eilish in a while and this haunting sparse piano ballad about a toxic relationship that’s at the breaking point turned a lot of heads when it was released in 2018 as it should because “When the Party’s Over” is the sort of song with a self-aware framing where Billie knows she’s not good for this other person and often that loneliness that she’s feeling is better than being around that other person even if it blows to get to that point and she just wants the other person to let the relationship end and both move on with their lives.

It’s a bitter track but framed in a way that shows both Billie and this other person have done wrong and it’s time for both to part and move on with their lives. Great song.

I never imagined I’d be putting this next act on my best hits list of ANY YEAR but in 2019, he really improved to a point where four of his songs ended up on my most played of 2019 playlist on Spotify and while this wasn’t his big number one hit of 2019, this was the song that saw him get even bigger if that was possible...

8. “Circles” by Post Malone

2019 was the year I made an about face on Post Malone, I like “Sunflower” with Swae Lee, Young Thug’s verse on “Goodbyes” is the worst part of that song and “Wow” is so incredibly stupid it comes together well but “Circles” is the song of his hits this year that blew me away, mainly because it was a step away from the trap sound into a more chill brand of pop rock music that instrumentally was so chill yet Post Malone is frustrated that he and this girl are still doing the same thing over and over again and he wants her to make up her mind and make a decision instead of sending them both around in circles, it’s a good song and the fact it’s still in the top ten at the end of February is testament to that.

Speaking of artists who in the recent past probably would have been more likely to make my worst list…come on down, Taylor Swift.

7. “Lover” by Taylor Swift

The title track from Taylor Swift’s surprisingly good album “Lover” is not the best song from it, hell, “The Archer” and “Paper Rings” are better but given Taylor chose “Me!” with Brendon Urie and “You Need to Calm Down” (the latter would have  been a dishonourable mention on my worst list if I’d done dishonourable mentions) as singles and make “The Archer” a promotional single, “Lover” was the song that stood out mostly because it’s a very intimate song where Taylor is deeply in love wanting to go wherever her new beau goes, its actually a sweet love song and I am glad it made the ARIA Year end list,

Empowerment songs are generally mediocre, they tend to only work if the person singing as a powerful and passionate voice and genuinely believes what they are attempting to sell to the public, when they don’t work, they sound tinny, whiny and kind of conceited. Not the case for this though…

6. “Good as Hell” by Lizzo

So 2019 saw me come to grips with the fact that try as I might, Lizzo is not my cup of tea, “Truth Hurts” frequently reminds me of Khalid’s “Young, Dumb and Broke” and really its not a great song and  Lizzo is an artist really does give a LOT of personality in her songs and she can be very in your face however I think that kind of confident persona is something that works so well on “Good As Hell”, she’s this breezy, confident person who can sell this sort of self-empowerment song.

The song’s message pretty boils down to not letting the world’s or your own problems get you down and trying, it’s quite the fitting song for Lizzo given she has been recording and releasing albums for years but older songs like “Truth Hurts” and now “Good as Hell” and the remix with Ariana Grande is probably better than the original given it gives us a brief break from the very in your face personality of Lizzo. Great song!

So the top five on this list are unchanged from the mid year list although I may have changed the ranking, this song nearly fell out of my top five owing to how shallow it is but…

5. “Sweet But Psycho” by Ava Max

Honestly, this song is your definition of shallow pop music but there’s a place in pop for this kind of song and Ava Max does it well, The framing is about both people involved are completely into it, they both want it especially as he is just as crazy as she is. Granted I am not sure how much of a good thing sampling “Down” by Jay Sean will do for Ava Max’s career, she’s not really had a second hit despite releasing multiple singles.

Also to those trying to take “Sweet But Psycho” seriously, stop, take a cold shower and move on, it’s not designed to be even vaguely serious, it’s just an absurd, ridiculously fun pop song, remember when pop music was FUN? ‘Sweet But Psycho” gets sillier the more you think about it and you know what? That’s okay.

This was Miley’s best performance in 2019…

4. “Nothing Breaks Like A Heart” by Mark Ronson and Miley Cyrus

2019 was a weird one for Miley, she released an EP which everybody forgot about a good two months after, a stand alone single called “Slide Away” which while not being bad, it wasn’t great and she also collaborated with Mark Ronson for “Nothing Breaks Like A Heart” a wonderful tasteful slice of EDM crossed with pop and country that, unlike Marshmello’s horrendous “One Thing Right” with Kane Brown, nailed this song damn near perfectly.

For one thing, Miley sounds so damn good on this song, the day she wakes up and realizes her voice is perfect for country or country adjacent music is going to be a wonderful day and Mark Ronson knows how to put together production that suits the vocalist involved, its genuinely impressive, in terms of EDM, Ronson is definitely out in front. Great job!

This is the second and last time she will appear on this list, if anything was clear from music in 2019, Billie Eilish is here to stay.

3. “Bury A friend” by Billie Eilish

It’s amazing this song was even a hit to begin with it’s industrial sound, it’s not anything close to being your conventional pop song yet in 2019, “Bury A friend” was a hit signifying that the Australian public has a whole are ready for songs that sink into a darker and more twisted subject matter, Billie is able to warp and twist the subject matter of this monster talking to her from underneath her bed as she seems more scared of real life terrors rather than whatever is lurking beneath her bed. It’s an incredibly catchy but low key song that emphasises how well Billie can capture an audience. If anything, “Bury A Friend” is the song that made it clear that Billie Eilish is a star and she is sticking around and for mainstream music, that’s a good thing.

So in an era where hip hop has mostly seemed bland and lifeless, this song particularly in early 2019 provided a reminder of how much fun hip hop can be,

2. “Leave Mr Lonely” by Hilltop Hoods.

Yes, this is my favourite Australian hit of the year, a song with a sublime guitar sample to start the song. MC Suffa told Triple J the song is about the struggle of being cornered into a conversation with a close talker who is talking a lot of rubbish and being just tired enough of it to snap hence the line lines “Loser, I won’t dress it up. Me and my friends, we are not here for your BS” which is a line that should be engraved into Australian culture already.

It’s just a fun song that should have been huge around the world given it completely steers away from the dreary trap slog that the US hip hop scene finds itself in and I find incredibly monotonous so yeah “Leave Me Lonely” is a slice of Aussie hip hop that the rest of the world should have cottoned onto in 2019 but hey given its success in Australia, I’m happy and deserves to be this high on this list.

I think my number one pick was almost set in stone by March 2019, I was deeply in love with this smooth coolness of this song and it struck a chord for me that no other song in 2019 matched because for as much as I love “Leave Me Lonely” and “Bury A Friend”, neither quite hit for me like this did…

1.       1. "Dancing with A Stranger” by Sam Smith and Normani

So yeah I know, this song is light weight Emotional Oranges and its easy to see the parallels between this song and Normani’s hit with Khalid “Love Lies’ from 2018 but unlike “Love Lies”, “Dancing with a Stranger” is a melancholy song where Sam Smith and Normani are seeking to move on from a past relationship and find some relief from their melancholy with a dance.

Musically, “Dancing With a Stranger” owes a lot of it’s sound to 80s R’n’B but my god it does it well especially at achieving the cool not wanting to be lonely sound that the song’s subject matter deals with and hell the watery textures work better here than they did on “Without Me” by Halsey plus Sam Smith sounds great over a song like this, I can only hope his upcoming album has more tracks like this one and Normani is the perfect choice for the collab as they work so damn well together.

“Dancing With A Stranger” the best hit song of 2019.

2000 Sound: 27th February: Bloke hits the Pure Shores of number 1

So this week is quieter but we still have some big stories mostly centred around our top ten where there's yet another new number one and a new entry that debuted in the top 5 so let's get to that new number one which is somehow..."Bloke" by Chris Franklin...yeah the comedy song snags number one on the back of an extraordinary sales week.

Killing Heidi remain at number two with their former chart topper "Mascara" while last week's number one "I Try" by Macy Gray dropped two places to number three.

Stability kings and queens S Club 7 maintained their hold on number four with "S Club Party".

There's new entry for UK girl group All Saints with "Pure Shores" in at number five. This song is likely to be big, folks, it pushed Len's "Steal My Sunshine" back to number six

Eiffel 65 hit the top ten with their follow up single "Move Your Body" rising four places to number seven forcing both Vanessa Amorosi's "Absolutely Everybody" and Boundhound Gang's "The Bad Touch" back two places to eight and nine respectively

Finally Christina Aguilera's "What A Girl Wants" dropped one place to number ten.

Gains

Some big gains across the board this week with American punk band Blink 182 up from 35 to 21 with "All the Small Things" while Backstreet Boys are up 12 places to 20 with "Show Me the Meaning of Being Lonely"

Shania Twain's "Don't Be Stupid (You Know I Love You)" bounced up nine places to 32.

Taxiride's "Can You Feel?" is being felt by people as it rose ten places to 35.

Re-Entries

We have three re-entries with the best of them being Britney Spears "From the Bottom of My Broken Heart" at 37.

Robbie Williams "Angels" is back at 40 while Filter's "Take A Picture makes its return at 41.

Losers

"Will 2K" by Will Smith took a hard plunge from 28 to 43 this week as did another former top ten hit "Waiting for Tonight" by Jennifer Lopez which fell from 33 to 35.

Sister2Sister's "Sister" fell 11 places to 48 as did Moby's "Why Does My Heart Feel So Bad?" as it hit 50

28 Days "Here We Go" dropped ten places to 31 while "Smooth" by Santana and Rob Thomas dropped nine places to 36.

New Entries

All Saints snagged highest debut of the week with "Pure Shores" in at number five.

The only other new entry comes from Vengaboys with "Kiss (When the Sun Don't Shine)" in at number 17.

ARIA Singles Top Ten/Chart Review: 24th February. Not so Blinded by Bieber

So this week felt weird especially as this week actually felt like a pretty normal week especially as Justin Bieber's album impact felt muted, it did impact the chart especially in the top ten but he only got one new song among the six new entries this week, kind of telling about what the general public thinks about "Changes" as a whole really however it wasn't just Bieber who made an impact on the top ten so let's get to that, shall we?

The Weeknd spends a fifth week at number one with "Blinding Lights" and right now I'm not seeing what challenges it. "Don't Start Now" by Dua Lipa remains at number two but its falling back on streaming and sales, it could get overtaken by "Intentions" by Justin Bieber feat. Quavo which unfortunately netted a ten place gain to hit number three but its sales and streaming are pretty good...let's hope that changes because its less of a love song to a woman but an ode to loving doing property taxes.

Billie Eilish snagged the highest debut of the week with her James Bond theme "No Time to Die" in at number four and I really don't expect this to stick around in the top ten even though it is excellent.

All of this was enough to push "Dance Monkey" by Tones and I back to number five as it gracefully begins its exit from the top ten, its bleeding sales and streams right now.

Also really suffering is "The Box":by Roddy Rich where sales just aren't matching the massive streaming.
give
Halsey's "You Should be Sad" dropped two places to number seven as it lost sales and streaming this week which is a little disappointing as this is one of her best singles to date (that might change if "3am" becomes a single, just saying)

Justin Bieber comes up again at number eight with "Yummy" making the biggest gain of the week to return to the top ten. This won't last thankfully, will be gone next week.

Lewis Capaldi falls one spot to number nine with "Before You Go", this should rise next week when the Bieber songs collapse.

Finally "Circles" by Post Malone drops three places to number ten.

Gains

The biggest gainer of the week was Justin Bieber's "Yummy" as I have already talked about getting an eleven place boost to number eight.

Doja Cat's "Say So" rose from 34 to 28...I do not understand the appeal of that song at all.

Losers

Weirdly enough the biggest loser was "10,000 Hours" by Dan and Shay feat. Justin Bieber as it fell 12 places to 49. Would have thought the Justin Bieber association might give it a rise or keep it stable this week,

"South of the Border" by Ed Sheeran feat. Camila Cabello and Cardi slumped 7 places to 47 while most pleasingly "One Thing Right" by Marshmello and Kane Brown plunged 7 spots to 50. Good riddance.

Onefour's "Welcome to Prison" couldn't take advantage of their big debut last week dropping nine places to 42.

Selena Gomez's "Rare" plummeted six to 38 while "Godzilla" by Eminem feat. Juice WRLD fell out of the top ten to 13.

Drop Outs

Two big 2019 drop outs in this category with "Highest in the Room" and "Lose You to Love Me"by Selena Gomez both gone taking with them "German" by No Money Enterprise and "Turn Me On" by Riton feat. Oliver Heldens and Vula.

I am not going to complain that "The Reaper" by The Chainsmokers feat. Amy Shark is gone because that song is just...yikes however I am disappointed but not surprised that "Run" by Joji is gone, it's a good song and deserves to be a hit especially as the ARIA top 50  singles chart has been looking reasonably good so far this with good songs hitting the top ten.

New Entries

So what else hit the chart this week besides "No Time to Die" by Billie Eilish at number four?

Well the only new Justin Bieber song to hit the chart within the top 50 was "Forever" feat. Post Malone and Clever at 29 which might say something about how lazy and cheap "Changes":is as an album.

Sam Smith arrives at 32 with the title track of his upcoming album called "To Die For".,A pretty mid tempo ballad that I kind of like tbh.

American group Surfaces have their first ARIA charting song with "Sunday Best" in at 36. Not at all a fan of this song so I hope it's not a hit.

Saint Jhn is in at 41 with "Roses", a song that's already top ten in the UK. Will it do the same in the Australia.

Finally after enormous radio push "Maniac" by Conan Gray is into the top 50 at 45 securing Gray his first song in the ARIA top 50.

So I am not expecting many BTS songs to hit the chart, we might get "On" but that's about it, we'll see what happens when the chart is updated on Saturday at 5pm AEDT

ARIA Singles Top Ten/Chart Review: 17th February

This week may not mean much given the shake up that may come next week either courtesy of FireFight Australia concert (look at the current Australian iTunes chart...it's a mess) or (what might well be pretty unlikely given data) Justin Bieber album bomb thanks to "Changes" plus Billie Eilish released her James Bond theme called "No Time to Die" so next week could get pretty messy.

Anyway that's next week, we need to look at this week where it's a fourth week at number one for "Blinding Lights" by The Weeknd and honestly this song is dominant across the board on both streaming and digital sales.

It held on comfortably from Dua Lipa's "Don't Start now which remained at number two as it wasn't able to bridge the gap to "Blinding Lights" on either streaming or digital sales but it remained ahead of "Dance Monkey" by Tones and I which is stuck at number 3 In"The Box" by Roddy Ricch which is glued to number four (those sales numbers need to improve if it's to make a play at number one)

The biggest surprise of the week was Halsey's "You Should be Sad" jumping three places to number 5. I don't expect this song to stay in the top 5 not with Billie Eilish likely to debut top 5 however it pushed past "Godzilla" by Eminem and Juice WRLD down to number 6..

"Circles" by Post Malone continues to go nowhere and remains at number 7,

Sadly, the worst song in the top ten also went up one this week that being "Before You Go" by Lewis Capaldi at number eight, he managed to make "Someone You Loved" even worse at the Brit awards by claiming it was about his GRANDMOTHER...yikes.

Billie Eilish jumped one place to number nine while Tones and I's "Never Seen the Rain" jumped one place to number 10.

Gains

Quite surprisingly "Live in Life" by The Rubens jumped from 46 to 35 this week, this song has some traction so I guess we'll see what happens.

"Say So" by Doja Cat rose nine places to 34.


Losers

We had quite a few losers this week with the biggest being "One Thing Right" by Marshmello and Kane Brown finally on it's way out falling eleven places to 43.

Another 2019 hit finally on the way out is "Senorita" by Shawn Mendes and Camila Cabello which fell from 39 to 46 while "South of the Border" by Ed Sheeran, feat. Cabello and Cardi B dropped seven places to 40.

"Turn Me On" by Riton feat. Oliver Heldens and Vula dropped ten places to 50 while "Highest in the Room" by Travis Scott dropped to 41 from 34.

Drop Outs

Two big drop outs with the pretty good "Piece of Your Heart" by Meduza and Goodboys gone after 36 weeks on the chart however it's good riddance to the worst hit song of 2019 "Hot Girl Bummer" by Blackbear.
"Watermelon Sugar" by Harry Styles is also gone taking "Eleven" by Khalid and "Only the Young" by Taylor Swift with it.

New Entries

Justin Bieber has the highest new entry of the week with "Intentions" feat. Quavo at 13 and giving it's doing well on sales and streaming expect this to go top ten next week. Joy (sarcasm).

Khalid and Disclosure are back with a new song called "Know Your Worth" in at 31 while OneFour are in at 33 with "Welcome to Prison"

In perhaps the best news of the week and by a mile the best new song of the five here, "Run" by Joji is in at 39, I don't expect this song to stick around but it'd be fantastic if it did and  became a hit.

Finally Ali Gatie's follow up single "What If I Told You That I Love You" debuts at 49 despite being not much better than background noise.

Anyway I am not sure what we are going to get next week other than the chart being a mess but The Weeknd should keep number one for a fifth week, we'll have to wait til Saturday at 5pm AEDT to find out.

2000s Sound: 20th February: "I Try" retakes number one as the chart is hit by an influx of new entries

We have a wild week in the top ten this week. A new entry debuting in the top ten, one of last week's debuts rising into the top ten but more importantly a change at number one so let's get right down to it.

The change at number one is that former number one "I Try" by Macy Gray has re-taken the top sport after a surprisingly strong sales week which pushed  "Mascara" by Killing Heidi down to number two as sales began to fall off.

What might be the big threat is the big mover and the first of three songs either into the top ten or debuting in the top ten this week with "Bloke" by Chris Franklin rising twelve places to number three. This novelty song has a serious shot at number one sadly.

S Club 7 remained not bothered as "S Club Party" kept going for another week at number four.

Len had a bit of their sunshine taken by Chris Franklin as "Steal My Sunshine" dropped two places to number five.

Vanessa Amorosi's "Absolutely Everybody" remains at number six while Bloodhound Gang got a very bad touch that "The Bad Touch" move down two places to number seven.

Tina Cousins has been praying for this moment as "Pray" rose four places to be the second of the songs into the top ten at number eight.

Christina Aguilera's 'What a Girl Wants" drops two places to number nine while there's a new entry by an eighteen year old American, Jessica Simpson with her single "I Wanna Love You Forever" arriving at number ten and landing highest debut of the week.

Gains

Some fairly limited gains this week with the biggest being for "Bloke" by Chris Franklin up twelve to number 3 as I have already mentioned.

Marc Anthony's "I Need to Know" is up from 32 to 25 this week but that's about it.

Losers

There were some big losers right across the board this week, let's begin at number 28 where we find Will Smith's "Will 2K" after a ten place drop this week.

"Waiting for Tonight" by Jennifer Lopez collapsed 13 places to 33. William Orbit's "Adagio for Strings" slumped 11 places to 34.

Deadstar's "Deeper Water" literally takes a deep plunge on the chart by dropping ten places to 38 while Aleesha Rome is still searching for heaven having dropped nine to 37 with "Search My Heaven". Cwline Dion's "That's the Way it is' dropped nine places to 43.

Cliff Richard's "The Millennium Prayer" had the biggest fall of the week dropping 16 places to 46 and finally TLC's "Dear Lie" dropped nine places to 47.

New Entries

We have an incredibly large number of new entries this week, I already mentioned Jessica Simpson at number ten with "I Wanna Love You forever" however another American blonde pop music youngster Mandy Moore has entered the chart at 16 with the rather catchy "Candy"

Hong Kong born American singer songwriter Coco Lee has her first ARIA chart entry with "Do You Want My Love" at number 20 while punk band 28 Days have the highest debuting Australian entry with "Here We Go at 21"

Oasis declare "Go Let It Out" in at 23.

Country superstar Shania T%wain is back with "Don't Be Stupid (You Know I Love You)" and it's bowed at 41 while Deni Hines arrives at 42 with "Pull Up to the Bumper"

Taxiride are wondering "Can You Feel" at number 45.

Rising American R 'n' B group Destiny's Child enter at 48 with "Say My Name"/

Finally Shaft are in at 50 with "(Mucho Mambo) Sway'

Review: "Changes" by Justin Bieber..

It’s been five years since American popstar Justin Bieber dropped his album “Purpose” which saw Bieber hit the heights of his fame with songs “Love Yourself” hitting number one on the ARIA single charts however Bieber ended up cancelling a world tour citing a need to take a break before suffering addiction and then getting married to his now wife Hailey Baldwin so I thought that there was a big chance that “Changes” could be an interesting listen especially if Justin could channel everything he has been through and drilled into his emotions around events in his life to make an interesting and somewhat fascinating album and given that Justin Bieber was pursuing an R’n’B vibe, I was curious so was “Changes” as interesting as I had hoped?

Well no, we didn’t get anything close to an interesting album sonically or especially lyrically as it seems like Justin Bieber and the bevy of songwriters and producers which included Timbaland, Poo Bear, Ski Mask the Slump God, Travis Scott and Post Malone weren’t interested in making an interesting and diverse album where Justin Bieber opens up about his life, they were more interested in creating an album that’s bereft of effort and sounds like a modern day Chris Brown album without the god damn auto tune plus the same grossness and underlying toxicness of a modern Chris Brown album.

When I say bereft of effort, the lack of effort begins with the sound of this album which basically takes all the bad elements of music from the 2010s and turns a majority this album into a generic slurry of tired trap and pop tropes straight out of the mid to 2010s, “Changes” is nowhere near close to being R’n’B because I will not sit here and believe that this lifeless, passionless, devoid of creativity and lack of energy is supposed to be rhythm and blues music, in my experience with R’n’B listening to the likes of Jhene Aiko or even Usher’s best album back in the day, they had passion, energy, soul and the music while not always perfect showed vision, creativity and a direction/purpose, I can’t say that any of that for “Changes”. Sound wise this album is boring by the time I’d heard “Available”, I was wondering why I was torturing myself.

Every single song bar the last few songs sound the same with the same sounding trap with hints of bass guitar and the occasional synth that fits with nothing on the song for good measure, Bieber is basically doing the Chris Brown meets Drake sound from the mid-2010s in 2020 although it’s not surprising considering how much Bieber has come to Brown’s defence calling him a legend and ‘king of R’n’B and collaborated with Brown to horrendous results.

The last few songs on this album are basically Bieber and an acoustic guitar but they also run together and start feeling like they sound the god damn same, there’s nothing positive to be said about the instrumentation on this thing.

As for the lyrics, I don’t expect Justin Bieber to write music akin to that of a Father John Misty or anyone else but my god, these  lyrics have no emotional depth or pathos to them and follow a very set structure except when there is a collaborator involved on the song, a song like the album’s title track “Changes” where Bieber sings about some days he might push further or not in the verses but then in the chorus sings “I’m goin’ through changes (x3)..Doesn’t mean I’ll change” so if you are going through changes but not willing to make the changes doesn’t mean you are changing at all, Justin, he also doesn’t outline how he is going to change or what changes he has actually made to be a better husband to his wife although when you look at who was behind the song writing, it’s not surprising it’s a clusterfuck given Nasri Atweh was behind Magic’s 2014 hit “Rude!” and Poo Bear recently worked on the cacophonous disaster that was the last Zac Brown band album.

Also if you are expecting a good hook, you are in hard luck, most of the hooks are these repetitive lazily written things that go nowhere close to being memorable except for “Yummy” which I have already talked about at length. 

The lyrical gangbang continues, on “Available” which could be interpreted as this relationship being abusive because Bieber is complaining that she is busy and that she belongs in his bed, you know not working or providing for Bieber so he can live his lifestyle but she should just stay in bed all day as though that is going to pay the bills or pay for groceries etc, there’s this clinginess that infects this song and makes it icky to say the least, this is also the same thing that pervades on “E.T.A” where Bieber is desperate for her to get home or give him her estimated time of arrival presumably so she and him can go to bed, there’s just something borderline abusive about the writing of some of these songs.

Then there’s the most recent single with Quavo (we’ll get to the collaborators on this thing in a moment), “Intentions” where Bieber sings “Heart full of equity, you’re an asset” which could be very much misinterpreted as this girl being Bieber’s property! Also “Stay in the kitchen, cookin’ up, got your own bread”. Hey Justin, it’s 2020, men can make bread to, the kitchen isn’t a space confined to just a woman! The whole song is just cringey and raises a lot of red flags. It’s almost sad that Quavo’s verse while not great is the best part of the song.

So let’s deal with the collaborations, Post Malone’s verse while his worst since “Stoney” is delivered with a passion that doesn’t match anything else on “Forever”, Kehlani is just about the best thing on “Get Me”, Travis Scott clearly decided he was just having an off day and phoned it in on “Second Emotion” and as for Lil Dicky on “Running Over”? Like anyone would expect good quality from Lil Dicky, he slips a basketball reference in all before telling this girl he’ll kiss her breasts all tenderly…ewww.

This album does not deserve the most generic of passes, music has evolved and changed from the sounds that were popular in 2015/16 when Justin released Purpose which at least had a pulse, some passion and creativity behind it, you could at least appreciate songs like “Sorry” and “Love Yourself”, we are moving beyond the trap sound especially as you look at what is ruling iTunes right now, this album is a lazy, generic, slapdash slog that is actually an insult to background noise, don’t punish your friends and family with this, play “Purpose” or even Usher’s albums, they are load better than this and those reviews you Beliebers are reading and most likely pissed at? Those reviews likely had more effort put into them than Justin Bieber or anyone associated with this album put into the writing and recording of it. 

Changes gets a very light 3/10

The Top Ten Worst Hit Songs of 2019

We have reached the end of 2019, so it is time to discuss the hit songs that actively pissed me off during this year. 2019 is a difficult year to find the absolute worst in popular music mostly because a lot of it while not great was pretty good and others relatively inoffensive that I was just ambivalent toward, I really enjoyed this year music wise, however it also meant the absolutely terrible hit songs stuck out like sore thumbs and need to their rotting fleshy carcasses dealt with however I will say I am not as angry toward some of these as they aren’t worth the hatred as there was MUCH worse that didn’t chart (looking at you Liam Payne, Zac Brown Band and AJR)

My rules for this list are simple, the songs must have made their debut on the year end list for 2019 to be considered, overplayed on the radio cannot be a factor for making this list, a song has to actively piss me off with its content or the actual music to make it

.

Also I have decided to introduce a new rule, if a song that made the 2018 year end list hits the 2019 year end list higher then that’s eligible for this list too.

Let’s get this show started with a song I am certain I am the only person that changed the station when it came on the radio because I was so tired of it

10. I’m So Tired” by Lauv and Troye Sivan

I loved Troye Sivan’s 2018 album “Bloom” however this song just drives me up the wall every single god damn time I hear it, it’s a song where Lauv and Sivan complain that they are “so tired of love songs” that they just want to go home and how sick they are of people falling in love to their song. Seriously? If a song makes that connection for somebody to falling in love that’s honestly a great thing. The second verse goes through how clingy this guy is, there’s a vague element of creepy here and that shines through in the production with its minimalist and uninteresting close to trap music sound that by the way is so played out in modern music.

If you can get past how creepy the vocals and the production is on this song than good for you…I guess but I can’t…this song blows…time to move on…

This next song is from a group that really disappointed me in 2019, this band released a song earlier in the decade that might just make my top ten best hit songs of the decade, but I can’t lie when they disappointed me, they disappointed me hard and boy did they disappoint in 2019

9. “Rescue Me” by OneRepublic

It’s hard to believe OneRepublic have gone from pop rock anthems like “Counting Stars” and “Love Runs Out” to “Rescue Me” mostly because both “Counting Stars” and “Love Runs Out” sees OneRepublic front man Ryan Tedder exude some charisma and genuine personality on both songs that make them infectious and danceable however “Rescue Me”  can’t enter the pantheon  Tedder sounds monotonous and lacking any sort of fire or passion on the hook and as for the production, the instrumentation sounds like its trying to connect three or four different songs, it just doesn’t work at all and this was another instant radio station changer when this come on, it’s a painfully tired song and OneRepublic are capable of so much better.

Speaking of capable of so much better, two genuine pop music popstars get together for a collaboration and come up with this?

8. “I Don’t Care” by Ed Sheeran and Justin Bieber

It ought to be a crime to have Ed Sheeran and Justin Bieber on a song together and neither of them show more personality or charisma than a cake of soap and much like Ryan Tedder on “Rescue Me”, they sound like they would rather be anywhere else than dancing with their baby, these two sound like they are having as much fun as a couple of kids in detention writing “I must not sing “Yummy” during maths”

Also not helping is the production lacking any kind of groove or energy. The only energy about this song is what sounds like a monkey jacked up on sleeping pills and Red Bull.

Given what Justin Bieber has released this year so far, its safe to say he will be on this list again not that he’d care all that much.

So after “Meant to Be” in 2018, country and pop combining continued to be a thing with Dan and Shay’s “10,000 Hours” feat. Justin Bieber which while boringly nauseating didn’t make my blood run cold however I can’t say the same for this EDM-country mess, Marshmello, PLEASE EXPLAIN?

7. “One Thing Right” by Marshmello feat. Kane Brown

After the “Meant to Be” clusterfuck of 2018, I would have thought pop and country would have learned that this kind of thing has more chance of sounding terrible than any good but EDM producer Marshmello not getting the message with this attempt at EDM country ‘rock’ with that awful squealing guitar during the breakdown that just sends a cold chill down my back and my teeth on edge every time I hear it.

The production means Kane Brown has to deliver the lyrics in this flat monotone not that it really matters because the lyrics are the 2019 version of Hoobastank’s “The Reason” with all the sickening subtext as well, if you’ve cheated on and lied to her, Kane, why the hell is she sticking around? She should have packed up and left you ages ago.

This song got played over any number of women in country and independent artists on US country radio and added to the unnecessary maligning of country music as a whole.

Marshmello can go away any time he likes as far as I am concerned.

So my thoughts on this band in recent days have been overwhelmingly positive in light of the release of their most recent single on Thursday so in order to figure out why they are making this list, you have to go back to the first single from this upcoming album…

6. “Easier” by 5 Seconds of Summer

My anger at this song is kind of diluted by the fact that “Teeth” was pretty good and their new single “No Shame” is excellent however it makes “Easier” a massive disappointment because there was so much potential to this song instead the production sounds like the three producers on this track Louis Bell, Andrew Watt, andCharlie Puth intermixed four sounds into one and it sounds TERRIBLE.

Luke’s falsetto on this song is ear grating, granted it’s much better on “No Shame” but that doesn’t excuse how awful “Easier” is on the ear which draws attention to the lyrics which draw into this toxic relationship where he doesn’t want to find out the answer if its easier to stay or go because this girl is beautiful…a girl being beautiful is NOT a good enough reason to stay in a bad relationship, this is the sort of relationship that sinks toward being in emotionally abusive territory. Definitely not a good song,

Look, this next guy has been a plague on the music scene for the entirety of the 2010s and what is worse some people want to crown this person as a king of R’n’B despite many of his albums during the past decade being bloated atrocities yet somehow this over rated and overtly decorated clown still somehow has a music career,

5. “No Guidance” by Chris Brown and Drake

So somehow everyone, who in recent days has been lining up to give Justin Bieber a pass for a generic plague dispenser of a lazy, slapdash album which they shouldn’t. has declared Chris Brown a legend and wanting to bestow some kind of “king of ‘r’n’b’ crown, two titles that he does not deserve as his songs are mostly drizzled with autotune or absolutely gross eg: 2017 single “No Privacy” or his 2018 hit with “rapper” Lil Dicky “Freaky Friday” (which should have made my worst list in 2018). This song is an absolute slog to sit through with its bland beat as Brown continues to show his terrible attitude toward women by gaslighting young women into having sex with him. Ew.

What is not much better is there’s no chemistry or interesting word play by either Drake or Brown has they sloppily try to hook up with a girl through layers of autotune. Chris Brown is no king of R’n’B and Drake will most likely continue to be the most over exposed music star in the world next to Ariana Grande (we’ll get to her) while inspiring Justin Bieber to shit out mediocrity

Oh boy…this song has been piled on by plenty of people and originally, I wasn’t one of them however with the passing of time I have realized my mistake and that Lewis Capaldi was committing crimes against good music.

4. “Someone You Loved” by Lewis Capaldi

Here we have the most overwrought song to become a hit since Whitney Houston’s ghastly cover of “I Will Always Love You” (have to slaughter one sacred cow) but unlike Whitney Houston, Lewis Capaldi sounds like he is just perpetually in pain after one too many kicks to the scrotum while on a bender which makes “Somebody Like You” intolerable at least from a vocal standpoint, the only saving grace for Capaldi is that at least he has more charisma than Justin Bieber.

This song is toxic in the worst way possible, it only reinforces what this girl did without any balance to indicate why she maybe did what she did to end the relationship and the song just comes off sounding like Capaldi whining over this really dreary piano. Yeah, I might have liked this song when it first came out but yeah repeated listens to it on the radio soured me on this toxic, whiny mess in no time at all and if “Before You Go” makes the year end for 2020, we might well be talking about Capaldi again. Joy.

So let’s get to a regular on a year-end worst list…Halsey. Now much like 5 Seconds of Summer, she has released a decent song off her new album “Manic” as her new single and it is currently sitting in the top 5 but if you all remember, in 2019, she released this…

3. “Without Me” by Halsey

This song was never going to top this list but oh boy, this song has so many issues, it’s hard to know where to begin, the production is this watery mess that’s not got enough gravitas to carry any of the melodrama that Halsey is trying to sell with all the enthusiasm of a seven year old child trying to avoid hugging that uncle who smells of cigarettes and stale farts.

The content of the song though is the reason that this song is so high up on this list where Halsey claims she was the one who carried presumably G-Eazy to the top which I doubt considering he was doing well on the charts before those two started dating, it’s got this veneer of ego and lack of self-awareness that makes this song frankly really toxic and paints Halsey in a pretty ordinary light. I have no use for this song.

Now we get to somebody I never imagined I would be putting on a year end worst list but it was the first song of 2019 that I took an instant dislike too and well…

2. “7 Rings” by Ariana Grande

Man, I was really starting to like Ariana Grande and she goes and releases this awful trap ridden garbage that her cooing sounds terrible over which features an interpolation of “My Favourite Things” from Sound of Music? I mean come on Ariana, you are better than this especially when “Into You”, “Love Me Harder”, “No Tears Left to Cry” and even “Dangerous Woman” exist!

Also the message of the song is a horrific one, if you feel sad, go out and spend a tonne of money because Ariana’s fans all have parents who are loaded with money and can afford to let their kids splash out on a new doll or whatever because they are feeling sad. Capitalism isn’t something we can revert to whenever we are feeling miserable, Ariana, that isn’t healthy for anyone.

This is a gross and frankly awful song that hopefully will be forgotten about but its not my number one so what could possibly be worse than what I’ve already spoken about?

My number one song reflects how toxic the world is right now in all kinds of ways, this guy should never had a top ten hit with this nor should this have been excused by so many people.

1.       1. "Hot Girl Bummer” by Blackbear

This song just shouldn’t exist, it just shouldn’t and the fact this song became a bigger hit in Australia than the song it rode the magic carpet off that being “Hot Girl Summer” by Megan Thee Stallion feat. Nicki Minaj and Ty Dolla $ign is a crime worthy of having somebody locked in Long Bay jail for and the fact he dropped this cheap crappy synth and trap slog makes me question whether hip hop and popular music have any god damn standards anymore.

The implication that all these girls that Blackbear is meeting with at this party are stupid and cheat every Thursday unlike him, the stench of rising crappy misogyny rising from this stinky turd is actually intolerable especially as Blackbear is the one painting himself as somebody who would never cheat and oh he is too big to fit in a condom. I mean please that is gross.

At the end of the day, this song is the pissy, disgusting kind of garbage the charts can ill afford, worst hit song of 2019 and if we’re lucky, Blackbear will fade into relative obscurity.